Is it a slur? What are your thoughts?

So I've had multiple instances lately of providers referring to themselves and their peers as "hookers." I had been operating under the assumption this is almost more of a slur if not something worse.
Providers: What do you think your job title is? Do you refer to yourself this way?
Hobbyists: Do you feel disillusioned? Do you refer to providers as such or something else? Escorts?
Chung Tran's Avatar
it's not a slur, especially for those of us here.. I think of it like Gay people calling themselves "queer", or black people calling themselves "nigga".. it takes the power out of the word.
I call them penile treatment specialists.
ElisabethWhispers's Avatar
I'm not fond of the word "hooker."

I don't like the term, or the word "whore" being used, either. But I'm older and well, I'll admit that I'm probably not in the majority.

A LOT of my younger working sisters in this business use the term "whore" or "hooker" to describe themselves and feel it's a term of empowerment. And more power to them for believing that.

For me, it's derogatory. And I hear it being used in a negative tone. By the media. Others. I don't see it as being an empowering word. I see it as a negative.

Lenny Bruce was the first one that I heard, in a skit of his (on film) about a word losing the word's potency if used continuously. He used the word, for his example, as "nigger." I'm too lazy to find it for everyone to see but it's wonderful.

However, that was many decades ago and his philosophy was just wrong, although clever in its presentation.

Using the term frequently, and with an offhand stance, doesn't make the word lose the initial meaning. That takes more than 4 or 5 decades, and possibly will not happen at all.

But heck, I could be incorrect. Etymology is a difficult topic and one that is full of ebbing and flowing. Once again, I DO doubt that in the future (near or otherwise) the word hooker will mean something, to most people, as a positive. In ANY verbiage being used.

For me, those words are debasing.

And in this world, where SO MUCH debasing takes place just when giving a blowjob for many (and NO, I do not see giving oral sex as debasing. I LIKE it and do many here. MANY people, male and female, find oral sex to be a debasing activity, for some reason. It's a common thought), I don't see why adding another word to the everyday litany of words to be used while participating in this world is necessary.

Lose the term "hooker" from the verbal and written vocabulary except, as needed, a passing reference. That works for me.

And since I'm writing a novelette right now, let me add another thought or three. I've referred to myself as a hooker before. So sometimes, I'll admit to being a hypocrite.

However, I don't like the term when someone is referring to me as a sex worker. I prefer companion. Or being just called Elisabeth, without a descriptor. OR a sex worker, which is probably my preferred term, but I like it and it's accurate.

Interesting topic. Thanks for reading my long-winded response!

Happy holidays, everyone!

Sincerely,
Elisabeth
The power dynamics at play are different when someone who identifies as such, in this case a full service sex worker, reappropriates the word for the purpose of self empowerment. Or as a term of endearment or to express solidarity with other people who share that identity and experience. In those cases, it is much less likely that "hooker" or "whore" or "ho" is being used in a way that is malicious and derogatory. So, in my opinion, context is really important.

For me, I'm okay with being called "hooker" by my fellow sex worker friends. The other instance in which I'm open to being called "hooker" or "whore" or other variations is during D/s play, as I often times enjoy consensual verbal humiliation.
L.A.'s Avatar
  • L.A.
  • 12-28-2015, 08:29 AM
I know what I am and I know what providers are HOWEVER....
I prefer the terms provider and client.
pmdelites's Avatar
what gets me more upset is the use of "hooktard" - esp since it derives from "retard" which is an older but derogatory term for someone who has a congenital or illness related disabling brain condition.

but i let it slide cos all i can do is hopefully raise awareness of the slur-ness & derogatory-ness of the word.
Laura Lynn's Avatar
I prefer to be called a companion. But when joking around or even when making a point about something, I will use the terms whore or hooker.

Like when I joke with Kendall or THN, YOU'RE A DIRTY LIL WHORE. ;-).
Going on semantics, most of us are 'whores', I know I am anyway. There's not too much I wouldn't do for money and since I have no moral objection to sex of any kind, my worldview is intact!

'Hookers' I would think advertise - hence "hooking" people in to see the peep show.

When I think of 'escorts' I think of someone who accompanies a person to a party where you're not supposed to go alone.

Personally I don't see any shame in any of these terms, but calling someone a whore seems crass. I usually just say provider and hobbyist, staying with the times. But we know what we are!
Nina the Dicknapper's Avatar
as much as you guys try to reword it at the end of the day you're a hooker & there's nothing wrong with that! Be a proud hooker cause I know I am. I love making money & I love sex. Being a hooker is a win, win to me. You get paid & get a nut all at the same time! I love my little whore ass!!!

Being called "His little whore/hooker" during intense sex is awesome
Iam45's Avatar
  • Iam45
  • 12-28-2015, 09:40 AM
So I've had multiple instances lately of providers referring to themselves and their peers as "hookers." I had been operating under the assumption this is almost more of a slur if not something worse.
Providers: What do you think your job title is? Do you refer to yourself this way?
Hobbyists: Do you feel disillusioned? Do you refer to providers as such or something else? Escorts? Originally Posted by gentlegiant88
Any word that identifies you is a slur if it is used to demean you.
verygood69's Avatar
I prefer to use the word.... Ladies!
SisterTwister's Avatar
I prefer to use the word.... Ladies! Originally Posted by verygood69
This.

Regardless of motive I know the job takes balls most guys don't have.
I wish people would stop being sensitive and politically correct - yes any ladies that sells pussy is a whore, hooker, or a prostititite and guys are tricks and Johns and that's the bottom line. If it makes a provider feel better to be called an escort instead of a hooker then she's a very sensitive individual. We are all all hookers and tricks accept it!!!!
Hooker.......not a bad word compared to what the worst of the world calls hookers.