All work and, well, mostly play:)

How does your hobby change when you're actually into a client? It's a business I get that, but a business that involves people with emotions, wants, desires and attractions. In my line of work I go above and beyond to keep a client happy when I really enjoy working with them. There are things I'll do to keep them as customers that I won't do for others and I'm sure the same is true for them as well.

So for you ladies; To the type of man that makes you feel like you're not working, the type that you want to come back because its fun and exciting for you, one that you're attracted to or makes you feel comfortable in your own skin or whatever. What changes in the business dynamic, how do you incentivise his return?

To the fellas; Are there expectations you have when there is "obvious*" chemistry or you feel you are a providers "atf*"?

*this might be a hard one cause with the good ones it's damn near impossible to tell
Who's Your Daddy's Avatar
That's a good question. I think both the guy and gal knows when they are the ATF. You can't deny good chemistry and many return visits proves it.
ozmosys's Avatar
Can't speak for being a provider's ATF. I'm as plain as an old shoe, and not particularly skillful. If I was, I probably wouldn't be seeing providers.

And when a provider is my ATF, I probably get too enthusiastic in ways that she secretly wishes that I wouldn't. But who knows. Nobody's clairvoyant, and it's probably not a good business model to communicate honestly.

I've found that my ATF is usually the one that I'm with at any given moment. It's a love affair that lasts exactly one hour, so there's no real surprises.
I hear ya, I just find it hard to believe it's all business all the time... I myself do have reasonable expectations of an atf and if they aren't met then I look for someone else to fill the role.
Whispers's Avatar
Do you really expect ladies to feed into a thread where admitting anything along these lines would garner them attention from those seeking longer sessions, free time and some sort of "relationship"?

They want EVERY client to leave thinking they are "into them" so describing anything less than what some other client experiences will cost them that guy's business......

They are as into you as you can AFFORD for them to be and as often as you can AFFORD for them to be so.

The only thing return visits demonstrate is a provider is good at her job and a guy enjoys her performance.

Don't forget... It IS a PERFORMANCE......
Curious if you have tried to schedule since starting this thread ?
Do you really expect ladies to feed into a thread where admitting anything along these lines would garner them attention from those seeking longer sessions, free time and some sort of "relationship"?

They want EVERY client to leave thinking they are "into them" so describing anything less than what some other client experiences will cost them that guy's business......

They are as into you as you can AFFORD for them to be and as often as you can AFFORD for them to be so.

The only thing return visits demonstrate is a provider is good at her job and a guy enjoys her performance.

Don't forget... It IS a PERFORMANCE...... Originally Posted by Whispers
Well said, all valid points I failed to consider.
Curious if you have tried to schedule since starting this thread ? Originally Posted by rockerrick
No, though I don't see how this thread would have a negative impact on my hobbying. I, myself, am not seeking free time, longer sessions, or a relationship, if the first two happen then cool but it's not an expectation. There are ways to incentivise free trade while meeting the bottom line, economics 101, whispers comment solidified this sentiment.
Bolstered by my second glass of red wine, I will dive into this one ;-)

First of all, for many women (including myself), it IS NOT always 'business all the time'. Sometimes, it is - and it really isn't anyone's fault. Sometimes there isn't that chemistry or spark, or a bad case of nerves for one or the other. I recently had a client who I found very attractive, he was very kind but I felt I failed him because his day job was one of my favorite fetishes - and I was intimidated. Dumb, right?

One thing that I strongly feel can't be underestimated when a man and woman meet, is the role of pheromones. Scientific research states that it is a HUGE factor in attraction. We could literally be looking at someone who is our physical ideal and if they don't 'smell' right to us, then it is difficult to generate that strong sense of attraction. OTOH, I have met men that were not 'my type' physically - but, that 'smell' thing kicked in (I usually notice it in their skin/breath, fyi) and I am dumbstruck with desire. Same applies for men in and out of the hobby.

We all have our 'type' that would turn our head if we were walking through a mall, in a restaurant or passing on the street. Maybe it is a color of eyes, freckles, hair color and so on. Maybe there is a fixation on someone who reminds us of our 'first love'.

I personally like men who have eyes that 'sparkle' when they smile or talk. I LOVE dimples to the point of embarrassing myself, I LOVE blue eyes and I can trace those preferences back to a place in time.

If a client and I have that hormonal-based + smell + quirky attraction to a feature chemistry then it is more than just 'business only'. When I was 30, I knew this to be true, but now, at 50, I KNOW this a part of my sexuality and arousal.

As a side note *and yes, then I will go back to my corner * - I am an actress/singer and one of the biggest motivations I have for getting on stage and baring my soul and ass to the wind, is that my audience feel I am performing for them. Individually. I want each person to feel I am standing in front of them while I pour out my song or lines. I want them to be moved, motivated, stirred from within because my focus was on them and something I did resonated in their soul. That is a GREAT thing - not a bad thing. So, if you diminish what a provider does by considering it all 'acting' - I ask you to consider why you go see a film or musical? Do you REALLY think porn actresses make those same noises at home w/ their BF? uh...no.
If a provider is an actress then it is because we WANT you to feel special and that you are the focus of our attention. It is a gift we give - not a form of hype.

There is a good thread re: this on the Main Discussion board, fyi...

Ok...I hope this made sense. Night fellas!



~A~
knotty man's Avatar
lol. usually when the "smell" thing kicks in . it usually means i shouldve taken some beano before the date.
my pheromones are kickin right after a grilled steak burrito!!
austin_191967's Avatar
I've found that my ATF is usually the one that I'm with at any given moment. It's a love affair that lasts exactly one hour, so there's no real surprises. Originally Posted by ozmosys
+1!

Do you really expect ladies to feed into a thread where admitting anything along these lines would garner them attention from those seeking longer sessions, free time and some sort of "relationship"?

They want EVERY client to leave thinking they are "into them" so describing anything less than what some other client experiences will cost them that guy's business......

They are as into you as you can AFFORD for them to be and as often as you can AFFORD for them to be so.

The only thing return visits demonstrate is a provider is good at her job and a guy enjoys her performance.

Don't forget... It IS a PERFORMANCE...... Originally Posted by Whispers
Excellent analysis. Couldn't agree more.
Having been a Non-FS provider for 90% of the time that I've been in the hobby...it was easy to have very clear boundaries with clients. However, when other services are provided, sometimes those boundaries do get blurred. It's only human nature.

I'm sure you gentlemen would be surprised to find out that it's not all an "act". We are human after all...
austin_191967's Avatar
I'm sure you gentlemen would be surprised to find out that it's not all an "act". We are human after all... Originally Posted by Leslie Lane 1

Yes, I would be surprised if it wasn't all an "act", at least with me. I'm sure there are some providers that find their clients attractive and have a connection with them. It's just not a problem I think I will ever have to worry about! lol
There are many different connections that can be made beyond the sexual or physical. Some of the more meaningful connections I've made in the hobby extend beyond the superficial...and gear more toward human/emotional connections. I consider myself fortunate because of this.

*Austiny...I've seen you. And quite frankly sir, you're wrong.
austin_191967's Avatar

*Austiny...I've seen you. And quite frankly sir, you're wrong. Originally Posted by Leslie Lane 1

Awww. I'm blushing. Thanks.