BBFS - A plea for change

I appreciate Lea's candidness. I am sure many providers and clients look to her as an example. Perhaps her admonition of bbfs will help stop the activity and make the hobby a safer place for all of us.

Babee is correct as to her interpretation of my original post. The fact I don't do bb has already hurt my business so posting all of this couldn't hurt it any more. She is correct that my hesitation in seeing clients who have seen the bbfs providers is due to the fact they would expect bb from me. As long as a cover is used correctly, there shouldn't be much added risk should a client have contracted something from a bb provider.

Adding to Babee's thoughts, I have found the bb thing to be prevalent from Jackson to the Coast. I have had encounters south of Jackson who wouldn't do a review because I pulled out a cover. (Reminiscent of the bad break up line "It's not you, it's me.") It is hard enough to have guys actually expend the energy to do a review without adding that additional issue.

Happy and safe hobbying everyone!

I read it maybe a bit differently.

Here's what I got out of the OP:

I don't bb.
I know other reputable providers do.
I don't bb.
I know there are clients who now think it's the norm to bb.
I don't bb.
From now on, using a bb provider as a ref means I won't see you because...
I don't bb.
If you as a client want to bb, you need to stick with others who will because
I don't bb.


Think that was the point?

So, I'm walking away with - I can't control what others do. I can only use the knowledge to protect myself and my clients. A known bb provider's entire client base is highly suspect and less apt to schedule an appt with me.

There's a reason jax was not on my tour this time around. March ain't lookin none too good easy. there's a great big hole where MS used to be for me. Just too much bs (erm bb) going down. I like to look forward to my meetings, relax have fun and not worry. If it feels like work, it's just no fun for me. If I have to one time discuss NO BB - then I am no longer relaxed, no longer enjoying myself, no longer having fun. I'm either watching my date like a hawk or watching him leave. Either way - ugh. pass.

Used to be that Mississippi had a rep for a great bunch of guys.
Now every MS inquiry gets answered with 'screen for bb. it's rampant there."

Once that rumor rolls around - the pu**y parade quits coming to town. Originally Posted by babee

I hope the entire state doesn't get a reputation because of this. I previously stated that I had a provider last year that wanted to go BBFS with me and I told her no way no day and I always have a cover available and under no cirumstances would think about BBFS. I survived too much in the military to lose it because my brains fell out of my head and went down between my legs. I have nothing against folks that feel comfortable with it, because it is not my place to judge what others prefer, but I retained my head through 20 years of military service and am not going to lose it and my life over me being foolish enough to try BBFS. Too damn many other things out there that can kill ya! Might get run over by one of these beautiful ladies!

It would be hard to condem the entire area because of this. I know that most of the quality providers do not bb and this is reassuring. Not knowing the extent of this bbing just makes it harder to know what is going on. I frequent the Gulf Coast and have for many years...that includes the Hburg and Jackson areas, Brouge and Beaumont.......Moblie and Memphis...........my travel is work related and I never know where I will end up for a few days.......but..........I will lighten my activity in the area that bbing is taking place......just lessening my exposure to folks that do that sorta thing...Captain tries not to sail in shark infested waters anyway.....ship may not sink but why take the chance....sooner or later I will dig out the info that is referenced and I shall stay away from those that are bbing........Question arises......are the bbing providers traveling....and if so where.........?????? Sombody PM me and let me know.........Captain Blade

It would be hard to condem the entire area because of this. I know that most of the quality providers do not bb and this is reassuring. Not knowing the extent of this bbing just makes it harder to know what is going on. I frequent the Gulf Coast and have for many years...that includes the Hburg and Jackson areas, Brouge and Beaumont.......Moblie and Memphis...........my travel is work related and I never know where I will end up for a few days.......but..........I will lighten my activity in the area that bbing is taking place......just lessening my exposure to folks that do that sorta thing... Originally Posted by Victor

As I said in an earlier post: I assume that every provider I see is barebacking with somebody, no exceptions.* That somebody may be a spouse, or an SO, or a person/persons she socializes with in the swinger community (since I know a fair number of providers who also are active there), or some guy she picks up in a bar (and I've seen providers blog about guys they pick up in bars and restaurants and let bone them for free... the lucky bastards).

Regardless of who those guys may be, none of them (if they're not themselves hobbyists) are any safer than those of us who are hobbyists. That's just the nature of sex in the 21st Century.

Since I presume that anyone who has the exceedingly poor taste to allow me to be intimate with them is barebacking someone (or more than one someone), I make sure I protect myself all the time, and don't worry about it.

Now my only concern here is this: Tess is one of my favorite people on earth, as well as one of my very favorite providers, and I'd hate to think that she wouldn't see me anymore because of who I may see or have seen. That would be the only reason I'd refrain from seeing anyone on her list.

Beyond that, I play safely, because it's the right thing to do.

Cheers,

bcg

* And in fairness, I would not take it wrong for any provider I see to assume that I am barebacking someone in my life. It'd be a factually wrong assumption, since I have no sex life outside the hobby and I always hobby covered, but I'm not going to be insulted by the assumption, on the "sauce... goose... gander" principle.

It would be hard to condem the entire area because of this. Originally Posted by Victor

(Completely hypothetical)

"Hey Belinda, how is business in Bolixi?"

Great, if you bareback, way off if you don't.

"Hi Tess, I'm thinking of taking a trip to Jax. Can you tell me about the area? Where to stay? Where to advertise? Who are the good ref's? Anyone who won't give me a ref? Any issues I should know about?"

Stay here, advertise there. There's a guy who pretends to be a cop. Your type will probably have x, y and z mostly as ref's. Well there is a bb issue from one or two so just be aware.

"BB! Are you kidding? How bad is it?"

Two years ago, it was just rumor. One year ago, it was Damn, can you believe this shit? This year..it's making a huge impact.

Now

Most travelers will then ask Who's barebacking?

So who should the local ladies protect? Those who do bb, because they are local? Or those who don't bareback? By naming names - you could literally destroy a reputation and thus business/'social' standing. OR ...you get labelled as a jealous vindictive bitch and ruin your own. By not saying anything - are you saying it's ok? Are you then jeopardizing others? Sort of like the Good Samaritan laws?

Tess only addressed the health issue. And that should be enough.

The provider side is a bit more complicated. If you are considering travel to an area, there are many factors to consider. A bb pandemic is a huge determining factor. Yes, there is a huge economic whiplash when bb starts in an area. Local ladies not only begin to get one on one pressure to bb from clients (cause so&so let's me), but a schism (for lack of a better word) starts developing. Providers who bb and providers who don't. Then the client base splits along the same ...then the bb client base starts to aggressively spread.

It's that aggressive spread being addressed here. THAT is really ALL that can be addressed. Is bb in MS a pandemic? Nah but it's become an issue for damn sure. It's insidious, rarely brought to the light and let's face it....for some providers, who can't travel out of the area to a safer area, they begin to feel pressure. Their appointments slow, those they do see start to pressure for bb..since everyone is now doing it (perception maybe not reality), kids are hungry, rent is due, utilities are late this is only the 3rd date you've had this week....what do you do? Some don't have a secondary income or are not as strong as a Tess or a Belinda.

Should you repeat a rumor? No, I don't think so. I could (and did) say - there is rumor of a bb issue. But we are NOT addressing rumor. We are talking fact here. We are past rumor. Known providers. Known clients.

I have always enjoyed MS. TBH, MS has a something special going on. Great providers, great clients and that MS charm (yes it exists). This is something that I think MS will self correct. There is an uncommon camaraderie in MS. You have a few providers doing bbfs. While it was contained to a few providers and a few clients..it was bad enough, but known and fairly easy to deal with. But the clients are growing in number, and bb is being pushed - sometimes point blank, sometimes in a pleading manner, sometimes in a very passive aggressive manner...but it's impacting other ladies' and in more than a business sense.

If you are not barebacking, keep doing the same. If you are barebacking (and there's enough FACT that yes, male and female names could be called) - keep to those who do and quit trying to compromise those who don't.

Seems like the non bb MS ladies are saying loud and clear: "Enough. I don't and I won't and do not push me any farther on it." Naming names makes it a he said/she said/she said drama-rama free for all.

It has recently been confirmed that there are a few area providers who regularly provide BBFS. ? who confirmed and who are they? WOW this is really helpful. Let's keep this thread going

I may have found some proof. Can anyone identify this provider and client ? It's hard to tell in this picture because he actually may be covered under his shorts.

My Gosh. I think that is Steven Spielberg..



Sorry, Not trying to make light of the subject matter. It is very serious.
Just trying to lighten the mood a little.

Just assume if she is highly reviewed and is included in the hints in this thread....she's barebacking.

End of story until someone says something.

So here's the list:

Ill post all the ladies with the most reviews and fanfare and we can speculate lady by lady. Its a short lists guys.

Way too many people are concerned about this from both sides.

I'm still waiting on a pm as to who does this regularlyand which providers used as references locally are representation of bbfs through the reference verification process....apparently no one knows anything.

and NO ONE IS GOING TO SAY ANYTHING EITHER! this thread was not started with the intension of outing anyone, it was to bring some light that is it out there. so can we stop trying to figure out who it is and get on with it

Damn a lot of drama going on in the Mississippi forums since I started posting lmao. Am I bad luck? Or am I the anti-christ. lol

and NO ONE IS GOING TO SAY ANYTHING EITHER! this thread was not started with the intension of outing anyone, it was to bring some light that is it out there. so can we stop trying to figure out who it is and get on with it Originally Posted by elegantbelinda

I agree wholeheartedly. I have already said my piece and have admitted to using some bad judgement with a very few close friends as have some others. I did not BBFS widely as some may have thought. But, I am now totally "No BBFS" and I will work hard to make sure what Tess started, which was awareness of an issue and the dangers thereof, stays at the forefront of this conversation.

Here is the bottom line guys...

If you are sure the provider has never done BBFS, use a cover.
If you are sure the provider has done BBFS, use a cover.
If you haven't got a clue is she has done BBFS, use a cover!!

USE A COVER!

Smooch!

Lea

and NO ONE IS GOING TO SAY ANYTHING EITHER! this thread was not started with the intension of outing anyone, it was to bring some light that is it out there. so can we stop trying to figure out who it is and get on with it Originally Posted by elegantbelinda

Ok well now I'm confused. Both with the original posters intention of the thread as you define it, she defines it, and your posting actions. All of which haven't been deleted or altered.

Your post(which many page by page asked about with no answer)

its a bitch when doing a double or something and the other lady does not use a comdom, its very awkward..... Originally Posted by elegantbelinda

Hmmm. This alludes to the fact that you are aware of the pooblem of the original poster. So it backed up her claim since you are reputable and credible here. Then you followed that with a little info of your own in this quote. Which singled out a few ladies. Choose your words more wisely next time when you discuss intimate and specific situations such as that. People can archive your reiews and draw conclusions. And they may have the wrong persons....

I commend you for the std info. That was straight facts...and not heresay. No names were needed there lol.

shall i carry on??? Originally Posted by elegantbelinda

I thought you were going to....but we never heard back...

Again, I'm not naming names....It is unfortunate that the providers are very well reviewed, very popular and (formerly?)well respected.
Originally Posted by JxnBiLady

I commend you for not naming names.....wait no I don't...but if I risked getting banned (as a person could for naming names) for putting info out that might be beneficial to most and this was one of few sites I had to get business on id fathom it I guess....

You also alluded to the fact that highly reviewed and popular providers are participating in bbfs locally. And anyone with a brain knows that is a small lists.

You could have easily said "ladies in this area are participatin in unsafe activities". But after a few people responded you left a big hint. That doesn't make you drama filled or a starter...but u added to it.

At some point in an extended time period in the hobby, at some point, and almost every provider, agency girl or whatever has been in a situation or has allowed herself to get close enough to someone over a given course of time to allow that type of behaviour to happen. Shit, even I have done it a few times over the 13 years that I have been in this line of work (but i do get tested every so often and i have ltr with the select that i had chosen to do this with and it was not all the time). To sit here and try to mainly pinpoint any specific girl is not the idea...
Do i do this now? Absolutely not...
I have pulled myself toward better conduct than that of allowing myself to become attracted to gentleman outside the hobby.