In your opinion, who's responsibity is it?

This has happend to me a lot lately and I am just curious to know what you guys think. I do my best to take care of my guys and want to please, but lately I feel that has been taken advantage of.

If you come to an appointment and stay (way over) your time, do you compensate the lady for the extra time you stayed? I am not talking about 10 to 20 or even 30 minutes here. I am talking over an hour and beyond. My clients are NOT stupid. T

Also, if I am chatty, I do not factor that into my hourly rate. I do not count it. That usually means I am enjoying myself immensely & do not mind. I will even tell a man so. So this not the issue for me.

Let me just say, I am no clock watcher to begin with. I like to have fun and let things happen organically, but I also do not like my time taken advantage of either. No one does. It seems like quite a delicate balancing act lately.

I clearly have it on my ettique page that I feel it is a man's responsibility to keep up with his time. My reasoning for this is that we are not supposed to discuss money. I hate discussing money. It is a mood killer and can also get you into trouble, in more ways than one.

Like I said, I really do not care about 10 to 20 minutes here or there or if I initiate a conversation, I do not count that...BUT over staying by as much as hr or two even 3 and saying oh sorry I only brought the original donation amount, for example, when you know you are way over staying, is just bad form.

Most of the gentleman that see me do their research on me and know what to expect. They are pretty bright people, so I can not help but feel my time has been taken advantage of lately.

Have I said something to the client(s)? Yes, but it is a very akward position to be in.

I hate to rush and don't like watching the clock. It is a date, but at the same time... their are rates and boundaries for a reason.

Thoughts anyone?

I don't wear a watch so my feeling is it's your responsibility. It's your time you are providing, your responsibility to say when that is up. You yourself have put I'm not a clockwatcher in your ads. WTF? Are you or are you not?

This is role-reversal from the clock watching provider. It does cut both ways. Initially, I think it's as much the responsiblity of the client to make sure they do not overstay the agreed time as it is the responsibility of the provider when someone takes advantage - 30 minutes is too much, but an hour is egregious. I also believe that it's going to have to fall on you to end the session as elegantly as you can when this happens. If I'm feeling rushed by a provider my solution is to never come back. I know it may be difficult at times, but perhaps you should consider a similar policy from your perspective?

In a perfect world we would all be respectful of each other's time - it's the one thing none of us will ever get back. Unfortunately, some folks just don't care and will take advantage of others when they can.

Scarlett, unfortunately it is your responsibility.
It is your time and you have to stay in control of your time.
It is an akward situation, but it is something you must learn to do.

Some men do try to take advantage of a ladies time, but most, IMHO, just simply get excited when in the presence of a beautiful woman.....

Besos,

Francisca

but most, IMHO, just simply get excited when in the presence of a beautiful woman..... Originally Posted by Ms Francisca

Ms.Fran is very wise if you are pretending that nothing is wrong, how am I to know? And how stupid would I have to be to get up and leave a girl that's "acting like she likes it"?

Scarlett: Take advantage of me once, shame on you; Take advantage of me twice, shame on me

oh and while we usually CUM on time, we do not necessarily get off on time...

Hola Ms.Francisca and

Ultimately it really is up to you to take control. Looks like you've set your buffer so go with it. Remind the client at the end that you have something else to do in "X" time, get up and start cleaning up the room, etc. Just don't set the boundaries at the beginning as that's a real mood killer.

I agree with you, Fran, that it is more of a case of excitement than purposely taken advantage, but still. Very akward situation. I also see you your point, Circumstances, but if you re-read what I have written you may not be so quick to judge.

I stated that I have talked to the men that have done this. I also stated, if I initiate conversation, I do NOT count that.

I am NOT a clock watcher. No I am NOT. But over staying by hour(s) is not kosher.

Ultimately it really is up to you to take control. Looks like you've set your buffer so go with it. Remind the client at the end that you have something else to do in "X" time, get up and start cleaning up the room, etc. Just don't set the boundaries at the beginning as that's a real mood killer. Originally Posted by Loxly

I totally agree and did that!! All but.. Okay
, I think we are done here now, lol!!

I really think it's your responsibility. I've stayed way longer several times. Once, I tried to pay for the extra time and she was offended. Other times I overstayed because we were having a good time, and I felt bad and didn't want to take advantage so tried to leave and they told me they didn't want me to leave. But that was after I had already stayed quite a bit longer without them explicitly telling me to. As a client it's really confusing and I think you should be the one responsible, especially if you have a friendly personality and you're not a clockwatcher. I'm certainly not one to take advantage, but if it seems like someone wants me to stay I don't want to rush out.

Edit: I didn't see that you had already talked to the men that do this. They still do it after you tell them it's not OK? That's not cool.

It is usually not an issue. If I do not want someone to stay, I will politely excuse myself or get the shower started for them or get dressed etc.

I am just trying to understand the different perspectives. I am also trying to learn how to, as one gentleman said, elegantly handle this situation, if it happens with someone again.

Gentleman pay me very well for my time. I am aware and most certainly appreciative of that. It's just the akward little grey areas that I question sometimes.

People should probably just leave at the agreed time in my opinion. However, you're in the charm business and so if you're really charming you might inadvertently give someone the impression you really don't want them to leave and they might decide to go along with that. Should this case arise, I think it has to be you that provides the gentle reminder, just given the circumstances.

You noted yourself, sometimes (I assume not always) you really would like someone to hang around, sometimes it is too long...unless you feel you were the one that made it too long...how's a guy to know what you really want?

Looked at another way, you did make clear one way or another $x for time y at the outset. $x is paid, time y expires, now suddenly it's ambiguous-land. In any positive manifestation of this hobby you're the sole and exclusive rate-setter, at this point if you want a rate you have to get to setting :-) I suppose another way to address this would be to have a clearly communicated stance that you expect your visitors to know when their time is up and get gone on their own initiative without awkwardness if they want to see you more than once, but this doesn't sound like your style.

I would say that the responsibility of your visitor is the ability to take a hint, gracious acceptance without debate and a prompt polite leave taking or agreement to extend the time once you open the topic (and only then). Sounds like not all of your clients are doing their part on this one.

I guess I am jaded.. I get in for the time allotted and get out, I guess all those years of the Spa's in Houston.. I dont ask for more time nor do I ever expect it... plus more than likely I have other things to do

I think my expectations of others' may be too high!