A little "Hobby 101" primer for newer hobbysist and lurker waiting to take the plunge.
Nothing earth shattering, just some tips all in one place, culled from trial and error, TOFTT, good luck, bag luck and everything in between. Fell free to add on...
1. Don’t mention you saw her ad! Many ads, in and of themselves, are straight up offers of prostitution, if she is LE and you mention you saw the ad, you know the one of the coochie spread or banana up her ass with the title "Mrs. Good head", try to explain later that you did not know what she was really offering.
2. If she asks how you heard about her, tell her a friend and immediately start talking about something you know from the review you read, "he said you really like Siamese cats", "you have the cutest smile" (from her pics). Don’t let her dwell on how you got the number. It's not like she hasn’t put it all over the net, so it's not like she is going to be persistent about it.
Don't discuss rates or activities. Do your homework! If she insists on discusing them move on. She is a security risk to you, even if she is not LE, she is young/dumb/being pimped/attracting unwanted attention that you don't need to be associated with. It's a sure sign of provider immaturity and almost guarantees a SW type of encounter.
3. If she asks who your friend is, make up a name, then pause and say, you know he probably did not tell you his real name anyway. If she asks again, tell her about mid 40's a little out of shape, thinning hair, she will have to know someone like that she has seen in the last 24-48 hrs!
4. If she asks what you are looking for, give her time frame instead. "I have some time to kill this afternoon and wanted to see if we could get together for about an hour". Personally, I like to avoid the words "appointment" and "session".
5. Always get the room. If it's your room, you control the environment. It minimizes surprises. She comes to you, you can watch her pull in and get out, make sure she is solo etc, looks like her pictures etc. LE will rarely let a female enter a room solo for her safety. You also don’t have to worry about a pimp having another key and coming in unexpectedly. If you are worried about using your ID, you can try telling the clerk you don’t have it with you, and hand him another $20 (this seems to work less now with new city regulations in place for hotels)
6. If you must go to her, get there early and check out the vicinity for thugs, marked LE cars, unmarked LE cars or wrecker trucks in the area, esp. ones from the city. What do you think they are going to do with your car after they bust you? Check out the room, ask to use the restroom and make sure no one is in there. It’s easier to run now than when naked.
7. If robbed give up the money! It's not worth it.
8. Get the room for longer than you need it, this will come in to play because many girls will show up late and you don’t want to run out of time, because the manager WILL start banging on the door after a phone call to the room. Also, in the event the session runs over, you are covered. This gives you time to shower before and after too.
9. Leave all valuables at home or the office, or at least in your car, including your wallet and extra $$.
I bring a little extra in 10's, and keep it out of site, just in case time runs over or a menu option is offered that I might want. That gives me the option to say, “that is all I have”, or get my second stash of cash.
Leave your personal cell phone too, you don’t want a chick getting a hold of your friends and families number should it get stolen.
10. I am paranoid, but I have a second full change of clothes on my car. In the rare event she grabs your slacks and bolts, thinking your wallet is in there, or, if you ignored #6, and had to hightail it out of her room on the fly, you can at least get to your car and have something to wear.
11. People are concerned about getting the room in their name. I think that risk is less than others.
12. When she comes in, have the $$ in plain view, so she at least knows you have it. Most chicks will see it, but not acknowledge it. I don’t have it obvious; more like I emptied a bunch of crap from my pockets and the money is just part of it. I also leave any doors open so she knows no one else is hiding in the room, this includes the shower curtain. You want to minimize the BS that could be on her mind.
13. If they ever blurt out what do you want to do, or “do you want a BJ”, “do you have a condom”, “let me get a condom”, immediately say “no, there must be a mistake, I just wanted you to dance for me”. There nothing illegal about dancing (don’t say stripping). Any chick can dance, and if she won’t, how good was her service going to be anyway?
Answering an explicit ad, and showing up with $$ are often enough to bust you in some locales, and enough for you to take a ride in others. Why risk it?
I have a CD of strip cub songs I bring with me, even if you don’t use it for this purpose, most of this girls did, or do dance and that itself can be exciting. Many PI's and SI's have a CD player in the room.
This may seem silly to some, but you need to cover your ass if she is LE. They really want to get you to verbally agree without asking you if "you want to fuck". Indirect questions often catch even savvy guys off guard. Don’t play word games or get witty with the innuendo. Simply say "no". At the recent social bust, a gent was propositioned by the female vice cop. He basically told her no thanks and walked away a free man. Twelve other poor SOB's did not. Don’t let words get in the way. Why discuss what is already known??
14. Get her dancing and see how she responds to you, touching, feeling, let your hands do some walking in appropriate places first. LE is not going to be groped solo in a hotel room by you.
15. Proceed with legal contact, massage, kissing and see how she responds.
16. At this point everyone should be comfortable and the fun can commence.
17. Remember to shower afterward and dispose of all evidence, empty every pocket! DO a quick check in the mirror for scratch marks,bites,glitter, etc. You want to leave no traces.
18. Don’t ever just bring one cover, you never know if you might need more and don’t trust her to have one. Small single use lubes are handy as well. Just avoid having a whole "sex kit", if hassled (vs. busted) by LE you don’t want to give them anymore reason to keep hassling you. If you are in a relationship, throw away or give to the girl any unused cover/lubes etc. They are dirt cheap and not worth hiding for the S.O. to find. Towelettes from BBQ places make great last minute cleanup items and are innocous enough to have if some one finds them in your cars console.
19. Take the comforter off the bed and just get on the sheets. The sheets are washed, well washed waaay more often than the comforter is taken to the dry cleaners! Everyone wants to lie on top of the comforter for fear of the sheets. It’s the other way around.
20. Always have a reason to be on the side of town you are on if you have an S.O. Yeah, you need to lie about why, but it's easier to lie if you get towed or in a wreck and have to call her, than it will be to explain why you are not playing golf 30 miles away like you said you would be.