Pseudo Poll : How Many ?

rrrabbit's Avatar
Not really a poll ...

How many of you do this because you are too lazy to put in the effort into a real date ?

Maybe lazy is not the best word. But, variations there of. You get the picture.

Ladies, feel free to participate also please.

I'll start: I don't hobby if I'm seeing a civvie; so this is definitely my "too lazy to care" option. LOL.
Yeah, I think if you want to find/start up some sort of relationship with a civie, that kind of dictates that you need to leave the house from time-to-time, and this is where I run into trouble Actually, just give me some chinese food and a good video game on a Saturday night and I'm as happy as a clam. Problem is, I'm not getting laid that way. But that is where the hobby comes in; even if I don't have a steady girlfriend, I can always rent one lol

I don't mean for that to come across as pathetic as it probably sounds. I'm about as big of an introvert as you'll find, so the lack of company really doesn't bother me most of the time.
Whispers's Avatar
It comes down to my "Wife, GF and Mistress" Analogies and the 3 roles I believe a woman plays in a man's life...

When those roles are filled you won't see me hobbying....
lovelamp's Avatar
I date civvies and hobby... love the variety! Sometimes hobbying seems cheaper than civvies haha
cheater's Avatar
Everybody knows my auto part store story. Well the ones that don't think I'm full of shit. Will I was banging them on a reg. But I been seeing one like a gf. It kinda just happen. She don't mind if I see a reg. But I stopped and she has been taking very good care of me. So I'm kinda on brake till I see where this is going. I haven't seen a provider in a month. Its a lot cheaper. I think. But she is driving my mercedes. Maybe that's why she's here. But I told her to drive it. I do get to ride her a lot.
rrrabbit's Avatar
Yeah, I think if you want to find/start up some sort of relationship with a civie, that kind of dictates that you need to leave the house from time-to-time, and this is where I run into trouble Actually, just give me some chinese food and a good video game on a Saturday night and I'm as happy as a clam. Problem is, I'm not getting laid that way. But that is where the hobby comes in; even if I don't have a steady girlfriend, I can always rent one lol

I don't mean for that to come across as pathetic as it probably sounds. I'm about as big of an introvert as you'll find, so the lack of company really doesn't bother me most of the time. Originally Posted by WorknMan
LOL, I know exactly what you mean.

For those of us that your comments rings a bell with, we really ought to arrange a poker game, with some side entertainment.


Everybody knows my auto part store story. Well the ones that don't think I'm full of shit. Will I was banging them on a reg. But I been seeing one like a gf. It kinda just happen. She don't mind if I see a reg. But I stopped and she has been taking very good care of me. So I'm kinda on brake till I see where this is going. I haven't seen a provider in a month. Its a lot cheaper. I think. But she is driving my mercedes. Maybe that's why she's here. But I told her to drive it. I do get to ride her a lot. Originally Posted by cheater
I for one don't know your auto store story.

If there is a public version that you are willing to share, please do so. I get the feeling it has some amusement and a few chuckles baked into it.
lovelamp's Avatar
I stopped letting girlfriends drive my vehicles when one totaled a vette a couple years ago
cheater's Avatar
Its in other reviews. Getting it on at the autoparts. I don't drive that car anyway. It allways gets me pulled over.
rrrabbit's Avatar
It comes down to my "Wife, GF and Mistress" Analogies and the 3 roles I believe a woman plays in a man's life...

When those roles are filled you won't see me hobbying.... Originally Posted by Whispers
While I understnd exactly what you are saying, I will also add ... be careful what you ask for.

In some of my long term thingies, I found myself playing all of those corresponding guy roles for her. And pretty soon, I found myself feeling like I needed more space becase she was becoming too reliant on me and letting her other social bonds go to shit. As a result, I felt I was being latched onto, and started to go out more w/ the boys. This, of course, she resented.

Downhill from there.

I date civvies and hobby... love the variety! Sometimes hobbying seems cheaper than civvies haha Originally Posted by lovelamp
This!

last time i was single...i did very well for myself. Many times sleeping with a woman and just not wanting to see her again. So this seemed like a good alternative to all the drama that comes with being 'single and dating'

As for the cheaper part...that can be true as well. The one girl id DID want to see over and over...23 years old and 9 on any mans scale....cost some morney. Several dates ranging from $$ to $$$$$ range. In the end...she wasnt the right one either. I never bothered to try and figure it out...but im guessing a provider would been cheaper.


As for my current situation...in a relationship...and i just like the variety. I dont know what will happen this time when i let this one go and become single again...
atxbrad's Avatar
It more of a value vs. time equation for me. I have been dating a few civies lately. Seems like the magic date is #3. By this time I have spent about $300 and countless hours on the phone, text, and e-mail.

It just makes sence to me to give the lady $300, let her fuck my brains out, and move on down the road. Im not good with putting up with girlfriend bullshit so I never have a civie GF for very long. Plus I have A.D.D. and one woman cant keep my attention too long, I just have to have variety

In addition, I hate the "breakup" with civies. Im always called a self centered asshole.......go figure. I cant help but be honest, if Im not interested in them anymore I simply tell them that Im not interested.
Rand Al'Thor's Avatar
Maybe lazy is not the right word. I'm prone to kick them to the curb when their baggage/drama goes over my tolerance threshold.

Strange thing is, I seem to have a very low threshold when it comes to civvie relationships compared to hobby/stripper/SB. I'm willing to deal with just about whatever if I know that I won't have to deal with it tomorrow or the rest of the week. This threshold also is a moving target that is balanced by how hot they are and how good they are in bed.

I don't like having to deal with expectations set by society that I'm supposed to remember birthdays of their second cousins, their parents, anniversaries of when we first had a date, sex, BJ, and when we first heard a song. Fuck if I know or care. Nor do I really want to go to your best friend's sister's sorority sister's wedding. So I find that in many cases, as mentioned above, costs of dates, "helping out" with this or that, PLUS the emotional baggage, THEN social expectations that I'm supposed to fulfill just don't make sense to me.
rrrabbit's Avatar
Am I the only one who's reading the common theme is that we have become jaded over the years ?

Maybe I'm just reading what I want to into it ...

Let me elaborate on that a bit. At least, as it applies to myself.

When I was in college, it was more about the chase and how much I liked her 1st impression and her looks. After so many years, and so many relationships, I think I have come to the defeatist conclusion that:

1) since no one is perfect, all relationships are going to be a BUNCH of work

2) why waste 3 years of mental and emotional energy, only to give up and call it quits ?

3) admittedly, in many ways, I've become accustomed to America's fast food mentality: I know what I want, and I want it NOW dammit !!!

4) as I've gotten older, I've become more settled in my ways, and am willing to tolerate less; in conjunction with that, my income has increased, allowing for more options

Bottom line, after all is said and done and I take an honest look at the mirror, I've become jaded.

When I have a physical need I must scratch, I call my UTR.

On the rare occasion I want variety, I look up my list and scramble for references.

For my emotional needs, I go on the occasional date or dial an ex.
Am I the only one who's reading the common theme is that we have become jaded over the years ? Originally Posted by rrrabbit
Nah, not jaded in my case. Just lazy Don't get me wrong... I've had some ex-gfs with more issues than Reader's Digest, but being a bit older and wiser now, I can normally tell after talking to a lady for a very short time whether or not she's one of those. And if she is, I always steer clear. I don't care how hot she is. If she comes with lots of baggage/drama, she's not worth the trouble. Other men would do well to live by this rule.
i have put up with too much bs for too many years..because 'she was hot'

i dont think we are 'jaded'... i think we are enlightened to how it really is