P411 OKs-- have you ever refused to give one after seeing a client?

I read alot about guys saying that they have to ask, sometimes practically beg, for a P411 ok. Everytime I hear that I wonder if it dawns on some that perhaps the experience was not as great as you thought it was. When giving OKs it's either a yes or a no, not a maybe or with a clause. So have you ladies ever finished a session to completion, but still didn't want to give an OK?

yes... because i issued an alert.. not going to okay someone if they are not truly ok.

I knew it!! I tried and tried and still nothing!! rofl

An 'okay' s/b just that. Yet, fems get calls, sometimes harassing or rude behaviour from other fems. Who needs that? matched with the daily demand of 'new' business/TCB. So, if fems would review the client profile, see if the amount of 'okays' meet their requirements, and learn to ask the client any further Qs in the manner to elicit the As they need, more 'okays' would come more quickly.

I've had several fems issue me an 'okay' while waiting while I showered or before I turn the key in my ignition. I always gracefully 'Thank' them. So, it just depends on the fem. The fems I meet tend to be sexy, beautiful yet very down to earth and witty. They won't take shit from anyone yet are always classy (when and if you force them to tear you a new asshole...Don't be rude!)

I would think that if it didn't go well they would not ask for an ok..but I guess you never know.

Ive never declined to give one cause they were all OK

There are times I didn't go out of my way to give the okay (and sometimes they didn't initiate it either), but I've never had to flat out refuse someone who asked for one.

I usually send the okay as soon as i get back to my computer. I get busy with family and other projects that I dont want to risk forgetting. Like i said, only NOT given one. But there were a couple that we both knew we did not mesh well.. but he was respectful, clean, didnt shortchange, wasnt violent. I gave them okays. Because they were okay.. we just didnt mesh well and that was not his fault.. Id still recommend them to other ladies.

There were a couple I saw that I did not okay. I felt completely justified and could have posted an alert, but decided against it. Nothing truly dangerous happened that could warrant a real alert. I just felt that the personalities involved were difficult and that they might give another girl a hard time. I didn't want to give an okay and then have a girl call me on it!

Yes, especially as of recently. I've conveniently "forgotten" to give around four or five okays in the last three months, and wished the other ladies had done the same as I did. Woulda saved me the hassle. But we all have our own ideas about what's acceptable behavior, which is why I don't rely solely on the number of okays anymore, or who they came from. Once upon a time, we could do that. Those days are long gone.

I didn't really "refuse" though, because they didn't ask, either. But if they had, they would have probably got their feelings hurt

Luckily I have never been put in a situation where I have been uncomfortable, threatened, or felt the need to put up with bad behavior. So, no I haven't had to turn down a p411 yet and now that I think about it, I only give an okay if the gent has requested it.

Like Lacy, I send my okays immediately. This is probably the only area where Date-Check has a better system than P411; they give the provider the option of "highly recommend," just plain "recommend," "no, I do not recommend," and "I've never met the fellow."

I've never refused an okay and never had reason to, but there is one I'd like to take back. I spent a night with a fellow in Dallas a couple of years ago, a gentleman well-respected on another board at the time, everything perfectly fine, so I gave him a P411 okay without a qualm, and even kept in touch with him. Earlier this year he was in Houston for business and visited me overnight and "forgot" to leave the donation, and when I called him 5 minutes after he rushed off the next morn, it went straight to voicemail. He texted me back an hour later and said that evidently he'd lost his wallet at dinner the previous night, even though I SAW him take it out of his trousers while disrobing for a massage AFTER we got back to my place. I sent him an email stating that if he lost it (I gave him the benefit of the doubt, or a graceful out), it must have been in the parking lot of my complex that morning, or he dropped it in his vehicle, or he packed it in his luggage, and to please look again. I also asked why he didn't notice while leaving his contribution to the Save the Irish Chihuahua Society prior to departure? The next day he emailed back that he'd send a check "at the end of the week," but never did. (This was someone who supposedly made enough money to not have to wait for a paycheck to pay me!) I reminded him again the next week, a couple more days go by, and he emails me that someone had "found" his wallet and anonymously mailed it with his credit cards and TDL to his home with a postmark from my local USPO, sans cash, of course. That's the last I heard from him. I didn't ask Gina to remove the previous okay as the way things went down, I was afraid he'd accuse me of stealing his wallet and make a big stink. I think he set me up from the get go, which deeply disturbed me as I liked him and thought he was someone I could trust. (And I emailed him THAT statement, too.) Since it's an old okay, I figure no one will ever call me as a reference anyway, but if they do, they'll get an earful and a resounding NO.

Since it's an old okay, I figure no one will ever call me as a reference anyway, but if they do, they'll get an earful and a resounding NO. Originally Posted by Fancyinheels

Your reputation is fantastic, and a lot of women (myself included) respect you. If I saw that you had given him an okay, it would influence my decision. You may not be getting contacted, but your okay will influence others.

Your reputation is fantastic, and a lot of women (myself included) respect you. If I saw that you had given him an okay, it would influence my decision. You may not be getting contacted, but your okay will influence others. Originally Posted by Ansley

So I should ask Gina to remove it even though it's over 2 years old and he has had others since? That upsets me even more since I can't imagine what I did to have him treat me this way.

(And thank you, btw, for the lovely comment on respect. I value and appreciate that very much.)

So I should ask Gina to remove it even though it's over 2 years old and he has had others since? That upsets me even more since I can't imagine what I did to have him treat me this way.

(And thank you, btw, for the lovely comment on respect. I value and appreciate that very much.)
Originally Posted by Fancyinheels

You didn't do anything to cause him to be a butthead. He took advantage of your trust.

I can't tell you what to do. If it happened to me, I would have the okay removed. In a small way it would feel like I was getting even with him.

Your welcome.

You didn't do anything to cause him to be a butthead. He took advantage of your trust.

I can't tell you what to do. If it happened to me, I would have the okay removed. In a small way it would feel like I was getting even with him. Originally Posted by Ansley

Getting even doesn't make me happier, although I hope karma will kick his keister someday. But you do bring up a valid point about a provider's reputation affecting the decisions of others, Ansley, so thank you again. I'll write Gina tomorrow and explain, and leave it up to her to decide what action, if any, to take.