Getting back on the horse.

OK Not sure if this is wise. This is a pretty rough audience.

I had another thread about a provider I've seen well over a dozen times. I want to be clear that I have always received good service from this provider, which is why she received the bulk of my return business and my tips.

But that good service never included an orgasm for her. I tried, many times and ways. Never gave her one. Not even a fake.

Ok, I'm thinking, she's working. I'm just a client. Maybe she is just quiet.

Then, I had an opportunity to see her in a group setting. A rare get together with other gents and girls at a swingers party. This was a paid event for the gentlemen, with many providers present.

Within a few moments, these other gentlemen had her singing an aria. She's a soprano! I never would have guessed.

I was extremely happy for her that she was able to achieve such noisy climaxes over and over.

I was extremely sad that I could never do that for her.

I've always been a bit self conscious and insecure about myself. Especially in terms of equipment and sexual prowess. And now, even though this activity is my only viable sexual outlet, I can't bring myself to pick up the phone and call her, or any other provider.

After being thrown, How do I get back on the horse?
pyramider's Avatar
Downloading porn is your best option.
Fast Gunn's Avatar
Well, you put one foot in the stirrup and climb aboard.

You are over-thinking this minor incident and erroneously linking your self-worth to giving or not giving a girl an orgasm.

Book a session with a different girl and focus more on having fun and less on performing.

. . . Sex is supposed to be about relaxed, carefree pleasure. You're making it into some sort of Olympic event and holding your breath until the judges score your performance by allowing your mind to turn play into work. Ease up, cowboy!

~Ze~'s Avatar
  • ~Ze~
  • 10-26-2013, 05:21 PM
She may have been taking the quiet* hint from you? Or at least reading that was what you wanted/enjoyed.

Maybe give her another call, and when she leans in to kiss you.. give her this mischievous smile and say "let's get loud and let it all out"....

Then again.. a million and one providers out there know how to have fun in session without it needing to be some public spectacle. Have your pick.
Bobave's Avatar
Then again.. a million and one providers out there know how to have fun in session without it needing to be some public spectacle. Have your pick. Originally Posted by ~Ze~
This. She clearly didn't appreciate you as much as you appreciated her. Hard to hear, I know, but you need to look for another (different) provider who will appreciate you more. Or, as the popular expression here on the board goes, "time to move on:... Sounds callous, but it's the only realistic attitude...
JONBALLS's Avatar
she prob just liked getting off in public, or the audience tipped the scales...who the fuck knows ?

you cant figure these woman out

i just go down there and make an appearance for a couple of minutes

then i just get the HELL outta there,,, thats a code i i aignt cracken

nothin to dwell on, maybe your too wound up in yourself to be able to get in tune with her?

getting hung up on one is for real life these are paid girls, grab the next one in 10 mins
JONBALLS's Avatar
no matter what Tebow loves you
pyramider's Avatar
Maybe not ...
universalenergy's Avatar
This may sound selfish but who is being paid to be satisfied. Get a FBSM with a happy ending. After all it is all about you being satisfied.
RedLeg505's Avatar
This may sound selfish but who is being paid to be satisfied. Get a FBSM with a happy ending. After all it is all about you being satisfied. Originally Posted by universalenergy

^^^^^^^ What he said. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem doing this to make it pleasant for the provider, from little gifts, to being freshly showered and clean, to doing DATY to make it nice for her. But.. the bottom line is.. MY PLEASURE comes first and if she doesn't come second, oh well, we tried.. I'm certainly not going to lose sleep over it.
awl4knot's Avatar
One of the great things about the hobby is that it gives a guy a chance to become a better lover. The variety of experiences and the willingness of some patient, nurturing providers to help you advance your skills almost forces you to become more adept and confident. Included in that confidence is the realization that you won't be catnip to all the kittens that you see but I will agree with you that it can be tough to know that others get more than you do. It happened to me this summer. I saw a beautiful visiting girl several times and although she would O I couldn't get the DFK that come from real passion. But in other reviews guys claimed to get this, and it bothered me. Still does, but the worse thing to do is pout about it. Since then I have seen three other ladies who have rocked my world and tempered my chagrine at not connecting with summer love. They reminded me that this is supposed to be fun and not a source of drama and doubt.

Go to the gym and get a good work out. Buy some new clothes or something else that will make you feel good about yourself and then choose some new playmates and have fun. Life is too short to brood about the past.
One of the great things about the hobby is that it gives a guy a chance to become a better lover. The variety of experiences and the willingness of some patient, nurturing providers to help you advance your skills almost forces you to become more adept and confident. Included in that confidence is the realization that you won't be catnip to all the kittens that you see but I will agree with you that it can be tough to know that others get more than you do. It happened to me this summer. I saw a beautiful visiting girl several times and although she would O I couldn't get the DFK that come from real passion. But in other reviews guys claimed to get this, and it bothered me. Still does, but the worse thing to do is pout about it. Since then I have seen three other ladies who have rocked my world and tempered my chagrine at not connecting with summer love. They reminded me that this is supposed to be fun and not a source of drama and doubt.

Go to the gym and get a good work out. Buy some new clothes or something else that will make you feel good about yourself and then choose some new playmates and have fun. Life is too short to brood about the past. Originally Posted by awl4knot
This. Is. Amazing. Advice.

The first steps are to get ones health and fitness at least at a good base level- no need to be a stud, just basic health. Second, if one is size challenged, the info at pegymdotcom and mattersofsizedotcomforwardslas hforum really does work. I used to be size challenged and am now above average, still growing.

The above can help with self image, but learning to be a good lover isn't something that comes natural to everyone. Best to find a nurturing provider who appeals to you, reach out to her and be honest but not sappy letting her know you want to improve your experience and lovemaking game. Treat her well, both financially and as a person.

I won't go into details, but a couple providers helped me through some of the lowest times in my life when my family and friends didn't even recognize my needs. The only downside is that some providers are surprised with how open I'll be with them and it takes them by surprise. I'll always have a debt of gratitude to women who choose to do this and do it well, for a living.
pyramider's Avatar
Friends and family are hardly the people one would seek for DFK, bj, or slap and tickle ... unless one is from Arkansas.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
OK Not sure if this is wise. This is a pretty rough audience.

I had another thread about a provider I've seen well over a dozen times. I want to be clear that I have always received good service from this provider, which is why she received the bulk of my return business and my tips.

But that good service never included an orgasm for her. I tried, many times and ways. Never gave her one. Not even a fake.

Ok, I'm thinking, she's working. I'm just a client. Maybe she is just quiet.

Then, I had an opportunity to see her in a group setting. A rare get together with other gents and girls at a swingers party. This was a paid event for the gentlemen, with many providers present.

Within a few moments, these other gentlemen had her singing an aria. She's a soprano! I never would have guessed.

I was extremely happy for her that she was able to achieve such noisy climaxes over and over.

I was extremely sad that I could never do that for her.

I've always been a bit self conscious and insecure about myself. Especially in terms of equipment and sexual prowess. And now, even though this activity is my only viable sexual outlet, I can't bring myself to pick up the phone and call her, or any other provider.

After being thrown, How do I get back on the horse? Originally Posted by PFCffff
if your going ta lease(repeat a lot frequent flyer but not sugar daddy type lease) rather than rent. You need ta lease more than one. And still rent from time ta time.
And let them know and see what ya doing.

This could make for a bit a drama. No problem, the competition factor will do them good.

Also best way too find ones you want to repeat with for years, RENT IT. And it sounds like you need ta do more renting.

More than one you frequent fly with will also give a small bit of variety. Also a safety net for them and you, as puppy love is a no no. And so is taking advantage of each other a no no.

so keep this gal for now, ta see how it plays out. And see others
Cpalmson's Avatar
Did you ever think that she was "acting" at the swinger party, or the dynamics of the situation were different there than when she is with you? We call it YMMV for a reason. If you are so concerned about your performance in bed and she is your main outlet, then talk to you. Heaven forbid you ask her what turns her on. Heck, I'm surprised you haven't asked her yet. I always try to get to "know" my dates ahead of time or within the first few minutes of the date. Treating her like a woman and not a cum deposit receptacle and maybe she will cum for you.