I've gotten a feel for most of you men and womens serous side....now for the fun side!!
Ok....lets start the AD within the threAD...
Now that i have your ATTENTION...good or bad, i don't care...just look at the post count....its Advertising, i will start with my Awesome Body!!
PHOTO:
my ass
my boobs
my beautiful face
almost forgot the pictures are 100% me....although i might have gained 50 or soo lbs since taken them, changed my name a couple of times, had a few surgerys, and changed skin color....but they are still me!
Location
the corner of....
So here is the twist now that you have seen how good i look....if you choose to enter this contest you will recieve 30 mins free!!
Rules: I make them up as i go.....don't like it....don't play!!!
You only get two entries and the contest ends when I say it does or when I arrive in Austin. Who can enter? Shit kickers, business men, hot mamas, your pet turtle, or even your goat…
How do I win? come up with the best post in this threAD! The 'like' button is your friend in this threAD! It can be something funny, a picture you took or that you googled, the name of your pet turtle, the best place to get margaritas, best bar or the best place to go in Austin that I would never find unless you amazed me with your knowledge of the hill country. Will the judging be fair? No it will be funny…is there a chance I will have too many margaritas and pick a post number out of a hat if there are too many good posts? Yes.
Would I remove someone from the contest for being an asshat? Yes. but i Might I let them back in if they admit it? Yes I like me some asshats sometimes. I like them More if they know their asshats.
Do you have to be funny to win? YES, your post just has to catch my whimsy or interest, or make me laugh my ass off…go back and read the rules…again and stop being an asshat. What if you post more than twice? That’s fine too but you better have a big belt buckle and your pubs better be shaved!!
For those of you that are still confused here is an example:
Hi BDS the best BBQ in Austin is at The Salt Lick, but the best adult toy store is right between my legs…and the best margarita is the one I’m going to bring you,,, don’t go to Katz's Diner on 8th street because it’s on 6th street and also the food sucks and might give you diarrhea. Now the people watching after the bars close is outstanding, so you should go… just don’t eat unless its right before the maid comes. There is a taco truck outside, you should eat there, i take my goat there on Tuesdays....they have a goat eat free day on Tuesdays.
See simple…it can be more than one thing or only one thing or anything else. You can plead with me but no whining I hate whining, you will get no free time!
Still Confused.....Perfeck!
Fucked up grammir and punktation gets you 5 dollars off!!
Disclamier: Again....so no-one gets any of their panties in any kind of knot.....
Just so there is no mistaking....
This is in fact a threAD...
This is in fact a useless threAD...
This is in fact false advertising at its best....except the contest
Again this is in fact a threAD you probably should of never opened...
Finally this is in fact a threAD that says "Laugh with me, laugh at me, laugh for me, i don't give a dayum just LAUGH....these forums need it!!!
If you take any thing offensive in my threAD....please feel free to let me know...as i will NOT give a fukk!!
Don't worry just be lucky I'm here to visit.....i will go away after you, pass me another margarita and pay me to do my job......
..........Leave
