Time for another Public Service Announcement about checking references via text

Ladies, if a fellow provider doesn't publish her number in her ads or showcase:
IT'S NOT SAFE TO TEXT HER FOR A REFERENCE!!!!!

Robby Rapist could give you anyone's number and say it's so and so provider. Hell, he could even be the one texting you. How would you know???

Always Always Always check references via pm if you don't already know the provider's number or she doesn't list it in her ads (even then I would still pm so she knows it's me contacting her).

Gentlemen, if our number is not listed in our showcase or ads then please do not give it out to others. Help the new ladies develop good safety habits.

That concludes this PSA reminder. Thank you for your time.

Yourhottnurse,
Jaime
Good points.

Terribly indiscreet for a hobbyist to text any provider AT ANY TIME FOR ANY REASON...

(unless within a window of time that he's 100% certain that it's OK to do so to confirm or set an appointment, get final directions, etc.)

Seems that general principle would be ESPECIALLY TRUE for reference requests and the like.

Also:

If a gent sees a lady once for an appointment, and plans to see her again, it's smart to ask specifically what her favored method of future communication is. Although some providers might be OK with texting at almost any time; many others most definitely are not.

And, as the Hott Nurse points out, someone receiving a text has no idea who might be at the other end. Even if the number seems familiar, phones do get stolen, commandeered by SOs (or potentially even LE agencies), etc.
Excellent points.

Thank you Ex-CEO
Thank you doll. I JUST had this exact thing happen to me. Totally ticked me off as I have mentioned this in previous posts and tell my friends to have a lady pm me for a reference. I HATE my number given out. Guys our privacy and protection is every bit as important as yours. Please be respectful of that. Would you want us giving your number to a BSC hooker that you don't know? Respect is a two way street.
Biggest pet peeve: when an old client gives my number out to providers to use me as a reference check. I don't post my number on my ads, so why give it out? Common sense....
jdkees's Avatar
In today's Internet of Things™ and tons of different communications devices and methods, it's not like setting up a small and simple way to communicate between providers can't be developed without running afoul of anyone. This seems a ridiculous problem to have considering the glut of solutions out there.

For example:

I hear there's a ladies only section not unlike the Men's Lounge here. That's the perfect place to create a sticky thread with contact info. This would be even better if the contact method were consistent between everyone too.

Best case is if all involved chose to use a secure messaging service like Wickr ( https://www.wickr.com/ ) and only those in the ladies private area would have access to the list of accounts. What's more, if one account becomes publicly known or whatever, a new username on the service can be quickly created to replace it and maintain the privacy of communication between providers and reduce harassment.

Then when a hobbyist shares their references, the provider simply goes to the list of other providers, gets their Wickr ID, and shoots them a message asking for verification. Since services like Wickr have self-destruct messages a provider doesn't get forced to deal with a massive queue of messages and I'm sure a reasonable/rational time limit can be agreed on by providers for when to count a non-response to an inquiry as a non-confirmation.

That's just me spitballing an on-the-fly answer to this particular complaint (using a tool I'm familiar with), and that's really just a quick exercise in the problem solving. It might not be good enough or address all the needs, but that's because I'm not spending the time doing discovery and assessment first. But this isn't exactly unsolvable using available tools.
Kayleehotchick's Avatar
When a guy gives me a providers number, I next to NEVER text her.

Normally, I google the number and contact her via pm if I can. Much much safer that way.

Also ladies, have the guy send you a pm to verify his handle. If he refuses to, send his butt packing....

Not all money is good money.
bojulay's Avatar
Wow!

You would think common sense would tell someone that.

Two fisted slap for the idiots of the world.
As a client, if you plan to use a provider as a reference, ASK her first if it's o.k. to do so. ASK her how she would prefer to be contacted by other providers checking references. ASK her how long to allow for her to respond to that request. ASK if there is something specific the other provider should mention about you to ensure she remembers who you are . ASK, you stupid, fucking, morons. Make it easy for a gal to give a good reference and your far more likely to get it.
I have been asked and I really REALLY appreciate them asking. I politely explain why I would prefer not and they are very accommodating about it.

I understand how easy it is just to innocently pass along a number you have for professional purposes. The thing is though, some people are not professional.

Pming is the best way until screening is done and an agreement to meet is set. No exceptions.
<heavysigh.org>
AbbyNicole's Avatar
Wow!!! In two years, I haven't had this issue. It's happened TWICE this week!!! My number is NEVER given until screening is done and we set a date. I only text ladies for a reference if she is someone I have met and trust, like you THN ;-). Discretion and privacy are PRIORITY!!! Stay safe!!! Xoxo
I will admit that I do kinda flip my shit when a client has given out my number to a provider for a reference.

It's different if they are a provider that already has my number since I have contacted her previously.
BBW Katrina's Avatar
I don't respond to reference requests via text or phone call. I had a wife text me once from her husbands phone that she had apparently gotten a hold of. I assumed it was him, but I soon found out it wasn't. Not good for him or I. Had to change my #. He was a dumbass for allowing that to happen. PM's only ladies!! We can then be assured discretion is in play. Anyone could be texting you...
Red_Headed_Julie's Avatar
I never post my number, and never respond to texts. All my profiles say to email or PM me and that I never call or text. I too get very upset when someone gives out my number. I do not give out the clients' numbers, I would expect the same amount of mutual respect.

I am always fast to respond to reference requests and am more than happy to help anyone out, but be respectful!