Monday morning Metaphors with the ManSlut

ManSlut's Avatar
When I was a kid I loved to eat Cracker Jack, the molasses coated popcorn and peanut treat with the cheap little prize inside (Sidenote: CJ is considered America's first junk food first sold in 1893 by a German immigrant)...It was a big deal to get my hands on a box of Cracker Jack with Sailor Jack and his dog Bingo on the little box...I couldn't wait to eat all the popcorn and peanuts to get to the little prize inside the box.

Well, one day I ate a box of Cracker Jack and lo and behold there was no prize inside!!!.... I couldn't believe it, this had never happened before. I took the situation to the all-knowing Goddess of problems, my Mother, and asked her, "What should I do?"...Her response was, "If it bothers you then you should write the Borden Co. and tell them."

Well, I had a little time on my hands at 8 years old, so I did, with my mother's help.

About a month later I received several cases of Cracker Jack from the Borden Co. with a letter of apology from someone within the company. It was a matter of great concern to him that I was satisfied with their product. He stated the simple fact that because I took the time to write to them was enough for him to know I was a loyal Cracker Jack consumer and here was my year supply of Cracker Jack (actually lasted about 6 months after I shared with the neighborhood kids and my sisters).

I still eat Cracker Jack to this day and the memories of a 6.5 oz glass bottle of Coke and CJ have never faded.
Excellent customer service is always a good thing. Ditto.
  • hd
  • 11-03-2014, 11:04 AM
So................what you're trying to say is, I should expect to get some bad pussy once in a while with all the good pussy that I do get?

Although I can't say I've ever gotten any bad pussy, some is just better than others!

Thanks ManSlut, I'm getting some pussy tonight, and I know for sure it's gonna be great!
sparrow1122's Avatar
Dear Manslut,
I am dissatisfied with this story. I fondly remember some great and funny stories from the past. This one was lacking the prize.
Please reply with a case of stories.
Chung Tran's Avatar
ManSlut knows that a box of cracker jacks and a bottle of coke, is one of life's greatest combinations..
Jake B's Avatar
And so began ManSlut's quest of writing reviews.
Put the peanuts from the CJ in hat bottle of coke and then you really have something!!
Ashtyn Belle's Avatar
When I was a kid I loved to eat Cracker Jack, the molasses coated popcorn and peanut treat with the cheap little prize inside (Sidenote: CJ is considered America's first junk food first sold in 1893 by a German immigrant)...It was a big deal to get my hands on a box of Cracker Jack with Sailor Jack and his dog Bingo on the little box...I couldn't wait to eat all the popcorn and peanuts to get to the little prize inside the box.

Well, one day I ate a box of Cracker Jack and lo and behold there was no prize inside!!!.... I couldn't believe it, this had never happened before. I took the situation to the all-knowing Goddess of problems, my Mother, and asked her, "What should I do?"...Her response was, "If it bothers you then you should write the Borden Co. and tell them."

Well, I had a little time on my hands at 8 years old, so I did, with my mother's help.

About a month later I received several cases of Cracker Jack from the Borden Co. with a letter of apology from someone within the company. It was a matter of great concern to him that I was satisfied with their product. He stated the simple fact that because I took the time to write to them was enough for him to know I was a loyal Cracker Jack consumer and here was my year supply of Cracker Jack (actually lasted about 6 months after I shared with the neighborhood kids and my sisters).

I still eat Cracker Jack to this day and the memories of a 6.5 oz glass bottle of Coke and CJ have never faded. Originally Posted by ManSlut
ManSlut.... I was going to send my apologies to you, for it was I that must have received your 'secret toy surprise in the pack' on that summer day in Central Texas. I was with my grandpa and brother & almost fell out of the back of the truck when I opened my CJ box and found not ONE but TWO prizes!

...but I changed my mind finding out you received cases after writing the letter. I'm heading out find a box of CJ right now!
Must be 40 years since I had a box (of Cracker Jacks). The prizes were kinda cheap but they had to be...plastic rings that wouldn't fit a baby, plastic animals that wouldn't stand up...remember the compass? Always pointed east...

An "adult" Cracker Jacks section would be cool...prizes like cock rings, condoms, little tubes of lube... Hmmmmmm. Just might write the factory and see what they say.
  • EZ.
  • 11-03-2014, 03:02 PM
I will pass on lube in my Cracker Jack
TexTushHog's Avatar
Good customer service. But it's funny how people react differently to different things. I hated Cracker Jacks. The very idea nauseates me. I thought they were too sweet back then and still do. But a coke poured over Cabbell's vanilla ice cream is an entirely different matter. And I haven't had a Coke float in ages (although I wonder if I'd still like it). Today, it too sounds too sweet.
doug_dfw's Avatar
So................what you're trying to say is, I should expect to get some bad pussy once in a while with all the good pussy that I do get?

Although I can't say I've ever gotten any bad pussy, some is just better than others!

Thanks ManSlut, I'm getting some pussy tonight, and I know for sure it's gonna be great! Originally Posted by hd
Wow you are luckier than me. Or a better researcher. I have had bad pussy- two contribute to this forum regularly, when they can.
Luke Skywalker's Avatar
Speaking of metaphors....not having a prize inside of you cracker jack box was a way that the Lord was trying to get you out of a bad habit.,
Chung Tran's Avatar
I haven't had a Coke float in ages (although I wonder if I'd still like it). Today, it too sounds too sweet. Originally Posted by TexTushHog
as the French would say.. I'll have a Coke Float tout de suite!
Chung Tran's Avatar
Speaking of metaphors....not having a prize inside of you cracker jack box was a way that the Lord was trying to get you out of a bad habit., Originally Posted by Luke Skywalker
ahh.. that's why I was missing the baseball card with my package of Lucky Strikes!