I don't see a decline. People will use forums as they see fit. Personally, I don't give a shit about how or what I say. I will speak my mind. Besides, a person's board persona doesn't translate into the person's real personality. For someone to be judged by what they say in a forum is foolish. Real personality comes through on 1 to 1 communication. That is where you can tell someone's true character (unless of course they are completely pathological).
Originally Posted by Cpalmson
Let me get this straight:
So what you're saying is speaking your mind and not giving a shit about what you say and how you say is NOT a part of your real personality?
The ideals and viewpoints you have in your real life don't mirror the viewpoints you've expressed here, and this person is a lie?
And doesn't it seem more pathological to create a separate personality online just to be antagonistic, or honest about your feelings?
We all have the manners to meet someone in public, and make a great impression. And I have my favorite board villains as well. Whether I believe some part of themselves aren't alive in some of their postings, is left to be said.
Don't get me wrong, CP. I like you, and have never had any qualms about anything you've said, and I'm mostly speaking in general. But if you were a complete meany on the boards, I would have a hard time believing that you're REALLY (I mean a REAL, died in the wool) a nice person. We all harbor negative thoughts of some kind, and even they don't make you a bad person. In your real life, you may be shy and soft-spoken with a stuttering problem, and everyone could think you're the sweetest person on earth. But in a situation online when you could be nice, and you do the opposite, I can't help but believe someone is not only looking for a little attention but using the board as an outlet to say the negative things on their mind, and an opportunity the be one of the cool kids.
I, personally have never said anything on the board that I wouldn't say to someone's face. I'm pretty sure a couple of fist fights would ensue if I wasn't a woman, but I've been known to hold my own.
I don't comment on subjects where I can't be nice. I don't expect everyone to agree with me, and I'm not always right (I have my off moments
![Mwah1](images/smilies/modern/mwah1.gif)
). Just like in my real life, I'm a no-nonsense person, and I'm not always good about conceding the point in a no-win, can't-fix-stupid situation but I'm working on it. (Some of you have probably seen through my writings and understand why I'm still single.).
Abusers see no problem with hiding behind the anonymity of a board handle and attacking others.
People who utilize them in a positive way use them as a means to connect with someone they might like to interact with, but smart ones make contact in private. Much as we did not share our dirty underwear in public, we do not share our dirty thoughts in a public forum.
Abusers make a lot of show, and help people on both sides of the financial equation know who to avoid, who to not trust.
It is quite eye opening to a poor little boy from the south like me to see such written warfare occuring in public forums, and a lady who let's herself get caught in the crosshairs generally will suffer. Whether it is a feeling from guys that there may be some truth to allegations about the lady or just the drama itself, all of these point to possible lack of discretion on the part of the lady. One way the fallout can occur is that a gal maybe a lovely lady and her rants against a bad hobbyist totally justified, but the next guy will worry that he may innocently violate some rules with the lady and find himself at the mercy of her rants. (Of course, the genders can be swapped, the thought process the same.) With all of the fish in the sea, it is just safer to swim with the dolphins and keep the sharks at bay.
Originally Posted by tigercat
I'm in agreeance with Tigercat with this one. This was eye-opening and intimidating for me too when I discovered the boards. It kept me away for a long time. If anything, I've tried to find the happy medium between being a post whore and staying out of the drama.
As far as the OP's question about the new wave in social media, it would have to be a LOT more private than this.