Security, safety, and privacy are three important pillars in this little hobby world of ours. It's up to each of us, on both sides of the transaction, to ensure that our playground stays safe and fun for everybody.
Periodically, we hear of incidents where someone's safety, security, or privacy has been compromised:
- A lady has to leave the hobby because a client becomes infatuated with her, showing up at her incall unannounced, or posting negative reviews and comments, or even outing her to friends/family/coworkers
- A lady has to announce a hasty retirement because a client's wife or significant other discovers incriminating evidence on a phone or when viewing a web browser's history or as a result of a little GPS snooping, and starts harassing her over the phone, or at home, or at her place of regular employment
- A lady becomes infatuated with one of her clients, showing up at his house or place of employment unannounced, or bad mouthing him to other providers, or calling and texting at inappropriate times and in inappropriate ways (the dreaded "pussy picture text"), or threatening to out him to his wife/family/coworkers/friends
With these incidents (and others) in mind, I'd like to provide some tips for both ladies and guys:
- Always use a hobby phone and a hobby email account. (The ability to clear your call history or texts is not sufficient. If things go south with your spouse, the first thing his/her attorney is going to do is request your cell phone records... and you are toast.)
- Only use your own computer/tablet/phone to access ECCIE, P411, and your hobby email account. Be sure to clear the web history or use the "private browsing" features in your web browser as a secondary safety step. Using a friend's wifi hot spot can be problematic if they are technically savvy as modern routers can be easily configured to log web traffic. Using a shared/family computer/tablet/phone, no matter how careful you think you are, could get you into hot water. You only have to slip up once.
- Never use your hobby phone or hobby email account for anything non-hobby related. All the social media sites (Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Snapchat, Pinterest, Tumblr) do a scarily good job of matching your information. You don't want to show up as a friend suggestion on someone else's social media account (and vice versa!)
- Never park your car where a hobbyist or provider (or her pimp or "friend" or "booker") can get your license plate number. In Texas it's ridiculously easy to get personal information from your tag.
- Don't disclose personal information about yourself. Over time, another person can glean a lot of information about you from all those little snippets you gave and Google is not your friend.
Many years ago, Dagny (a former well-known A-list provider here) posted a thread entitled "Ten Things Every Provider Should Know About Their Clientele". For the purposes of this discussion, I want to cite 4 of them:
Reading those four in this context, it is easy to see how what is spoken and done during a session can be misinterpreted, especially if one of you becomes smitten with the other. Sex, even when it is pay-for-play is an incredibly emotional and satisfying experience. In that afterglow of orgasm, it's way too easy to read things into words and conversations, and to make bad assumptions and come to wrong conclusions.
1. That seeing you is often times the highlight and/or Culmination of their day, week, or possibly even month.
3. That once in session, your words spoken carry far more weight and have a much larger impact than you might imagine.
5. That you often times fill a void in someone’s life which stretches far beyond that of both the physical realm and the relatively short time period the two of you spend together in a session.
6. Real or imagined, expressed or not – you DO matter and DO make a difference to so many.
Play safe!
z
