Why does it have to be someone's loss?

There are some good responses here, but most seem to get to the "defense" conclusion and stop. Taking it one step further, maybe it's because our society today is leading people to believe that there are no "losers" and everyone gets a blue ribbon. That may be fine and dandy until you get in the real world where not everyone is equal and some may be having cultural shock due to the sudden realization that not everyone gets to come in first. Therefore, to make themselves feel good again, they call it a loss on the other one's part. Sounds like mind games to me. There's nothing shameful about the red or green ribbon. Heck, there's almost always something/someone better out there. Just a hard reality check. ........flame suit on!

This has certainly got to be one of my favorite threads ever and I actually read every line of everyone's posts. It was informative without being argumentative and I have learned better from Traci's writing style and attitude. She has by far, been one of my favorite individuals on this board and I am happy to see that she maintained the thread without allowing drama to ensue the differences of opinions and how they were stated by each individual.

That being said, my .02 is probably much more emotional than Traci's logical one would be. I can imagine those who have empathy for another person's disappointment concerning being declined and them wanting to help smooth out the "ruffled feathers" when they state something like this. Using simple cliches of this nature are just a way of saying "I feel your pain". Most of us have experienced being turned away at some point in our lives and most of us understand this normal human emotion of being rejected, hence the need to comfort even if passive aggressively or if it's at the expense of the so called "offending party". It's human nature, even in a community such as ours, to lash out at those who offend one of "us" or hurt our feelings.

Maybe explaining in as nice a way as possible when rejecting someone would go a long way to ensure this particular cliche is used a little less. That's what I do when I reject seeing someone, rather than avoiding them or simply telling them I can't or won't see them. There are those we do have to be blunt with because they just can't seem to take no for an answer, though. It happens at times, but I am thankful it doesn't happen too often. I hate to say No, but I will and do. And yes, there has been the occasional gent I did end up seeing because they used the same tactics suggested earlier in the thread by Lust4xxxLife, rather than getting upset with me. Originally Posted by M A X

Thanks so much for posting, Max! I was really hoping more ladies would post with their opinions, and I love yours. I don't see your explanation as illogical or even very emotional. I think it is very rational and understanding. I like your preventative approach, and I'm glad that someone touched on it. How we handle situations like this can definitely affect the response and general attitude of the other party.

And thank you for the awesome compliments! You're a very sweet lady and I'm glad to have met you.

Cool thread by a cool lady!

Traci where can I sign up for the class on class?