...The comment “ I’m crossing boundaries” what the fuck is that, please explain, have no clue what your talking about..
Originally Posted by littlerichard
Generally, I don't make it a habit of commenting multiple times in the same thread to explain what I previously wrote. However, you did ask and you appear to not understand my point.
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So here is my bottom line: By writing you think that your expectations are for a GFE, you should reciprocate with a BFE is crossing one of several boundaries to which I alluded, i.e. you are confusing P4P with RW dating behavior. Your being a good client has nothing to do with BFE as a BFE will cause her to question what you are really intending, i.e. a RW relationship or just NSA sex, which Alyssa has pointed out in different words.
Actually inviting a provider into your home is a serious, and highly questionable act and one I strongly suggest you don't do, ever. If you want her to feel safe then get a room at a nice hotel which is not a dive, or notel motel. Others have done that with ladies and have had a good time with the lady since she feels safer there than going into someone else's RW place. That is the first red flag I see in your OP.
The second is going to the trouble of making lunch/dinner as that is what a boyfriend would do for his girlfriend. Unless you really are her boyfriend, the best thing you can do is not do that. Don't ask why either, just realize it is out of place in P4P and if you want the good times to continue, remember your place and who you are with.
I would suggest you instead focus on being a good client. That means a) your personal hygienic is great, b) you treat her well during your time together, and c) your remuneration is in an unmarked envelope that is clearly in her view when she arrives with no folded bills inside. Note that a BFE is not part of the good client profile. BFE and GFE is all in the chemistry, as in either the two of you have it or you don't. Trying to do the BFE will complicate matters in ways you have not considered since you missed my point in my first post.
What you seem to also miss is that she is providing a service and that you desire some adventure that she is comfortable providing you. Your job is to be a gentleman so she likes, or provides the appearance of liking, being with you. Don't make the mistake of thinking that giving her a BFE is the same as doing a
quid pro quo. What she wants is a) the cash, and b) the feeling that you are a safe client for whom she does not mind providing whatever she is providing for your pleasure; it is a transaction and only a transaction. If she happens to enjoy your company, then take it at face value as a business might like you to return because you are a good customer.
If you keep the forging in mind, you will never again consider a BFE. Treating her like a human being and being a good client is all that you need to do. BFE is a major red flag and is not part of the P4P equation, unless both of you want to move things to a different level by moving your "relationship" into the RW, which I do not suggest you do for far too many reasons that you obviously have not considered.
I have been around too long, and have seen others do exactly what you are thinking and it always goes sideways. Just take some time, and think this out by reviewing the good advice you have been given by others. In the end, it is your choice but trust that others have been where you are, and have gone down that path long before you even thought about it.
Also, unlike Alyssa mentioned, I don't suggest you discuss this with the provider. If you do, I can guarantee 9 times out of 10, she will think you are falling for her even if you are not. And that mi amigo is a game over in most instances and a sure way onto her DNS list.
You have additional questions, I have answers but those answers might not be the answers you are seeking.