Screening

I am some what of a heavy screener. Safety is very important to me. When some one is hurt or arrested everyone seems to get on the "sceening is important" soap box. But in the day to day, seems there are lots of guys who dont have the time to be bothered with it, and are not interested in doing what it takes to screen. And there are many new ladies around that dont screen at all. If something goes wrong, and she posts about it. Again, here come the "screening" lectures. So, what comes first, the gentleman's willingness to screen, or the ladies screening standards? A chicken or the egg scenario.

It seems more obvious that the old school ways are out, Also, commonality and cultural influence have greatly increased the risks.

Guys and Ladies alike, What are your opinions on this topic?

The economy has played a major role in these negative changes. It seems that some, not all, want everything hot, now, fast, and cheap. It takes longer to get a payday loan than to be screened, in some cases.
You would think that anyone who joins a site like this or any other, that they would read and ask questions on how to conduct themselves and take the time to learn what is expected from each party. I'm sure there will be comments on how some don't like to give any RL information, but again, if they do the research and find that the person they want to see has an excellent reputation and has never caused problems, it really shouldn't be an issue.
I, too, am interested in what others think.

If I were a provider I'd screen as much as possible

I screen well....If i have a problem with a guy and screening,then I would rather just pass on the potential client to be on the safe side.

Most of my guys have numerous refs and are willing to work with me on other forms if they don't.
I am a fortunate gal though....I do not have to use backpage in MOST areas....therefore getting a different type of clientele who are used to the verification process....and the majority of my clients are over 50.

My biggest problem is that I have a hard time getting reference checks back from the girls............I actually just recieved a p411 verification back that was requested 4 months ago! I had to pass on a guy who might have been a really cool dude!


I do feel sorry for a girl if she gets into trouble for not screening.....but there are enough resources out there for her to access so she can stay safe! {google can be a gal's best friend}

screening is the biggest hassle of this biz...but is most important!

{I also like the screening pocess because it also helps me to know aht kinda gent he is by the extra info a provider he has seen will share with me}

Being a hobbyist, I wouldn't see any girls who don't screen me. Y'all know the reasons. If I choose to see a provider, I would rather to be screened really hard to secure both safety.

Providers who DONT screen - always wished they did after they get caught!

LFG

I prefer someone who screens, if she is comfortable then it makes for a better session. On the flip side, one of my ATF's when I lived in Houston confused me with someone else and gave a bad reference of me. She did make it up to me

This topic falls into a Yen/Yang area.
I don't think this applies to a serial hobbyist but more to a part-time hobbyist like me. Serial hobbyist will most times have several references to work with and maybe even one where the providers know each other. I shared a lot of info with the first provider I saw and most likely would not do that now as I'm not in the same position I was in then. Each hobbyist has to determine what they will share. Each Provider has to work with what is given to them. If that or the gut check is a fail then don't see the hobbyist. But even screening isn't fool proof. It's more of an art not a science. But younger girls who provide out of their 'hometown' area will not worry as much about being busted as someone who has roots where they provide. And this tilts the supply/demand in their favor over the heavy screener. So I will probably see someone who screens less then hope she is still around for a referral when I want to play again. Boy, I wish Julie had not retired.
BTW I would be my pleasure to tickle April's fancy.
On the flip side I remember a hobbyist complaining about working his way up the 'fuck chain' (his words not mine).

It does make it hard for me to get screened by some ladies. I've stopped doing reviews 2 yrs ago, never joined P411 (don't see a reason for it), don't care for ladies knowing who I see, mostly see ladies as a UTR type deal, and self employed. Basically, shit out of luck when it comes to screening process. Ladies just have to take a chance on me!!

Ladies just have to take a chance on me!! Originally Posted by shorty

Not really.

April ... every occupation has it's "Major Leagues", "Minor Leagues", and "Little Leagues". You - and the other ECCIE ladies who are regularly visible and well reviewed are the "major leaguers".

A woman who doesn't screen is clearly not in the majors - she's farm league but ... never fear, not for long because eventually some bad guy walks through the door and she learns the hard way about screening.

What was it that John Wayne said in a movie? "Life's tough - it's tougher if you're stupid."

Since I am a big guy with long hair and sideburns and have the look of someone who could be trouble (at least that's what all the fuckin' cops I run into think) - I always cheerfully give the ladies as much personal info as they wish to have on me. When I walk through the door on the date ... I want her to be completely at ease with me knowing that I'm 100 percent safe.

Now ... I don't surf BackPage and one of the reasons i don't is because I can't trust those women with my private info.

The good men need to mind their "hobby" reputation just as much as they mind their personal reputations within the community - it makes it much easier to see girls.

As someone who's worked a lot in security - my recommendation is ... don't take a single chance. Screen every single one and screen them well. If I can sound completely sexist for a moment - I would tell you that, from my experience ... WOMEN ... have some of the worst practices for personal security possible. You girls need to realize that it's not a natural talent for you - which means you need to be more diligent about applying security procedures when you see clients.

But in the day to day, seems there are lots of guys who dont have the time to be bothered with it, and are not interested in doing what it takes to screen. Originally Posted by April Cox

IMO you should never let a persons unwillingness to be screened properly compromise your screening standards. If they can't understand that then fuggem.
You can't put a price on your well being and safety especially in this crazy world we live in.

Some are limited to the RL info that can be given out for various reasons or due to their own comfort level.
Does that mean you should lower your standards in screening? Absolutely not!
I rarely hobby and probably will always have a newbie or semi newbie status, so at times it can difficult getting screened.
Screening is necessary for everyone involved, if a provider decides not to see me I completely understand, no harm no foul.

Not really. Originally Posted by Arverni

Ladies are always taking chances. Some ladies do a really good job of screening but they still take a chance everytime the door opens.

Take me for instance. Reviews are two years old but still can give reviewed ladies as references. Yes, I know some ladies like more recent reviews but I'm not into writing reviews. I'm very frank with ladies on why I don't review and if we see each other there won't be a review coming from me. Then if I'm required to give an additional reference or two, I don't mind but most times references are out of state and lucky if lady remembers me much. Cause how many times have a out of state provider called a local provider for a reference and gotten the cold shoulder from her? Or a provider that you gave as a reference doesn't give references? Then lady your trying to see wants more references and you feel like your getting the run around?

I really don't mind giving references, them asking question's, and giving first name but checking references is going to be tough for them. I'm Self Employed, so who are they going to call to confirm I work there. Business isn't listed and I don't answer phone as XXX Business. Reviews are old, some ladies don't give references, won't remember me, or will be very cold towards lady calling for reference. So in a way, ladies do take chances if a guy gives them everything they ask for. It's not the guy's fault there Self Employed, reviews aren't up to date, or references won't cooperate with ladies.

Ladies are always taking chances. Some ladies do a really good job of screening but they still take a chance everytime the door opens.
Originally Posted by shorty

You are right. It isn't that hard to fake things. I mean people fake passports which are supposed to be almost the ultimate in gov't ids all the time. Our society is all about being fake (reality tv), keeping up with the jones' etc.

I know the ladies take a big risk. That being said, I don't want to expose myself to risk either. Listen to enough stories and you hear a ton of stories about people calling your house, etc.(don't ever give out personal numbers)....would you want someone calling your work...to see if you want a nooner? Not me.

Yes, I know. Well the ladies of Eccie are so much better. Umm, some yes. But BP is migrating over pretty fast. Just because you see someone on a site doesn't mean squat....judge a book by it's cover and all that.

So, while I am on board with the ladies being safe, I am not on board with my personal info going on the street....so it is a two way street. If the screening is too much for me, I say thank you for your time...and go find someone else. Same as the ladies do, I suppose with guys who don't give information to their screening level. On both sides....everyone has to look out for themselves and in the end by everyone looking out for themselves....everyone is safer.


Wasn't an eccie provider busted with LE who used a work ref? I mean...walk into any business with a teenager working a phone, slip them 20 and I am sure they will say what you want them to say. Prank on a buddy, etc. Million good stories you could come up with. The more crazy the story, the more likely they would probably believe it too.


This hobby is risky. No way around it, but then life is full of risks. Without risks it would be boring, you just have to know how to manage risks.

I believe in rigorous screening both ways. I had it easy getting into the hobby, finding newbie friendly providers who pointed me in the right direction. I have numerous references on eccie and p411, so screening me is a breeze. As a result I dont have to give out RL info. I try to make it as easy for the provider to find out about me as possible, so she can screen me and feel safe and comfortable in seeing me. On the flip side, I only see providers with reviews. I try to stick with eccie and p411 providers but will look at Eros or BP too. However I find them, there still must be reviews. I like to do my homework before going out to play. Also the phone number or email contact info in the ad must match in the reviews. That way I am less likely to meet someone using stolen pics or worse. Safety goes both ways. We all must screen well or else you get burned. In fact the only time I took a chance on an non-reviewed ad, it was B&S. Big fat ugly nasty... Enough said.