You are sick? Or she/he calls and says she's sick

atlcomedy's Avatar
I've been more active on the board than usual today because well I woke up with an awful cold this morning (& have had more time than I planned on to do mindless stuff like surf the internet) I'm sure I'll be fine in a day or two. In fact I doubt I'm contagious. But I feel like crap and I look like crap and I'm sure no one really wants to be around me and my box of tissues. So I cancelled all my in person (civie) appointments for today. Even if I'm not contagious I'm not sure my business partners/clients would want me around.

This is cold and flu season. It happens. So open question: how do you handle it (guy or gal) if you have an appointment scheduled and you wake up ill? No one is going to admit on here to going thru with the appointment

but how do you handle it? Do you offer to pay for the appointment anyway? Do you demand (ask for) a cancellation fee? Do you think they are full of shit and just trying to back out of a date? etc. etc.

Obviously this all varies based on the situation (& history with the person if there is one)....there is no one size fits all...so open topic...
I had this happen to me TWICE last year at the same "traveling InCall location". First time it was because I had someone get a little too physically rough with me and I just needed to shut down and go home. I messaged everyone and told them the truth "I was ok, but sadly someone was an A-hole with big hands and I needed to go home". They all responded back to confirm I didn't need anything and we left it at that.

The next time I was scheduled to go back, I emailed every single person I canceled on to let them know my schedule so they could have 1st dibs on time slots. After 3 days, I then posted publicly.

Guess what! The day after I showed up I woke up feeling like hell. &%$!
I emailed everyone again profusely apologizing and let them know I was sick. Turns out, I got hit with the flu and strep and was out for 2 weeks. I'm very active on Twitter so I kept updates going on there while I was sick. I wanted them to see that I wasn't flaking.

So FINALLY after I had recovered I emailed every single one of them who I had to cancel on TWICE and let them know I was going to set up a short InCall near where I had originally intended to stay. (needed to reset the ju-ju)

Again, I gave about 3 days of letting them respond 1st and then opened it up publicly. I won't lie, I was nervous because I had to cancel TWICE for the same locations but thankfully my reputation is strong enough to where I didn't have anyone get hotly with me.

Didn't think to offer any discounts but I did make sure I kept track of each person. I think there are a few who just never even tried for the 3rd time to reschedule. It happens and I just had to look at it as bad luck/timing and DAMNIT, i'm human! Not a robot sex pot.
thebuffmantraples's Avatar
Had a checkout person sicker then heck, sneazing and generally spewing his sickness at humanity, checking my stuff through an snotted over all my things.

I was going to be occupying space near 1year olds or younger. the parents were going to handle the stuff I purchased. Should have just left everything at the counter and left. I decided to just sanitize the stuff and my hands/arms since it was on me already.

Probably the last time I forgive that kind of behavior.
Let's just say that person could have been left in the back of the store at least!

I did inform everyone about what happened and to keep or chunk what was brought in. They didn't trash the stuff!
If you are sick stay home or at least help everyone stay safe from you.

That's how I feel about it.
but that does not give you the excuse to be inconsiderate. If one of the two parties has to cancel the appointment it is on them to make it right. No matter what the circumstances. When determining what is the appropriate compensation there are many things to be considered. How much time was reserved for you? How much notice were you able to give? Was there any type of cancellation policy in place when you booked? Even with no policy it is a fair and kind gesture to to make it up to the other person.
If I had to cancel the same day then I would give free time to my date as soon as possible. Something along the lines of an additional free hour or two depending on the time booked. If I cancelled with absolutely no time for him to find someone else then the next date would be totally free. Yes, even if I got in a car accident on the way to the appointment.
I would expect the same kind of manners from the gentleman who cancelled on me. I don't always get it, and I cannot enforce it, but it is the right thing to do. Same day cancellations deserve some type of gift to make up for the reserved time. Even if it is just a couple of hundred dollars gift card or PayPal deposit. It says a lot about what type of person you are and it tells me that you respect my time.
Sure you can get away with just choosing to never see each other again. You can also get away with stealing office supplies at work. You won't be punished, your character will just be more sharply defined.
but that does not give you the excuse to be inconsiderate. If one of the two parties has to cancel the appointment it is on them to make it right. No matter what the circumstances. When determining what is the appropriate compensation there are many things to be considered. How much time was reserved for you? How much notice were you able to give? Was there any type of cancellation policy in place when you booked? Even with no policy it is a fair and kind gesture to to make it up to the other person.
If I had to cancel the same day then I would give free time to my date as soon as possible. Something along the lines of an additional free hour or two depending on the time booked. If I cancelled with absolutely no time for him to find someone else then the next date would be totally free. Yes, even if I got in a car accident on the way to the appointment.
I would expect the same kind of manners from the gentleman who cancelled on me. I don't always get it, and I cannot enforce it, but it is the right thing to do. Same day cancellations deserve some type of gift to make up for the reserved time. Even if it is just a couple of hundred dollars gift card or PayPal deposit. It says a lot about what type of person you are and it tells me that you respect my time.
Sure you can get away with just choosing to never see each other again. You can also get away with stealing office supplies at work. You won't be punished, your character will just be more sharply defined. Originally Posted by HeatherDAngelo
You bring up a great point about "consideration". When this happened to me I was still newish and wasn't thinking along those lines. But now that I'm farther along in the game, yes! These policies and procedures are a great idea!!! It goes to show an "honest business" vs "is she gonna flake again...lets roll the dice".
And in turn, it keeps the Men on track too with their last min cancels. :-D
Excluding cedar allergies, I cancel if I don't feel 100%.

As a provider, if I need to cancel I try to do so asap once I know there is a problem. How I handle client cancellations depends on our relationship. Most of the time it doesn't bother me and take whatever explanation is offered at face value and leave it at that. Sometimes I see if there is something I can do to help. Others we just laugh over the phone at life's terrible timing or our poor meal choice that is making an encore appearance.

Generally, if I cancel the same day I make sure to be generous with the clock the next time I see them.
Sangel is just that, what a refreshing attitude!!!
Guest010619's Avatar
I was on my way to see a provider and when I got to the incall she never answered her phone. I waited 30 minutes before heading back and called her one more time. She was hit hard with allergies and had trouble staying awake. I was glad she was okay otherwise and we talked of meeting another time.
Sometimes it's not just allergies or sickness but also traffic or traffic conditions. When weather advisories recommend staying home because of floods, ice or other weather conditions, it's hard to give an excuse as why you must leave the house, or why you are on your way out and you run smack dab into a mile long traffic jam.
I'm a germaphobe and have met other providers who are as well. Once in a checkout line the cashier sneezed out in the open. I put everything back in the cart and. Wen and replaced everything that I was about to purchase. I am not about to bring germs into my pantry.
If you and I are planning a trip together and you get the sniffles, just let me know. Having worked around children for many years, I have a strong immune system and hardly ever get sick. So if you feel good enough to see me, I may be okay with it too. But, let me make that call, don't just assume and cancel unless you really don't feel up to it.

Same goes if I'm not feeling 100%. I will let you know and let you decide if it's worth a risk. If you've already book the trip and have been planning on seeing me for months maybe the fact I have a scratchy throat won't be a big deal - or maybe it will, you decide.

I also agree 100% with Heather. If I do cancel, I will do what I can to make amends. And if you (the guy) cancels, I would suggest asking the girl what she feels is fair - they will usually tell you and often they don't really ask for all that they deserve.
bc7274's Avatar
I have only been canceled on once due to aunt flow showing up. So we just got together for dinner and drinks. I have also had to make the call to the same lady when i got stuck in Atlanta with a broke airplane.
Shit happens. How you handle it is the difference between ok providers and great providers.
When I get sick I send an immediate email letting my gentleman know. Depending on how ill I am I offer him the option to keep the date. If I am beyond a cough and some sniffles I let him know and offer a small discount.

Should my gentleman get sick I have a policy that works predominantly in his favor. First cancelation/reschedule with good reason is understandable. Second (if consecutive) must adhere to the fee of the lost appointment. Third (again if consecutive) will likely be placed on my personal DNS list. There are rare exceptions to these rules of course. Generally I try to be understanding.
Sickness happens, and I would rather have a client cancel our rendezvous than show up sick. I am very understandable of this and also cancel when I am sick.

SARS and Ebola and generally the flu are the result of people going out in public when they are ill.
Sickness happens, and I would rather have a client cancel our rendezvous than show up sick. I am very understandable of this and also cancel when I am sick.

SARS and Ebola and generally the flu are the result of people going out in public when they are ill. Originally Posted by Natashasummers
Of course you should cancel when you are sick. That does not excuse you from making it up to the other party. It is not going to kill you to give him some free time to make up for the time he lost. It is also not going to kill him to take some of the funds he set aside for the encounter and share them with you to compensate for your loss of time. Obviously it is on a case by case basis. Things such as how much notice was given and how much time was reserved and how the other persons day was affected come into play.
Honesty always best. Visited a touring provider who was on the verge of strep, didn't let me know, and caught a mild case. She ended up hospitalized it got so bad. I was fine. Last minute cancellations for illness in this business if OK w/ me. Doesn't matter if true or not, but best to err on side of caution.
WOMBAT's Avatar
My two bits,

If I am not feeling well or even feel like I am coming down with something I would cancel ASAP. If I do then no matter if it is a day away or same day I try and bring a little gift or something special to the next encounter. Better I know the person better the gift.

I do not expect the lady to do anything if she is not feeling well. I am just happy that she made the decision to cancel. I would rather mess up my schedule than have the potential of catching Flu, Strep, etc... We all have bad days etc...