Why Is It So Tough To Walk Away From This Hobby?

Just a brief history, I joined ECCIE in 2012. I managed to stay away (retired) for almost 2 years. During my retirement, I got bored and decided to login to my account. I was so overwhelmed when I saw countless PMs from fellow hobbyists and providers. Many of them asked if I plan to come back or not.

I started responding to some of them. I decided to visit one of my favorite providers. All of the sudden, I got hooked again. Sometimes I would see a couple ladies on the same day. I was so into this hobby that $ was just an afterthought. It’s really an addiction. I want to quit, but it’s nearly impossible. I have tried dating several times, but that also failed. I dated one of the providers who had enough of this hobby. We got along well for the first few months. Then I got tired of our relationship.

I’m dating again now. That’s why I haven’t reviewed lately. However, the urge to come back is so unbearable.

I would appreciate your thoughts and opinions on this topic. Is there a better way to walk away?

Thanks!

Y&M

"""there's only one way out"""" LOL -- Answer primal needs- in our DNA just saying

Sex is one of our most deeply-ingrained needs. When that drive is pushing you to do something you don't want to do, then you have a problem. Why do you think sex offenders have such an insanely high recidivism rate? Because their most basic need is pushing them to do something that'll get them locked up for years. Real, legitimate mental health professionals don't have an answer on this beyond "try to take your mind off it." I guarantee the answer isn't on this board.

You have to fill your time with something else. I was in the same boat as you. There were times I saw up to 8 ladies over a 3 day weekend, and $ was an afterthought. I don't know how I threw so much $ around. I've picked up a part time job to occupy my time, THAT has helped. I still do get my rocks off, but it's few and far between these days. Also, I have so much residual $, that I've developed a new hobby, traveling. Also, any appt I make and BS pops up, I don't have any issue driving away. Hope this helps

With all due respect, I think the FIRST thing you need to do is stay away from this board. Maybe ask the admins to delete your account.

That said, sex addiction (of this type) is one of the easiest addictions to get over. There's no physical withdraw symptoms you have do deal with like you do with drugs. Just gotta set your mind to it.

Just a brief history, I joined ECCIE in 2012. I managed to stay away (retired) for almost 2 years. During my retirement, I got bored and decided to login to my account. I was so overwhelmed when I saw countless PMs from fellow hobbyists and providers. Many of them asked if I plan to come back or not.

I started responding to some of them. I decided to visit one of my favorite providers. All of the sudden, I got hooked again. Sometimes I would see a couple ladies on the same day. I was so into this hobby that $ was just an afterthought. It’s really an addiction. I want to quit, but it’s nearly impossible. I have tried dating several times, but that also failed. I dated one of the providers who had enough of this hobby. We got along well for the first few months. Then I got tired of our relationship.

I’m dating again now. That’s why I haven’t reviewed lately. However, the urge to come back is so unbearable.

I would appreciate your thoughts and opinions on this topic. Is there a better way to walk away?

Thanks!

Y&M Originally Posted by You&Me

Y&M,

You've dicked down some of the hottest women on this board!

I've thought before, "okay, this will be the last one."

Then she was so fucking hot & amazing, I had to try one more and go back and see one I met previously again...AND again !

There's always one more one more!

Sex isn't an addition. You like T&A and that's okay!

You have to fill your time with something else. I was in the same boat as you. There were times I saw up to 8 ladies over a 3 day weekend, and $ was an afterthought. I don't know how I threw so much $ around. I've picked up a part time job to occupy my time, THAT has helped. I still do get my rocks off, but it's few and far between these days. Also, I have so much residual $, that I've developed a new hobby, traveling. Also, any appt I make and BS pops up, I don't have any issue driving away. Hope this helps Originally Posted by mrredcat43

This approach actually helps to a certain point. Staying occupied with something else does help. I need to travel more for sure. Staying here in Dallas will get me hooked with these hot babes no doubt.

Thanks for sharing your thought.

If you quit, send your bank and credit card account details to me.

I would say that as men, for whatever reason, there's something about the allure (especially here) about having sex with a woman that you don't "really" have to put the time in to know on a personal level.

Multiply that with the fact that everyone's financial situation is different, and every man's libido is different, and you get the majority of men here. I would say at least 50% of the men here have some sort of SO (regardless of the intimacy level) but here some of them are...ironically because of in some cases, the lack of sex / intimacy.


Say what you will about Kanye West, but he had a CLASSIC line:

"See, I could have me a good girl
And still be addicted to them hood rats"


I know for me, I look at a donation and money in general as a replenishable resource, so the fact that I get to have fun with a woman that essentially, and in the long run financially, cost me relatively nothing, is enough to keep me around, regardless if I had a SO. I genuinely enjoy fucking period, so I don't or wouldn't think of this as an addiction, but rather, an outlet for me to enjoy myself the way I see fit.



In terms of it being tough to walk away from this, I would first ask,

"Does this truly make me happy?"

"What brought me back to this?"

"What made me retire in the first place?"





As previously suggested, having something to occupy your time in a non-sexual way can definitely help.


Just my .02

Y&M - Buddy Buddy Buddy !! SMH !!
Why would you want to go away from all these lovely ladies on here ? These beautiful and lovely women who have given us so much pleasure !!

Yes - I can understand. Sometimes you feel as if you are done with all this, but as rexdutchman rightly put it, "Primal Needs" is what keeps us wanting more !!
And, I guess to control the Hobby urge, you need to be a Man of strong personality and will power !! Look at me - I haven't hobbied for almost a month now !! But, I'm not saying I'm strong !! The lure of a good woman is much much more stronger, believe me !!

But, Eccie ladies surely need you !!

I’m dating again now. That’s why I haven’t reviewed lately. However, the urge to come back is so unbearable. Originally Posted by You&Me

you did review earlier this month, so that's too recent to consider it as a "layoff".. I think I had 2 layoffs of a couple of months since I joined, and never figured that was any sign of impending retirement.


you've seen a lot of ladies, way more than me (in less time, considering the 2 years away), and I find it hard to imagine seeing more than I'm doing. redcat's response is as good as can be offered, I think. just try to find other things to occupy your time and mind.

I have also had similar thoughts, Y&M.

What keeps me in check is knowing the difference between a hobby and an obsession.

Hobby is “Something you enjoy and do with acceptable risk whenever you find some free time and money.” Big head drives hobby related activities.

Obsession is “That very Hobby you want to keep doing, even if you don’t have free time and money and/or you disregard risk.” Little head tends to drive these obsessions.

Perfectly nailed it mate !! What a Definition !! Simple and Clear !!

Hobby is “Something you enjoy and do with acceptable risk whenever you find some free time and money.” Big head drives hobby related activities.

Obsession is “That very Hobby you want to keep doing, even if you don’t have free time and money and/or you disregard risk.” Little head tends to drive these obsessions. Originally Posted by Bonferroni

Y&M - Buddy Buddy Buddy !! SMH !!
Why would you want to go away from all these lovely ladies on here ? These beautiful and lovely women who have given us so much pleasure !!

Yes - I can understand. Sometimes you feel as if you are done with all this, but as rexdutchman rightly put it, "Primal Needs" is what keeps us wanting more !!
And, I guess to control the Hobby urge, you need to be a Man of strong personality and will power !! Look at me - I haven't hobbied for almost a month now !! But, I'm not saying I'm strong !! The lure of a good woman is much much more stronger, believe me !!

But, Eccie ladies surely need you !! Originally Posted by ScrewDriver01

Seriously, I have thought about quitting this hobby altogether. However, I kept asking myself what would I do if I want something different. My quick answer or temporary relief is this damn hobby. And it’s relatively safe too. However, with the new laws I always have that concern about the whole hobby business.

I will go slow for sure from now on. I hope to gradually step out of this hobby in the foreseeable future.

Thanks for your thought SD!

I have also had similar thoughts, Y&M.

What keeps me in check is knowing the difference between a hobby and an obsession.

Hobby is “Something you enjoy and do with acceptable risk whenever you find some free time and money.” Big head drives hobby related activities.

Obsession is “That very Hobby you want to keep doing, even if you don’t have free time and money and/or you disregard risk.” Little head tends to drive these obsessions. Originally Posted by Bonferroni

Very well stated, Bonferroni! Thank you!