Bummer - I got my first NC/NS – I need some input

Bummer - I got my first NC/NS – I need some input


Background


Having had wonderful hobby experiences in Dallas once I learned how to do my homework on the ladies I want to see (thanks ASPD and now ECCIE!), I have lucked out several times and now have a few ATFs that consistently deliver outstanding service. I see them frequently. I figured I can do the same in Austin. My business is growing there and I can certainly start developing some relationships with Austin providers.


I posted a question in the Austin Locker Room “Who is the girl that best represents Austin?” Kudos to the board members from Austin, I quickly got several responses and the trends were easy to see, a few names repeated several times. This was my preliminary selection.


I do my homework. I check their reviews, board posts, websites and reviews on other boards… The top Austin ladies have outstanding reputation (at least in paper). In the process I decide who is my top choice.


I have my P411 in order with not a lot but a few “okays” from my wonderful ATFs here in Dallas so I decide to contact the top provider in my list.


Contacting the “provider”

My first contact, via P411 messaging, asks her to check my P411 to see if we are a good match and also request her availability for the days I am going to be in town. She responds that we are a good match but tells me it is too early to setup an appointment and asks me to email her at most a month ahead of the planned appointment.


I contact her again a few weeks ahead via P411 appointment request and she replies “that day and time works for sure”. Great we have a time to play!!!


I contact her via email five days before the appointment and she sends me the initial instructions to reach her place and her phone number.


I confirm again via email one day before and I get no response (1 red flag).


The day of the appointment


I call her 40 minutes before the appointment before driving to her place but her phone is cutting off and I have a hard time leaving a message. Not knowing if the message got through I send her another email telling her I am on my way. No response (2 red flag).


I arrive at her place 10 minutes ahead of the scheduled time and I call her number. No response. I leave a voice mail.


The NS/NC and the excuses

I get a call back from her. She tells me she forgot about my appointment, that she is very sorry and offers to reschedule. I have no more time to play in this trip and I let her know I am from out of town so it will be hard to reschedule (clearly she didn't take the time to learn who I was). She promises she will make it up to me and offers me a one or two hour session at half the price, my choice.


I feel like SHIT! I did my homework, (1) she came recommended by ECCIE hobbyists, (2) she has good reviews here, (3) she has good reviews in other boards. I don’t know what went wrong? What happened? I get a huge disappointment feeling that will later hang out with me in my trip back to Dallas. At a loss for words I politely tell her to email me her offer so she won’t forget and hang up the phone.

Shortly after I receive an email from her. She confirms her makeup offer and repeats her “sorry”. She tells me “I hate to disappoint people”. Gosh is that what I am to her… people? No! I am a person. A guy who (1) took the time to plan the appointment, (2) a guy who carefully shaved his balls per her preference documented other board posts, (3) a guy who meticulously cleaned his body in preparation and (4) most importantly a guy who could have been having a wonderful time with another Austin provider. Gosh for more than $200 an hour you would think she could take the time to read my profile and try to learn who I am. By the way, my profile is very simple it would take less than 2 mins to read it.



It has been a few days since the NC/NS and my feelings have cooled down. Personally I forgive the provider; I have made mistakes in the past too. Plus the money I was planning to spend with her has now been throughly enjoyed with some of Dallas finests. However, from a hobby perspective what is reasonable and good for everyone? Should I write a NC/NS review? Keep in mind she does have a good reputation...




Questions to the providers

Would you post an alert on a hobbyist who NC/NS a previously confirmed appointment?


Would you schedule another appointment with someone who NC/NS you in the past?


Do you expect some kind of compensation when this happens? Full rate? Half rate?


If for some reason you NC/NS someone in the past… were you able to put this behind you and have a good relationship with them?


Should I write a NC/NS review for this provider? Or should I put her at the bottom of the list?


Any advice would be appreciated.

Questions to the hobbyists

Should I post a NC/NS review?


What is acceptable compensation for a NC/NS? Would you accept her offer for a half price makeup session?


Should I just move on and visit others? Austin has wonderful options.


Any advice from the vets would be appreciated.


How to improve my game


I think the biggest mistake I made was letting the fantasy of seeing her grow in my mind. I tend to obsess about perfection and this is what makes me successful in business and life (sometimes in sex too!). Going forward I will only let myself obsess over providers I know and trust. What do you think?
As offensive as her NC/NS was I think this provider wanted to see me (and get my donation, of course, ha!). She is just unorganized and is letting this mess her business. From now on, I will be more hands-on when scheduling with unknown providers. I will require an in person confirmation (via phone) before heading out to a session (or shaving my balls!). Of course in the vast majority of cases this is too much trouble... so I guess I will spend more time with the ladies I know here in Dallas.

The standard response is usually to wait a few days, see if she tries to contact with you with a valid excuse (or at least try and make things right), and if you still want to post a report (not in the review format) in the appropriate forum.

A NCNS sucks. No two ways about it, it can be very frustrating and disappointing. It also feels disrespectful. And, there's rarely a valid excuse. For me, however, a sincere apology goes a long way to smoothing things over. An offer of a discount or extra time also goes a long way because it's tangible evidence to me that the apology is sincere. From my personal experience, most of the time you won't even get an excuse, let alone an apology or discount offer. So, I'd say the provider in question is trying to do right by you. Whether you want to take her up on her offer or move along is up to you. You sound like you're still resentful and angry and I don't know how you can have a good session if that's the way you feel. Personally, I wouldn't write a NCNS of someone who sincerely tried to make it up to me even if I didn't take her up on the offer.

If you do still want to see her, you might suggest extra time in lieu of a discounted session. The more discounted the sessions is the less likely they seem to ever occur and she might feel taken advantage of by you if you push for a big discount with the implicit threat of a NSNC report if it doesn't take place. Extra time is more of a win-win situation IMHO. I was recently canceled on by a very well regarded provider on short notice because of a mistake she made. She offered a steeply discounted one hour session. Instead, I suggested we have dinner together off the clock before a regular rate one hour session. I think she appreciated me being cool about the problems and not trying to squeeze everything I could out of the situation and I had a great time with her hanging out and BCD.

I also would suggest that you seem too uptight about all this, but you seem to know this about yourself already. NSNCs happen. If you keep doing this, they'll happen again to you. Best to roll with the punches and not let yourself get too worked up about it.

best advice is give her a couple days, then get over it and move on if nothing happens!!!

best advice is give her a couple days, then get over it and move on if nothing happens!!! Originally Posted by Hawkeye9

+1

I think you're expecting more discipline from this community than it is capable of delivering and are taking a common irritating occurrence too personally.

I think you're more likely to be successful if you pre-book no more than a few days in advance. Also, be prepared to move on to plan B if plan A starts being unresponsive. Yes, unpredictable shit happens to all of us, but that's why I invented the Internet and the Cell phone. Be sure to formally cancel plan A before moving to plan B.

Maybe I'm a softie today, but I wouldn't name her in thus instance. Give her an opportunity to make it up to you.

I have had one NC/NS. I gave her several days to get back to me. After that, I posted a NC/NS report in the correct forum and let it go. 1 report is not going to hurt her but may be enough to wake her up a little. If many guys start reporting on the same girl, then she will have to clean up her act or deal with the fallout.

Questions to the providers

Would you post an alert on a hobbyist who NC/NS a previously confirmed appointment? No, its tricky, he may not show up for me, but show up for someone else. Tough call.


Would you schedule another appointment with someone who NC/NS you in the past?

No! There are men who have no problems showing up to see me, or have the heart to call or text cant make it.


Do you expect some kind of compensation when this happens? Full rate? Half rate?

Nope.


If for some reason you NC/NS someone in the past… were you able to put this behind you and have a good relationship with them?

Ummm tricky question, but no, there are so many choices everywhere, why should he give me a second chance. My dumb slip up put money in other ladies pockets. This is generally why I enjoy being plan B or C, because plan A screwed up.


Should I write a NC/NS review for this provider? Or should I put her at the bottom of the list?

Give her acouple of days.....then write one.......plenty of ladies to choice from, put her at the bottom of list, frankly you are generous, she would have been off my list.


Any advice would be appreciated.

Good luck on your next search....hopefully it be better.

Lisa

i would blow it off. if this was your first, probably won't be the last. and if you want to see her again, i wouldn't worry too much about trying to get a discounted session. those usually don't come off. have a plan B if you are determined to have a session at a particular time otherwise consider your money saved for another day, another time. i haven't had too many complete NC/NS but I've had plenty of last minute cancellations. I've learned not to sweat it too much.

Bummer - I got my first NC/NS – I need some input

Going forward I will only let myself obsess over providers I know and trust. What do you think? Originally Posted by Lifeking

dude... you probably spent more time writing this post than i spend in an average session.

here's a tip... quit obsessing over providers. maybe obsession over some things helps you in your business, but it's not good in the hobby. it's supposed to be fun. as others have stated, a nc/ns sucks... but come on. the sun will rise tomorrow, i think. probably in the east. and the weather will be glorious. and the rangers won!

it happens. get over it.

JPdM

I went to Six Flags once and the roller coaster was broke.
Just move on to the next ride.
Tell your friends if you feel you must.

I went to Six Flags once and the roller coaster was broke.
..... Originally Posted by yaddayadda

What, the roller coaster ran out of money?

The NS/NC and the excuses, They are a dime a dozen.

Just move on to the next ride and retry it again later.