Male frustrations with the hobby. Things they'd rather not say in public.

I've recently made it known to the male half of the community that if there are things they are afraid to bring up in public they can approach me privately and I will air it out in co-ed.

One thing that's been noticed over the last year of the hobby is a lot fewer guys are willing to speak their minds. A big part of that is that is because they are afraid of getting ghosted, black listed, spurious accusations behind their back, etc... You may be saying "well there are men's only areas..." but those leak like a faucet. Plus this isn't just to benefit the dudes. It's also to give the providers valuable info that most guys wouldn't want to actually share and a WK will never say. This is not to bash any particular person. This is as much to give a head's up as to let guys vent. I suppose if you like the ladies can also tap me on the shoulder if there's something they would like said as well though I don't know of any providers afraid of speaking their mind.

So let's get started in order of what I've heard the most. I'm fully expecting to get a lot of hate for this.

The first piece on the agenda is responsiveness. I've gotten this one a lot. Lately it seems like more and more girls are taking an excessive amount of time to respond to texts in the middle of a conversation. I don't mean that you're busy and it takes you an hour or two to respond to a text. I mean you respond and then responses there after come spaced an hour apart. Aside from being a huge turn off it's just bad customer service and a lot of guys will quit out of frustration.

Ghosting is becoming even more of a problem. There are quite a few girls who even above the regular flakiness that occurs when working out of a hotel room have started double booking guys and then ghosting the lowest bidder or the person who arrived second. Or maybe it's not even that and you just can't be bothered. That pretty much withers the business relationship right off the bat because what kind of chump is going back to a girl who does that crap? Everyone you piss off like this is a potential extra 150-300 a month depending on your rates.

Advertising. I've gotten plenty of complaints about the fact that your menu looks like it should be filled out in triplicate with over a dozen different prices, upcharges, etc. Huge turn off. And a lot of guys (myself included) basically automatically assume that you're going to be mechanical and a bad time. This is from experience. Bear in mind I am not talking about someone who has incall/outcall divvied up into hh/hr with an upcharge for outcall and/or greek or anything but some girls take it way, way too far. I'd provide examples but I'm specifically trying to avoid calling anyone out here.

Lastly near and dear to my heart is that plenty of girls either have a WK feeding them info from the men's areas and ROS or have a mandle. I'm not going to tell you not to because if you've made yourself a mandle there's nothing I can say that you're going to listen to. But it's a huge problem. It causes guys to be extremely reluctant to speak their mind anywhere and it's terrible for the community and even for the girls. Obviously guys have more opportunities to get screwed over or disappointed without quality intel. Girls that would otherwise do much better are kind of screwed because of supply and demand: if a girl who would otherwise get poor business due to misleading pics, a poor attitude, or even actions inappropriate to the hobby can't be spoken of by dudes then she's taking YOUR business. When a girl is not what the dude bargained for and he regrets dropping $xxx on her that's money that could be in your pocket.

There's always going to be girls who do that. But if you're the type who doesn't need to engage in that you might think about reporting it if you find out. They're your competition and they're harming you along with the hobbyists.



That's my piece though I will update or create new threads as people put out more they'd like addressed.
winn dixie's Avatar
All these complaints go both ways. How about guys that get rejected and automatically start lies about providers for revenge? Some have gone as far as to organize to hurt the lively hood of certain providers that have turned them down or who have posted warnings about them.
To the men this should be fun. But many of these women depend on these sites for their lively hood.
Again all of these complaints go both ways!

All this posting in private is cowardly! Post in co/ed and the truth will come out! For both sides!

The real problem is over moderation and limits on providers advertisements.
Little Monster's Avatar
My biggest complaint is there aren't enough providers that offer BBFS. I've tried numerous angles to achieve that service, I've offered them more money and other stuff. But that hasn't worked. I was thinking about getting more aggressive but then if I did that they may post an alert on me here or oh2 or something like that. So I figure Nahh, better not do that.
Cap'n Crunch's Avatar
My biggest complaint is there aren't enough providers that offer BBFS. Originally Posted by Little Monster
There are plenty who allow bare back, often for no upcharge. I let em know by making some horse sounds, nays, and what not. She knows to get down on all fours; I jump on her back (sans saddle) and ride her around the room until her hands and knees are red.

My biggest complaint is very few girls have riding crops; you have to bring your own.
Risn2TheOccasion's Avatar
And then again, there are guys who are speaking the truth about what happened to them. If a guy has a history of bashing providers because he doesn't get his way, that is suspect. If a guy has a long history of positive experiences here and posts a negative experience, then it is wrong to assume his post is out of revenge. We weren't there. But when word reaches the WK's, they will participate in damage control for the lady to enhance their own selfish interests.

All these complaints go both ways. How about guys that get rejected and automatically start lies about providers for revenge? Some have gone as far as to organize to hurt the lively hood of certain providers that have turned them down or who have posted warnings about them.
To the men this should be fun. But many of these women depend on these sites for their lively hood.
Again all of these complaints go both ways!

All this posting in private is cowardly! Post in co/ed and the truth will come out! For both sides!

The real problem is over moderation and limits on providers advertisements. Originally Posted by winn dixie
winn dixie's Avatar
And then again, there are guys who are speaking the truth about what happened to them. If a guy has a history of bashing providers because he doesn't get his way, that is suspect. If a guy has a long history of positive experiences here and posts a negative experience, then it is wrong to assume his post is out of revenge. We weren't there. But when word reaches the WK's, they will participate in damage control for the lady to enhance their own selfish interests. Originally Posted by Risn2TheOccasion
Yep, and thats life. Most choose what they want to believe and who to listen to.
One thing that I was perhaps a bit slow to learn is that the details of a review are often fantasies. Do not take the ROS as the full truth. It makes for incorrect expectations and jealousies.
Eh. I'm not too concerned with white knights. They're sad creatures who end up getting played by the same girls they're feeding info to. The real problem is when they feed it to a provider that's a psychopath. I had it happen recently where I just mentioned that a girl had misleading photos and I have been hearing from her off an on for a couple months now, threats of outing, etc. Most ladies would just go "Well screw him then" and cross me off the list.



One of the things that gives me hope is when I get messages of support from ladies when I have spurious accusations incoming. So even that doesn't do much.



All you can really do is read between the lines and judge the actions of the accuser and accused. For instance I've seen plenty of people throw shade at CaseyKK or CubanAva and in terms of personality and "trust" I rank both providers pretty highly or at least the accuser's rep pretty low.
One thing that I was perhaps a bit slow to learn is that the details of a review are often fantasies. Do not take the ROS as the full truth. It makes for incorrect expectations and jealousies. Originally Posted by bjarnibear

It turns out that "I had a dream that..." is actually correct.
winn dixie's Avatar
It's sad when our personal tastes takes over negatively and we post deceitful and misleading things about others. Does not matter the reason.
What's wrong with White Knights? Their usually positive people who like helping others. Most women I know love White Knights. But in here people tear them down. Why? Because they say nice things about another person that you don't agree with? Y'all do know that not everybody clicks together in this business, right? I think if you have a bad experience with a provider,by all means, review them as such
and move on. Don't get stuck over one provider who did a subpar performance. Write a review and move on.
I'm sure some of y'all are in corporate business and what we do in business after they have been wrote up for whatever - is fire them and forget them. And if someone calls for an employee reference then we tell them "Hell,no." and go about our day.
The other thing I've noticed is some of you have a big chip on your shoulder. It shows in your posts. Remember this a hobby - nothing more- nothing less. Love you all..xoxo
Britttany_love's Avatar

All you can really do is read between the lines and judge the actions of the accuser and accused. For instance I've seen plenty of people throw shade at CaseyKK or CubanAva and in terms of personality and "trust" I rank both providers pretty highly or at least the accuser's rep pretty low. Originally Posted by Killeeninformer2
Yup always read between the lines because there is always someone spreading bullshit about you. That's shitty huh when good people get labeled as something different by a bunch of guys who have never met that person. Yet they choose to listen to fabricated bullshit made up by god knows who just because so and so said it so it must be true. I've had my fair share of shade throw my way from a bunch of you. You would be surprised some of us are actually really nice people. Don't judge me unless you have actually taken the time to get to know me.

I'm here because I like what I do and enjoy the people I see. I'm not here for this type of drama. A bunch of you need to step back and look in the mirror. Why are you here? So you can be internet bullies? If you are not here to get your dick wet then move on already. You want change and for girls to get on the same page as you guys well for starters stop bashing the girls here.
Treetop78759's Avatar
How about guys that get rejected and automatically start lies about providers for revenge? Some have gone as far as to organize to hurt the lively hood of certain providers.
. Originally Posted by winn dixie
Isn't this exactly what you are trying to do to Sue?
winn dixie's Avatar
Isn't this exactly what you are trying to do to Sue? Originally Posted by Treetop78759
I stand behind anything i post. Especially when many others have posted the same. Including yourself! Lets get back on topic. ok?
sue_nami's Avatar
thank u treetop, I was going to say the exact same thing but had decided was not going to enter the fray here. absolutely NO ONE says these things about me but winn, whispers and their minions. everyone knows it is a flat out lie and yet they do that exact thing he is saying here. funny thing about hypocrites, they never see themselves as culpable in the lies they spin and baloney they spout. They think everyone else is at fault. Their long running harassment campaign of spreading outright lies and misinformation about me is well documented and based on groundless accusations. the pot is calling the kettle black in winn's case in this thread.