Why Providers and not Affairs?

On second thought, I think I'll delete my post.

..... I was the lottery winner that night. She used me...and I was SO upset about it I cried.... The point is, guys don't just pay for it because they're not capable of getting anything on the side .... And like Good2BMe, my last mistress, who was hot, fun and a total nympho wanted more and more and more. Texted constantly. ..., it was probably more costly than if I'd just paid for it..... It wouldn't be fair to say a girl here does this because she couldn't do any better for herself in another job. .... Originally Posted by Sens55

Silly Girl has just been way off base on this one; and I had to respond. The only new comment: If a girl feels that she has been used, she can call the law and make your life a living hell. This is very unfair, and it happens a lot. When a mistress turns on the control button, one will only wish that he had just paid a provider.

A provider can provide security and a lot of protection, if it is the right girl. From the posts that I have read: I like both Jackie and Silly Girl; however, I would never call either of them because they have made absolute statements that they require knowing the true -outside of the hobby- identity of a client. That is OK for them, and I understand their concerns. So respect the rules of the house.

After I lost my first wife I asked some girls out for dinner, and immediately learned to love the song with the the words "...just going down the road, trying to lighten my load; I got 7 women on my mind." Well I had eight, and trying to get them all on the schedule, service them all, and try to get to know them, and look after my children - even with the help of my mom and mother-in-law, was just too much. I began to hire a provider when I needed one. I quit dating everyone that wanted me, and became much more selective with the woman I would allow into my life, and did not have sex in any relationship for a long long long long time, and then she had asked me several times. I wanted to be able to have sex help seal a permanent relationship for the woman. The women I later married for the second and third marriages were true companions and partners. The providers helped me with sex, but they were not allowed to help with my children Not fair? Maybe! The point is the woman I married the second time had to love my children, my old in-laws and most of my family (i don't even like all of my family, but that is off the subject), as much as she wanted me: it was a total package. Blending families is never easy, it is a job you have to work at with total commitment. That is why, until now: I have only used the hobby when I wasn't married. First period: 1) during Nam to relieve the stress, and it really helped. The shrinks did not begin to comprehend what all of us guys had encountered, besides in my unit all of us had at least the same IQ or higher than the doctors who debriefed us. It was the girls who helped all of us to relax. They called it R&R. 2) after the death of my first wife to relieve the grief (it is better and cheaper than a shrink). 3) Briefly, after the death of my second wife. Briefly, because I quickly found another woman, but by then my kids were grown. 3)My third wife is older, and I take care of her. Just maybe she will outlive me, I could drop dead of a heart attack tomorrow. My life is full and I love her, I just don't care that sex is absent from our relationship. I once made a joke when she asked why I still loved her and I answered: because of all the great sex. Her answer: "I don't want to know where you are getting it." I know she loves me, and I will never joke about this again.

We all have individual situations in our lives that determine our needs. We all have to have goals and a direction in our lives, and the motivation to go after what we want. I wanted a second mom for my kids, and I got a good one. I loved #2 and she died too. I found #3, and I love her too. I went after three women and I got what I wanted. I quit my job when wife#1 died to raise more money for my children. I have started and sold 4 corporations, I own other businesses now. In between, I have dated and rejected women who are lawyers, doctors, business owners and civic leaders while using providers to stave off the need for intimate sex while evaluating in depth a possible mate. I have been very lucky in this life.

So Sill Girl: A guy can't find another woman if he uses a provider; don't be silly!


JR

I like both Jackie and Silly Girl; however, I would never call either of them because they have made absolute statements that they require knowing the true -outside of the hobby- identity of a client. That is OK for them, and I understand their concerns. So respect the rules of the house. Originally Posted by JRLawrence

I really do like you too, JR, (at least "who" you are online, since we have never met) and I have enjoyed our discussions both in various threads and via PM.

I would like to point out, however (and it is something I have expressed to you directly previously), that if a potential client uses an alternative screening service (such as P411, etc.) that has already confirmed their identity and if they are well referenced by other ladies with said service, that aside from a quick glance at a photo ID so I can be relatively assured that they are who they proclaim to be with the service, that I have no need to collect or have knowledge of their identity past that cursory glance. I don't have a photographic memory and I certainly don't look at an ID long enough to know where you live nor do I care - I don't collect personal information in that instance - in fact, I don't collect it in some other instances either, but you've refused to offer references. Any reference. You don't even have a single review posted here . . . And, I will not go behind closed doors with ANYONE that refuses to show me some form of identification that reasonably assures me they are who they say they are . . . and there are a vast many Escorts and providers that feel the same. In fact, the "provider guidelines" at P411 actually recommend confirming a client's identity by doing exactly as I have outlined, which is why a P411 client ID is "built" the way it is, with the client's date of birth available to be confirmed by a valid legal document . . . In some parts of the country there are ladies that will lock a gentleman out of an appointment if they don't produce a driver's license at the door. I don't go quite that far, but I will want to make sure you haven't borrowed or bought a P411 account . . . which happens, infrequently - but, it does happen (Gina is awesome about shutting it down and in catching it).

I just thought I would point out, for the sake of fairness, that I do not require knowing the "true -outside of the hobby- identity of a client" in every instance. However, in the instance of having not one previous reference, yes, I may confirm a potential client's identity using various methods. Those without previous experiences usually don't mind . . those that simply refuse to offer references sometimes have something to hide (that isn't directed at you). If I did require one's "true identity" (to be somehow recorded) in every instance, well, I wouldn't have many of the wonderful clients that I do - but, I can CONFIDENTLY say that I don't currently have one single client that would shive a git if I knew their full name, their wife's name, their children's name(s), where they lived, where they worked, etc. - becasue they KNOW that even if I do know, I've never revealed or violated a client confidence, ever. I get paid very well to be discreet and keep secrets. My clients have taken steps with me (and one of those steps is verification / screening) to ensure that we have trust and an understanding - and they trust me (becasue they can - becasue I am trustworthy) in return.

Kisses,

- Jackie

Jackie and I have been known to butt heads on occasion but in this case I think she is 100000% right about not seeing someone that has no references. (I hope the sky isn't falling....LOL) I know newbies don't want to hear that but in my opinion....for what ever that is worth, if a lady entertains guys with no references it isn't a matter of IF she will ever get busted it is a matter of WHEN!!!

As for SillyGirl's comments about why guys see provider's.....I think her handle says it all!

As for the original topic of this thread.....I see providers for two reasons.....they don't expect me to call them tomorrow and I see them because I can!! LOL!!

Bubba has a great point. I was thinking about his earlier. One MAJOR difference between a provider and a mistress or a SB is I can see one today and may not see them for several months. And for most that's ok. If I did that with a mistress of a sb id be without either/both of them.

A mistress would not fit my lifestyle. I don't play while home, and don't frequent the same places more than twice.

I have met some great providers, and really wish I could frequent a few of them again, but not likely.

Like Sens55 stated, frequent travelers tend to congregate somewhere and sometimes I can get lucky.

But I can always count on a provider

This thread is umm.....interesting. For me it all boils down to one sentence:

If you think that a guy on this board or any other escort website couldn't have a nice piece of ass without paying for it (escort) that would be the same as the guys thinking that you're a hooker because you're not smart enough to get a job that pays more then $7 bucks an hour out in the real working world.

Is that a fair assessment? Only you can answer that.

Visiting providers is a safe and easy out for gents who don't want the headaches of a mistress or even more....don't want to risk their marriage because feelings from the mistress usually comes into play. Hell have no fury like a woman scorned.

Looks only matter so much when it comes to hooking up. Of course I love hot looking men, but they're usually too cocky or dumb (young ones). Now, you give me an average guy who smells good, intelligent and most importantly, can make me laugh...I'll give you sex twice a day. Better yet, give me Michael Buble and I'm set!

Now, lets conquer the reference thing since it was touched upon by JR, Jackie and Bubba. I agree with Jackie and Bubba (gasp), I always stand by what my gut tells me and what P411 recommends....make sure the ID matches up to his P411 ID.

I am newbie friendly, but he has to pass my screening. If that includes showing me some ID, then so be it. If he doesn't want to, then he's free to go visit another lady who is willing to take that chance because I won't.

I will agree with Jackie one more time in saying that I don't always ask for ID from a gent. But, his references need to be so golden that they help make the sun shine. Trust me, I've had something happen that makes me confident that I know that person is exactly who they say they are. Because, if I'm not confident then I will ask for ID.

I <3 this thread.


I also <3 that peeps seem confused about the difference between generalities and absolutes.

Sorry, what's <3 mean?

A little sideways heart.

I <3 this thread.


I also <3 that peeps seem confused about the difference between generalities and absolutes. Originally Posted by SillyGirl

I H8 coded stuff, but I

<3 SillyGirl.

I'm not married.

I had a chance to have an affair with a stripper that I got to know, but I blew it off as her making a sales pitch, but came to realize that she was serious. I didn't pursue it because I thought she was a little nuts. Once she realized that I wasn't interested in seeing her outside the club, she got all pissy whenever she saw me. She told other dancers that she thought she loved me and that I broke her heart. She was really good looking and had a rocking hard body, but that nuts in the head factor scared me off.

......... but that nuts in the head factor scared me off. Originally Posted by KCJoe

Exactly, meeting anyone new is dangerous without adding the factor of gender and sex. If you want sex with a woman for the long run, you develop and work at the relationship. If you don't want the long term with her, pay for it; protect yourself.

I don' want a fine looking nut case contacting my daughters. There are a lot of ways that we can protect ourselves. Any provider, and any guy, who doesn't take precautions to protect themselves against the occasional "nut in the head factor" is just not tuned in to reality.

JR

This really is a focused research discussion to establish what the customers' value.

Lilianna was masterful in her provocatve approach to stimulate lots of discussion. Appreaciated Jackie and Elena wisdom.

It also helped focus my understanding of what our suppliers value.

Brilliant!