I got off the phone earlier today with a very close friend, a lady I've know well more than ten years. She is successful enough in this business, well liked, was exceptionally highly reviewd a couple years ago--before she went UTR and semi-retired. She lights up the room whem she walks it the room. She's had a couple serious mariage proposals from clients.
I spent two hours on the phone with her. If I could have found a flight this evening I would be on my way there now. I tried to convince her to call the suicide prevention line for herself, but I don't know if I was successful. For the past four hours her phone rings with no answer. Nor does anyone answer her daughter's phone. She is so scared that she is seriously contemplating taking her life tonight.
What is this beautiful, young, energetic woman afraid of? She is afraid of being alone and unloved. Afraid that the only way she knows how to earn enough to take care of her kids makes her an outcast to society and unloved. Unlovable.
Some people are so absorbed in the fantasy they never see the person.
I can think of few things that would scare me more than feeling I was unlovable. Unless it's hearing the cries and screams of a friend too far away to touch.
Originally Posted by Old-T
My heart goes out to women like her. I know someone going through that very same phase. The children are grown and gone, have lost respect for her, and doesn't know how to approach life without being involved with this industry.
It's the reason I feel like I preach thoughtfulness in every post. It's never too late for anyone to better themselves, and to grow out of the mind frame that makes her hate what she does, because it's become who she is.
My only fear is that all the screening in the world, and my instincts should one day fail me, and I don't make it home to my child. She is the very reason I take my time, turn down way more money than I make, and focus on being the happiest I can be outside of this industry.