Translation guide to Backpage hooker ads

This should help you decide faster . . .

Translation guide to Backpage Ads

1) Thick - fat
2) Busty - fat
3) Exotic - black
4) Mixed - black
5) Asian - not the girl in the picture
6) "No African American Men" - I already have a pimp
7) Curvy - fat
8) "Afternoon special $30" - to cum is another 100 and then it's only a hj
9) Galleria Area - closer to the beltway
10) 100 lbs - 20 years ago when she was 7
11) Its me or it's free - it's NEVER free
12) Four hand massage - waste of money
13) Bombshell - fat
14) Kinky - diseased
15) Shemale - you'll throw up a little in your mouth when you see her naked
16) FATTeST AZZZZ - ghetto girl
17) 49.99 - it's 50 bucks you stupid shit
18) Jumbo Jugs - fat
19) Last day - until tomorrow that is
20) call for specials - the rent is do and I ain't got it!
21) Exotic Bombshell - fat and black!
22) Irish - ugly white girl

Fucking Awesome...

yep.

23) Stallion - stupid and fat, and this ad was written by my pimp.

lol

Here are few more:

• WELL REVIEWED AND VERIFIED: she thinks you are to dumb to check
• NO BLACK MEN PLEASE: I already have a pimp
• NO PIMPS: See above
• 100% INDEPENDENT: See above
• AVAILABLE 24 HRS A DAY: I'll answer if I'm not passed out from partying
• I'M NEW IN TOWN: I had to change my name because of all the bad reviews and alerts
• VISITING: I'm going to rip you off
• LAST NIGHT IN TOWN: See above
• 100% REAL & RECENT PICTURES OF ME: I'm using fake pictures I stole off the net that I kind of used to look like
• ♛♛♛☼♚❇※♕♕♤♤: ⇒ I have a pimp and he posted this ad along with the 6 other ones below it
• TWO GIRL SPECIAL: See above
• NO RUSH: I'm going to get you to pop as fast as I can then throw you out

tHaT pOsT fUcKeN rOcKs

I'm thick, curvy, voluptuous, bootylicious, or FAT. I also don't see black guys (I don't wanna bottom out or wear my kitty out), and personal preference. I do not have a pimp either lol, and am not giving applications lmao. But love the thread, funny as hell!!!

24) Open minded - I don't do that, or that, or that...
25) Age posted - add five to ten years to the age posted

Four Hand Massage = We're hoping to get you off twice as fast for the full fee and half the work.

No Black Men = I hope this earns me bonus points with the white male audience, even though the irony of it all is me having a black pimp.

This stuff is funny. Even though some of our great eccie ladies post on BP, I wonder if the BP dodos ever get to read how they're viewed by the eccie crowd. For instance, there's a post of some idiot with her pimp sitting on the floor next to the bed where she's being photographed. Too dumb for words? No, I guess not.

Creed - That chick in your tag line is hot, who is she? Tell her I have a tiny little dick and won't wear her out like you do!

Creed - That chick in your tag line is hot, who is she? Tell her I have a tiny little dick and won't wear her out like you do! Originally Posted by utr_guy_in_houston

Why she has on two sets of panties is my question.

She made me take it down, or she was going to threaten to use my 2-inch dick as an avatar.

It WAS Michelle, in Houston.

Well, it was fun while it lasted.

lmao..those are funny

Beware of cropped pictures