The Man: After having poured through every detail of his many excursions with the superior sex, I should feel jealous. However, knowing I have entered his lion's den and emerged with nary a scratch, I will share that my time spent with The Great Justin_Scott has me humbled and tickled pink at the same time. For I now know that he possesses the depth and profundity of The Great Mufasa, with the lustrous mane of a fully-matured and confident Simba. Such regality in his image can cloak what I have learned are his most endearing qualities: a borderline-OCD introspective nature, full of insanely-human self-doubt, balanced with the child-like joy of self-discovery. May he never change in these respects.
That being said, I wasn't his first great review, and I may not be his last. However, with his permission, it is my great honor and privilege to issue a first review of his legendary chronicles...
The Author: One can't stop reading his past works, which are based on his personal exploits with an equisitely unique harem of beautiful (and bountiful) ladies. As readers, we ebb and flow with his moods, his desires, and his every move, causing one to wonder where our own beliefs end and Justin_Scott's begin. Where JS takes his audience, all opposing voices quickly fade away as they buy into his fantasy world. In fact, one might argue that there is grounds for research and case studies into his occult-like following, which includes varied mindsets that would not normally be in agreement. He is the calculating salesman that delivers his pitch while nodding his head with a smile, eliciting an affirmative (and fully expected) response from his mark. When under Mr. Scott's literary spell, a hobbyist's brain is susceptible to accept any and all of his utterances as universal truths. If the great Justin_Scott paints it as fact, it may as well have been said by Oprah Winfrey herself to a crowd of self-help-crazed, stay-at-home-moms who are trying to embrace their inner spirit...
One thing is glaringly obvious here: Jeff Foxworthy needs to meet Justin_Scott. This critic envisions a beautiful collaboration which yields an ongoing Series of Grammy-Award-winning recordings entitled, "You Might Be A JS Fanatic If..." (...given a choice between a lifetime of freebies with your ATF or a copy of JS's uncensored personal journal, you'd immediately organize an ECCIE search party for your missing reading glasses...)
Speaking of...has anybody seen mine?
*squint squint*