Hobby Dilemma and choices

All of us hobby for different reasons. I jumped in during a low point in my marriage when the sex was drying up and our fights were getting more frequent over different bullshit, but generally about money and my lack of planning for the future.

Anyway, I started slow at Strip Clubs and graduated to AMPs. Only few Escort meetings due to my own fears. Anyway, things were looking up on the sex scene at home (thanks HRT) and we were growing closer. Then I had what could be considered a mental breakdown from stress and anxiety at work. At that point, she shifted back to cold and uncaring and sex became a necessary chore that both of us would do since we were both horny. She told me to get my shit together or get out. So I took a hobby break and have been trying very hard to get over my bullshit.

That has been for the past 6 months. I have had one hobby experience in that time that was not planned. And I thought I might be over this phase of life.

Then we had another huge fight over my breakdown and she harbors a ton of resentment.

Anyway, I don’t think she is justified in her recent actions towards me and I think I am ready to sample some Asian delights again. For the first time since I joined this site in 2018, I have not guilt or reservations about having a nice adventure. I think that is a signal the marriage has run its course.

Any of you ever experience anything similar?
Man, as Robin Williams said in Good Morning VietNam, I think ur in more dire need of
A BLOW JOB than any man I know!!! Go get one & some DATY while ur at it!
SemperFi
I agree! Think tomorrow morning I will give her something to be mad about! Of course, she will never know, but deep down I will feel justified when she calls me a worthless pieces of shit.
Sir Lancehernot's Avatar
For 46 months, I knew the meaning of love and happiness. I never felt guilty about that; rather, on those occasions when I reflected upon the situation, I felt a twinge of guilt for not feeling guilty.


The difference between someone whose every response to you reeks of "you're a fucking idiot" and someone who actually engages you in thoughtful conversation, is vast, as is the difference between someone who cut you off 26 years ago and someone who begs you to enter her now.



Saturday will be 14 months since I last saw a live naked woman, since I experienced the joy that comes with pleasing someone, since I had a meaningful kiss. I remain torn between the desire to have a mechanic determine whether my equipment is still in working order and the knowledge that the experience would, if successful (not a given at my age) ultimately, still leave me feeling empty and alone.


Yes, I'm drunk.
LustyBustyGina38FF's Avatar
You guy's need to get laid .. like right now!
Ultimate Jessica's Avatar
All of us hobby for different reasons. I jumped in during a low point in my marriage when the sex was drying up and our fights were getting more frequent over different bullshit, but generally about money and my lack of planning for the future.

Anyway, I started slow at Strip Clubs and graduated to AMPs. Only few Escort meetings due to my own fears. Anyway, things were looking up on the sex scene at home (thanks HRT) and we were growing closer. Then I had what could be considered a mental breakdown from stress and anxiety at work. At that point, she shifted back to cold and uncaring and sex became a necessary chore that both of us would do since we were both horny. She told me to get my shit together or get out. So I took a hobby break and have been trying very hard to get over my bullshit.

That has been for the past 6 months. I have had one hobby experience in that time that was not planned. And I thought I might be over this phase of life.

Then we had another huge fight over my breakdown and she harbors a ton of resentment.

Anyway, I don’t think she is justified in her recent actions towards me and I think I am ready to sample some Asian delights again. For the first time since I joined this site in 2018, I have not guilt or reservations about having a nice adventure. I think that is a signal the marriage has run its course.

Any of you ever experience anything similar? Originally Posted by BasicGuy

If you ever just need someone to listen or need someone to talk with. I don’t mind if you want to reach out to me. Sometimes we just need someone to talk us off our cliffs when we feel like we are there emotionally and mentally with all that life throws at us. Having someone to even talk to who really understands what you have gone through or what you are going through can be very beneficial!!
I was married for 14 years before I decided the hobby was just what I needed and not just physically.
Like minded people that have had the same life experiences
makes a huge difference when it comes to finding the perfect escape!!
Xoxo,
Jessica
TinMan's Avatar
OP, you should seek some counseling to determine if your marriage can or should be saved. There is no point in being miserable, and nothing in the hobby is going to change that as long as you are in an unsatisfying relationship.
OP, you should seek some counseling to determine if your marriage can or should be saved. There is no point in being miserable, and nothing in the hobby is going to change that as long as you are in an unsatisfying relationship. Originally Posted by TinMan
Wise words, Tin. I would either get separated or try counseling. No amount of pussy will help him
Ultimate Jessica's Avatar
Wise words, Tin. I would either get separated or try counseling. No amount of pussy will help him Originally Posted by shauk1960
I would agree no amount of pussy can fix whatever it is that he has or has been going through, but we are obviously not aware of his situation. Divorce can be expensive if she is the type to take him for everything he has.
That is a big decision and his not always an easy one especially if children are involved.
TinMan's Avatar
I would agree no amount of pussy can fix whatever it is that he has or has been going through, but we are obviously not aware of his situation. Divorce can be expensive if she is the type to take him for everything he has.
That is a big decision and his not always an easy one especially if children are involved. Originally Posted by Ultimate Jessica
That’s why counseling is the best way to sort all that out.
Unique_Carpenter's Avatar
You guy's need to get laid .. like right now! Originally Posted by LustyBustyGina38FF
Exactly, and that is how you end up with long term fav gals.

Tin man does have a point though. But, if the other participant isn't interested in trying, well.....
TinMan's Avatar
I just reread the initial post and would like to amend my previously stated advice.

I failed to read to the very end (a bad habit of mine), and missed the second to last sentence: “I think that is a signal the marriage has run its course”.

OP, if you truly feel that way, then a therapist isn’t what you need. Before you dive back into the hobby you need to consult with an attorney.

If you think divorce is messy and expensive now, just wait until you start participating in the hobby again and you’ll see how much worse it can get. You are much better off getting that part of your life behind you if that is how you now view your marriage.

Best of luck.
DallasRain's Avatar
Man, as Robin Williams said in Good Morning VietNam, I think ur in more dire need of
A BLOW JOB than any man I know!!! Go get one & some DATY while ur at it!
SemperFi Originally Posted by Financeman22


woohooo yessssss!!!
Ultimate Jessica's Avatar
I just reread the initial post and would like to amend my previously stated advice.

I failed to read to the very end (a bad habit of mine), and missed the second to last sentence: “I think that is a signal the marriage has run its course”.

OP, if you truly feel that way, then a therapist isn’t what you need. Before you dive back into the hobby you need to consult with an attorney.

If you think divorce is messy and expensive now, just wait until you start participating in the hobby again and you’ll see how much worse it can get. You are much better off getting that part of your life behind you if that is how you now view your marriage.

Best of luck. Originally Posted by TinMan

Great advice! I absolutely agree with your statement about not diving into the hobby or even having any kind of a sexual affair. It most definitely will hurt him in the long run when attorney’s get involved.
Thanks for the reply. I might take you up on that at some point. I did go have a little fun earlier this week, but it just left me empty. I enjoyed the moment, but then reality hit as I was in my car.