Busted By Wife

OP I don't believe any of the posters answered your question. And I noticed only 5-6 women posted anything. I think the majority of providers prefer not to know their clients status, or would rather believe they are single/divorced or not getting any at home and they are "saving" a marriage.
You stated, "she's is a wonderful wife and great in bed"
I'm going to go out on the limb here and state that if the ladies were not in this business, and your wife was their friend they would tell you "Your an Asshole"

I have been married for over 30 years and I am 52 years old. Great shape, very active, and do lots of traveling.


I have been a hobbyist for around 12 years and my wife finally found one encounter I had. My mistake and I hate for her to hurt because of it.


The dilemma I have is quite simple, do I still want to be married or do I want to keep exploring the wonderful women of the world?


I seems selfish to me to want to leave a wonderful wife who is also great in bed over a hobby but I am not getting any younger and there are still thousands of women out there whom I would love to meet.


Am I an asshole for thinking this way? Originally Posted by jesseman22

Whatever you had with her is over. She’ll never trust you again. Unwise to cheat if you love her and she’s a great lover. Not passing judgement, because I’ve strayed off the porch. But never when those two were present.

I considered the same remedy. Until I realized with only half of what I have I won't be able to afford the purchase of quality women. So I just continued to cheap and hope I don't give her anything that keeps on giving.

where else can he air his dirty laundry and possibly get some advice from others who have been caught? it makes sense to me.

That being said... DENY and sweep it under the rug. Wait a long time and don't get caught again.

You don't need to let this ruin both of your lives.
Trust me, you don't want to be single over age 50. Its horrible.

I agree.
Also, if you get married again marry a girl who likes girls on the side for a little fun every now and then. Originally Posted by friendly fred

Those types will be gobbling cocks when you're at work, I say if a guy is thinking of leaving your wife over hooker pussy, don't do it! Don't be a fool

All men cheat.

Years ago I would have never said this, but my position now, as a woman is, 95% plus of men are going to cheat on their partner from time to time, so you might as well be with a man that is awesome, you adore, has a stable income & comes home every night.

If he is doing those things, don't worry about what he is doing for the few hours he is not with you.

The only exceptions to this would be if he brings home an STD, knocks another woman up or starts spending so much money he is neglecting his wife & home, other then that, don't worry about who he may or may not fuck from time to time.

It's true, what you don't know can't hurt you.

I cant even have this conversation with my civilian female friends because they all swear their husbands are faithful while in reality I'm sure 1 or 2 or 20 have handles on this board.

Women should not think about or look for evidence that their partner is cheating, they should just focus on the positive & continue building their bond.

All men cheat.
...
I cant even have this conversation with my civilian female friends because they all swear their husbands are faithful while in reality I'm sure 1 or 2 or 20 have handles on this board. Originally Posted by Brooke Wilde

This made me wonder if any of them had hit you up for a date.

And if they had, what would you do?

All men cheat.

Years ago I would have never said this, but my position now, as a woman is, 95% plus of men are going to cheat on their partner from time to time, so you might as well be with a man that is awesome, you adore, has a stable income & comes home every night.

If he is doing those things, don't worry about what he is doing for the few hours he is not with you.

The only exceptions to this would be if he brings home an STD, knocks another woman up or starts spending so much money he is neglecting his wife & home, other then that, don't worry about who he may or may not fuck from time to time.

It's true, what you don't know can't hurt you.

I cant even have this conversation with my civilian female friends because they all swear their husbands are faithful while in reality I'm sure 1 or 2 or 20 have handles on this board.

Women should not think about or look for evidence that their partner is cheating, they should just focus on the positive & continue building their bond. Originally Posted by Brooke Wilde

This is true, this happens in every economical level too! You can cheat with a hooker or with your McDonald's co-workers. Tell your friends that men are great actors.

This made me wonder if any of them had hit you up for a date.

And if they had, what would you do? Originally Posted by SlowHand50

Thankfully they have not.

If anyone of their husbands actually showed up at my place, I would let them in, then simply decline the appointment.

I would let them know that under NO circumstances will I be telling their wife & that they should never speak of this interaction between us to anyone at anytime. We'll both take it to the grave.

All of my friends have children, houses, careers & seemingly good marriages & I don't believe seeing a hooker every once in a while is worth ruining all of that.

The fact of the matter is, if they got divorced & remarried, there is a HUGE chance their next husband would make the same "mistake" their previous husband did so it's pointless.

Focus on home. Focus on health. Focus on happiness. Love your life & live in the moment.

If you want to know for absolute certainty that you're not getting cheated on, stay single!

Men lie to the women they "love" & tell the truth the women the "like".

This is true, this happens in every economical level too! You can cheat with a hooker or with your McDonald's co-workers. Tell your friends that men are great actors. Originally Posted by BLM69

No way I'm telling any of them that.

When my friends start discussing how faithful men are or are not, I suddenly have to use the restroom or get something from my car

Frankly, I don't want to put any negative thoughts in their head.

Thankfully they have not.

If anyone of their husbands actually showed up at my place, I would let them in, then simply decline the appointment.

I would let them know that under NO circumstances will I be telling their wife & that they should never speak of this interaction between us to anyone at anytime. We'll both take it to the grave.

All of my friends have children, houses, careers & seemingly good marriages & I don't believe seeing a hooker every once in a while is worth ruining all of that.

The fact of the matter is, if they got divorced & remarried, there is a HUGE chance their next husband would make the same "mistake" their previous husband did so it's pointless.

Focus on home. Focus on health. Focus on happiness. Love your life & live in the moment.

If you want to know for absolute certainty that you're not getting cheated on, stay single!

Men lie to the women they "love" & tell the truth the women the "like". Originally Posted by Brooke Wilde

Suck, swallow, rinse, repeat.

That’s f-ing ridiculous and your response frankly pisses me off. I’m a bi-sexual woman that loves to share my husband with other women because I also enjoy pleasing a woman...I’ve never stepped out, no need to with true honesty and respect. Perhaps you should stop stereotyping women. Unicorns do exist and those lucky men that have us know the value of their fortune and we return it in plenty....

No way I'm telling any of them that.

When my friends start discussing how faithful men are or are not, I suddenly have to use the restroom or get something from my car

Frankly, I don't want to put any negative thoughts in their head. Originally Posted by Brooke Wilde

Like you stated in your earlier post, what they don't know won't hurt them. I've cheated and been with plenty of married women

I've also been cheating on, that was like letting a caged animal out, haven't stopped eating since. I'm like a elephant, I don't forget

continue on, but learn to be like a Cat, and cover up your shit after you take one. Originally Posted by Chung Tran

ditto....its cool you wanna stay married...thats admirable! BUT a man has needs and if they arent being met at home,I see no reason to not seek outside help...just be discrete!

At 25, my wife injured her back, two slipped discs and some nerve damage. The nerve injury caused her body to stop producing estrogen, her cervix began atrophying, and she lost all interest in sex.

Her mother died of cervical cancer when she was 12. So she has a huge fear of cervical cancer. HRT [estrogen therapy] might help her, but she is convinced that it would kill her.

Her genitals at completely atrophied. Any touching is painful. Digital manipulation of labia will cause them to rash, the skin cracks easily and bleeds.

She is light-skinned and allergic to just about everything [most lubricants and some soaps].

She hid that her nature was to be 'asexual' during our courtship, and the first 3 years of marriage. She never liked sex, and she has never experienced an orgasm. But she was willing to be playful, for my sake when we were newlyweds.

After her spinal injury, she let herself embrace her natural dis-interest in sex.

She knows that I have a sexual need, but she does not want to know about it in any manner. She wants me to take care of my own needs in a manner where she would never be reminded that my needs exist. Originally Posted by RetiredSubmariner

"The broad definition of demisexual is that you only experience sexual attraction in the context of a close, emotional bond." That is nonsense. Regardless of our emotional bond, men still have their prostate fill up, and that means we need some relief. Remember the term: "get your rocks off"?

Good for you. I too have a wife that I love, and care for. When I need sex; the hobby is there.

But when I meet a lady, it is expected that she be a lady and treat me as a gentleman. Too many of the girls just behave badly, talk poorly and treat a guy like he has no value beyond just giving her money. That is an insult!

The successful ladies in this hobby soon find that they can retire. The ugly ignorant ones, who hang on for years, do so because they can't even be a successful companion.

I find few women I would take to the symphony, and my wife can not do that with me any longer. I appreciate the company of women and used to take my granddaughters, but now they are grown and married with young children to lol after.

I work and take care of my wife because we still have a close emotional bond: she is my best friend. By the time she passes I will probably not need sex anymore. But meanwhile, where are the ladies with which we can just have a little fun? Sex is enjoyable. My marriage is a dedication.