I have done this several times. It is just a trust thing. One guy right now is used to seeing me Wed and Sat but I was feeling squirrelly this weekend and just needed alone time. He was totally cool about, even brought me lunch. But he is a big exception. Most clients would tend to get all pissy about it.
And I call bullshit yet fucking again on the SD being "in charge." I technically have three right now and the first time one of them tries to tell me who I can or cannot see, or what I should or should not be wearing or really anything other than "You look lovely, it is so nice to see you" will get kicked to the curb.
Originally Posted by Lovely_Lilianna
First, I didn't mean to offend.
Second, you're here on eccie. That suggests that you know what you're doing: that you're a provider, not a SB. Most SBs are not eccie hoppers. As such, you appear to be one of the exceptions. You, like the OP, have some hybrid of a provider/client relationship and an SB/SD relationship, and as I said above, if you're a provider, you're going to want to keep control.
Third, the ability to kick the other member of the arrangement to the curb doesn't mean you have control. All parties always have the option to walk away whether you're in control or the passive one. What I mean by being in control is just the controlling party is the one that tends to get the make decisions on which activities are acceptable for what prices/requirements. A provider gets offended if you negotiate. A SB tends to go along with whatever the SD offers, assuming it is reasonable. As the matter of fact, a lot of SBs go through several dates (including BCD activities sometimes) without ever getting anything in return as kind of a trial run for the SD. Like a pizza delivery guy, many SBs have no idea how much they'll receive when they visit their SD. They just get a gift at the end of the night. What I don't mean by control is something over the top like just because the SD is in control that means he automatically gets the right to hang his SB and have sex with her corpse.
Lastly, plenty of SDs do flat out tell their SB that they expect their SB to only see them professionally. As the matter of fact, this is one of a Shyster Jon's requirements on his standard contact form for SBs, which is stickied in the SB/SD forums. A lot of people use this contact template, although they hopefully reword it a bit.
Whether the SD actually expects the SB to hold up her end of the bargain by being exclusive to the SD is a different issue, but at the least the SD can expect that if the SB is seeing other clients, she'll go the extra mile to hide it from the SD, which increases the fantasy. Most providers loving tell horror stories about the creepy guy from earlier that day.
So, I maintain that in a true SB/SD relationship the SD is in control.