Let me make sure I understand you correctly. You'll suck and fuck "random people" for your "heaps of money" so you can invest in your future plans, but you wouldn't invest in a random persons startup that could net you more profit than all those options you listed combined?
And my t-shirt comment was semi sarcasm. If you invest in a startup on kickstarter, that startup has to give a product or service to you as repayment. You can't buy shares or equity in those startups unless you're an accredited investor (make over 200k per year).
Originally Posted by jpt589
Firstly, I don't "suck and fuck" random people for money because that's illegal and I'm a very good girl.
I see gentlemen at set intervals of time and request donations and gifts towards my education for said time. May gentlemen are simply
thrilled to help out the next generation afford the rising prices for education.
However, since the world these days is pretty dangerous, I do have to ask other girls that are also being so generously assisted by our generous fairy godfathers about the gentlemen I see to make sure they're not stalker-y ax murderers. So while they might be strangers the first time we meet, they certainly aren't random. And aren't we all strangers the first time we meet?
So, while I have some degree of security with my fairy godfathers, the only assurance that I have from you is that you are fairly rude and don't feel inclined to even tell your marks--I'm sorry "investors" what your software even does, much less a portfolio, business plan, or even a website. And while your project or something like it might make more money, start ups more often than not don't start seeing any profit until several years in and are extremely unstable. So, while CDs might not promise such massive profits, it does promise that in 1-5 years I'll have more money than what I started with and won't have lost my shirt. While I'm sure we'd all like me to lose my actual shirt, I'd prefer to keep my figurative one.
But Kickstarter would be a good place to start. You can start a funding pool for your magical software and then, once you'd seen that there is both an interest (number of people donating) and positive feedback from your group of investors, you then have at least some reputation to lean on and point to when people shout "gtfo scammer" at you. Unfortunately, all we've gotten from you is a short tempter and an inability to take criticism which, for me personally, is not something I want in a man handling my money.
P.S.
Those entrepreneurs providers you're aiming for don't take kindly to people calling other girls "low life hookers" so good luck with that.
And you are insulting your potential investors.
I am sure when people see your comments on a public forum and the educational wording you use they will line up for the chance to invest.
I think you may need to learn a little bit more on public relations before you go out in public and beg for start up money.
If you came to my office and asked for an investor and I gave you advice I am thinking you would get defensive and insult my suit.
Maybe watch shark tank instead of the girlfriend experience.
Originally Posted by Gotyour6
+1
O, M, Fucking, G!!!!!!!!! I can't believe it! Good luck really does come in threes!
You see, a couple of weeks ago, out of the blue, a high ranking banking minister in Nigeria contacted me about some abandoned funds that had belonged to a long dead dictator. He was asking my help in moving the funds out of the country, and was willing to share 9.3 million USD with me for the help. Then last week I was contacted by a lottery in the UK telling me that I had won 3.7 million pounds sterling, and I hadn't even played the lottery!
Now most people would be resting easy with all that money coming in, but not me. You see, I'm sharp. I mean I'm Cracker Jack sharp. And I was worried. I knew I couldn't just let 10 or 20 million sit around. I needed to invest it and invest it wisely. What was I to do? I don't know shit about investing.
Now here I have the perfect investing opportunity. JPT, just post your bank routing number and account number back here, and I'll transfer at least 15 million into your account, as soon as it comes in to mine. If you're uncomfortable posting the information publicly, you can just dm me.
Oh, and by the way, don't pay any attention to all the sour pusses on here who tell you that The Girlfriend Experience is off base. I haven't watched it, but I am sure it is spot on. It will probably provide you with many other ideas for soliciting investors in case my 15 mil isn't enough for you.
And ladies, very soon, I expecting to be accepting application for 2 or 3 long term traveling companions (to server on a rotating basis), so you might want to brush up your showcases and start considering how you want to capture my attention.
O Happy Day!
Originally Posted by tandyscone
What a small world, I just got a couple million from that dictator's son! Nigerian princes sure do need a lot of help getting out of dodge these days.