Are the young becoming more acceptable of May-December relationships?

Whispers's Avatar
I go out a lot with young women in my company.

Many of the places I frequent tend to cater to the older and more successful male and it is not uncommon to see a young lady on their arm.

But in other settings you can often catch that disapproving stare. Especially mid range dining establishments.

Usually from older people. Well. Usually from an older lady and a lecherous look from an older man.

I've noticed however that in some settings where I expected to be "out of place" or feel uncomfortable that we seemed much more accepted then expected.

I attended a friend's gathering at a local club recently to celebrate an occasion. It was an all "civilian" gathering of mid twenty to mid thirty year old.

I wasn't sure when I was invited if a date was appropriate and although there was a slight hesitation in his voice he said to go ahead and bring her knowing she was only 21.

It was a great time without a single issue and when I asked afterwards he said no one brought it up at all.

I was the oldest and she was the youngest in the place. And no one seemed to think anything of it.

I guess the "younger generations" are becoming much more accepting and less concerned with how two people are involved with each other than my generation.
Whispers's Avatar
I'm interested in hearing a buddies thoughts as he was one very much opposed to seeing a certain young lady I introduced him to because she was so much younger than his average girl (still old enough though). It was something he could not come to grasp with 10 months ago. Now she's a regular in his lineup.
austinkboy's Avatar
All i am going to say is... guilty as charged. My only excuse... she is a year older than when I first met her.

On the other subject matter of being in public with a younger girl. hmmm, i have been in a few awkward situations, but mostly i don't care what the older women in family restaurants think. The nicer restaurants, I just write it off to the fact that a lot of the well to do older women there probably were gold diggers themselves when younger, and now just only wish they still had it. They are probably not disapproving of me so much as imagining their spouses with a young girl at a fancy restaurant. The men of course, are just googling and salivating, and I don't mean over the appetizers.

While I do worry about being seen or recognized by someone I know, in general, it doesn't bother me as long as my date is not uncomfortable. If I feel that she is uncomfortable being seen with a much older man, then I am a bit self conscious... but otherwise, I am pretty good at tuning people out. Being a natural romantic, I just concentrate on my date who is usually a much prettier sight and better conversation than the general public. I just say silly things like... "you know I love you, right?" (I learned that from a buddy of mine.)

Although, one date I had, I had a real hard time concentrating and conversing. I was being rubbed the right way under the table cloth slowly for the good part of an hour. I was sure everyone in the whole place was watching me...I didn't eat much.
sixxbach's Avatar

I've noticed however that in some settings where I expected to be "out of place" or feel uncomfortable that we seemed much more accepted then expected.

I attended a friend's gathering at a local club recently to celebrate an occasion. It was an all "civilian" gathering of mid twenty to mid thirty year old.

I wasn't sure when I was invited if a date was appropriate and although there was a slight hesitation in his voice he said to go ahead and bring her knowing she was only 21.

It was a great time without a single issue and when I asked afterwards he said no one brought it up at all.

I was the oldest and she was the youngest in the place. And no one seemed to think anything of it.

I guess the "younger generations" are becoming much more accepting and less concerned with how two people are involved with each other than my generation. Originally Posted by Whispers
I would very much agree that "younger generations" are becoming less concerned with how people are involved. My mother was 27 when she met my dad at 19! My estranged spouse is 4 years older than me. One of the couples there had an age difference too. The guy is 41 and the younger lady is 25. They also remember when I dated someone closer to 21 than 25 not too long ago. You have to be an open minded individual to be a friend of mine lol

I think with all the problems out there in this world, things such as age differences are petty. Those that judge people like that should look in the mirror

sixx
nuglet's Avatar
Interesting question Whispers. I'm not all "that" old, but there's a 22 yr age difference between my wife and I. We, (she and I) never thought much about it when we met several yrs ago, even her parents didn't seem disturbed. I admit I waited about 1.5 yrs to meet them, because I was certain some "judgements" would surface... but didn't happen.
When we first met, most of my friends gave me a hard time because she looks several years younger than her actual age and some of my close associates thought I was dating a teenager.. not true, but I saw no reason to respond, or justify..
Mokoa's Avatar
  • Mokoa
  • 11-25-2011, 12:56 PM
Yes, the more recent generations are a lot more tolerant of such things. However, the older generations are still not. I, too, have seen the stares and glances. I just smile back. Drives them nuts.
I prefer dating younger guys (within reason), but only if they have the intellectual stamina to keep up with me. I'm not willing to be bored by anyone, no matter how attractive they are :P
Whispers's Avatar
I, too, have seen the stares and glances. I just smile back. Drives them nuts. Originally Posted by Mokoa
That it does.... In many situations I have no problem with the attention so long as it does not bother the young lady with me.
happybanana's Avatar
as my SO is 11 years my senior, and we have been together for 23 years, i understand the issues that come up with either party being older or younger. But as there is a VAST difference between physical age and mental age, I always thought the later was more important...
nutinmuch's Avatar
I love the "older lady" stares of disapproval and the families out together. You can just read their minds, the mom hates me (yes, I keep my wedding ring on), the dad is jealous as hell, the kids just ignore. My gf is 30 years younger than my S.O. and I love it!
austinkboy's Avatar
I have dinner plans tonight with a beautiful young lady. I am definitely hoping for some stares. I will definitely have to grin back.
westex69's Avatar
Walked into a Dennys in Dallas a while back with a hot chesty Latina, 25 years younger at least, felt like a hundered eyes glued to us
I get a thrill from the attention when I'm out with an older gentleman. It drives people nuts when their stares or pointed looks are ignored and we are obviously enjoying each other's company.
I feel the most non-verbal communication from waitresses (my age, usually), and generally I get a "get it, girl" vibe from them.
Many of my friends' parents have a lot of years between them, and the crowd I run in is generally accepting, so age isn't much of a factor. More likely to be joked about to ease the tension, and then its over.
I love seeing interracial/cross-generational relationships! My first boyfriend was 40 years older and white. As you can imagine we got some looks dancing together in a hip-hop club but we were actually local-celebrity famous and our love was applauded by most, we ignored the others.
westex69's Avatar
Yea Layla, I took an older hot black lady dancing at an after work function years ago, from then on the VP of the company on down thought I was the coolest, was not sure how it would go over with a bunch of conservative corp guys but it was a blast and I was well known from then on ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,