Depression & Suicide

After losing the third person in my short 26 years to suicide yesterday, I just wanted to come on here and let everyone know, there is always another option. This is a hard business to be in and I know girls can be depressed and feel lonely. Life is hard. I know men too can feel depressed and lonely. There is always another option.
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
National Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-8255
24 Hour Suicide & Crisis Intervention Hotline http://www.sccenter.org/crisis.html

If you are feeling down and need some help, there are so many resources out there. Call someone who loves you. In the end, you will hurt so many people by taking your own life, including yourself.
If I can help even one person realize it is not worth it to take their own life, I will feel accomplished.
If anyone out there is having these thoughts, reach out, to anyone, myself included. Think before you act. There is no taking it back.

thanks for sharing Jillian.. and well said

Deepest condolences. Admire your approach.

I'm sorry to hear you're going through such a rough time. My best wishes and prayers for you in your time of grief.

Thanks you. I just want to let people know there is another option. And there are people out here who care whether you live or die even if you don't think there is.

Having a good friend that treats you like you were somebody and not just a 60 minute escort is a good starter. There's not much difference between being an escort and a real world girlfriend if you see someone enough times over a long period of time. Its all a matter of how you treat each other.

Sorry to here about your family member.

Great post Jillian and I'm so sorry for your loss. Loneliness can be a bitch sometimes...

loneliness in a crowd is a real bitch

out of the darkness is a great group to become apart of! I agree, suicide can be prevented if we reach out a hand to heal, not hurt. Life is short and nobody deserves to feel like they arent worth while when it is quite the opposite! I support suicide prevention and will always lend a helpful word when i can!

My friends and I do the out of the darkness suicide prevention walk every year for the past 5 years. 5 years ago this month, I lost two of my friends to suicide. And now yesterday, the third. I just want people to know, there is another option. If I can just help one person choose life over death, I feel my friends didn't die for nothing.

My deepest condolences. No one should have to go through such pain. Unfortunately, real life is full of sorrow and happiness. The positive and negative forces are constantly in motion. Human life is extremely fragile. We can take some precautionary steps to prevent such tragedy from happening. The rest is our destiny.

Class post JP and my condolences. In life we have really great and really bad times - neither lasts forever so you just have to press on when the going gets tough.

Hey Jillian, it's nice to know you're as beautiful on the inside as u are on the outside! So sorry for your loss! Suicide isn't the answer....ever! It hurts everyone, speaking from experience!! Take care and God bless!!!

To Jillian;
Even though we've had our personal disagreements, I only ever wanted the best for you. Death always puts things into a fucked up sort of perspective and makes you remember how insignificant the petty dramas that sometimes distracted us truly are. I am sorry to hear that you are suffering another loss after surviving so much in your short time on this earth. You are too young to have so much experience in surviving behind your belt sweetie. You know my number. Use it anytime.

To everyone;
I want to share a post from my old blog that I feel may be appropriate here:

I was one of the 85,000 residents of Dallas who were stuck without electricity all day and night. It sucked. I can’t remember the last time I have gone this long without any form of communication. HOWEVER, at he same time I got to go all day and night without any form of communication. I had some time to myself to contemplate on a few things that have been clouding my head lately. I am going to share the conclusions I came to with you now:First, It is so easy to fall back into living for the shit that doesn’t matter The bills, the petty drama’s, silly high school bs about who said what about who and all that nonsense. We forget about taking the time to notice the shit that really counts. Like getting through a hard day at work so you can Hug your children, or the way the air smells so sweet this time of year first thing in the morning when the dew is still on the honeysuckles. Or whatever it is that fills your soul with that sunshiny feeling. Those things are what we are supposed to focus on and it gets us through the bullshit a lot easier…For most folks it is understandable somewhat when they take life for granted. In a sense, they do not know better. Its always sad to see the tragic stories on the evening news but it’s not real in most of our heads. It will never happen in our worlds where we are safe. But for the ones who have survived traumatic events or near death experiences, we DO know better. We have been faced with the possibility that maybe we were about to have the last moments of our lives. The reality and finalaility of taking your last breathe of precious air. During those moments, you are overwhelmed with so many emotions. Confusion, a moment of realization, fear, panic, desperation, and then at some point your brain takes over in this strange sort of a way and you are suddenly in survival mode. Somehow, you manage to get yourself out of the situation alive. Once the shock wears off and you come back down to earth, you – ok I guess I should say I was faced with a tremendous sense of mortality. I just knew for the first time in my life just how delicate I was and that it truly is a real possibility every day I live that it may be my last day here. I thought a lot about my sister, I still do. About how she died at 22 years old and how final that is. There is no hope of her ever getting to touch her husband or hold her children. Her son wasn’t even 6 months old and her little girl was four. He will never remember how his mommy’s hair smelled and how it felt to fall asleep in her arms. My niece will barely have any memories either. And the part that gets me most is that I could have-NO I SHOULD have been killed too. If that car had been going north instead of southbound, it world have been me who took the impact. That small detail is he only reason I am here now. Well, that and the fact that my job here is not done yet. I still have some work to do before I am ready to say goodbye. GOD TAKES THE ONES THAT ARE READY. I promise.For a long time that awareness, that “eye-opener” was enough for me to make sure I took every chance I could see to enjoy life. To do the things I felt passion for. Or even better the things I have yet to do. For the first time ever I lived instead of surviving like I always had before. The small shit like bills and boyfriends were insignificant to me. After what I had survived, nothing would ever be too difficult. Nothing would ever hurt me like I had already been hurt. Nothing was as horrible as it once seemed. Cause I’d seen worse. I’d gotten through so much harder. But in time, that fades and before you know it you are right back in that place that you used to be in where you can’t see the forest for the trees. Living for the BS. And for what? So you can face your last moments and wonder why you never told someone how much they mean to you or be filled with regret because you didn’t hug your kids enough. Another promise: During the moments before what may be your last, none of the thoughts that go through your mind are about what bill you forgot to pay or what someone you don’t even like may or may not think about you. You really don’t give a fuck about any of that I swear it. I want to say goodbye to this world with a smile from ear to ear dammit. Knowing without a doubt, I lived a good life as a good woman and I have no regrets. I already screwed up the no regrets one but I am working hard to make sure I do the rest.I guess I just felt like sharing this with everyone because maybe it will help someone else who may be in a funk or a sad place to remember what really matters in life. Wake up and be grateful you are blessed with one more day to do all the things you have yet to do or the things you love to do and forget the stupid shit. It will be there another day for you to worry about if you want to. Hug your kids cause you may not have another chance to do that.If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because they are teaching you to love and to open your heart and eyes to little things. Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love, break free and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you. Create your own life, then go out, and live it. And NEVER EVER take your life for granted. It will be your biggest regret if you do."If you take your eyes off your goals, all you see are obstacles."

Very sad to hear, Jillian. Those that do this have no idea how much hurt and pain they cause to the people who care about them.

If only those with suicide tendencies would understand that committing suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.