Hobbyist has this ever happened to you?

wellendowed1911's Avatar
Ok last week I saw an ad by a provider who just recently returned to Dallas(I won't state her name)- She posts an ad on this site but doesn't list her rates. I had a very good session with her perhaps 4 months ago and all went well.
I text her welcoming her back to Dallas and checking her availability- she then responds with the question: "How much are you willing to spend?" Ok so I text her back telling her the services I want and then asking her what are the rates for those services? Again, she texts me back and states how much are you willing to spend?
I then play it safe and list the rate I payed her last. She then tells me that her rates have doubled and then I politely decline the rate and she blasts me for being cheap and added some expletives.
Isn't it much easier for this provider to have posted her set rates for the service(s) instead of asking how much I want to spend? Hell, in a perfect world I would want to spend at least as possible on anything(sex,mortgage,car,food ,etc)-lol. This person is sort of well known but I am not sure what she was thinking- I mean if her rates have doubled and I don't agree to those rates- it doesn't make me a cheap person. Also just for the record- I did a search of her most recent review and the hobbyist paid no where close to what she was asking me to pay - I assume her rates doubled the day I called her- this was perplexing me because we had a great session before that incident.
LazurusLong's Avatar
Rent is due today so maybe she was looking to rake you over the coals and have you pay all of it.

Even though escorts always seem to post in big bold letters in their ads that the rates are NEVER negotiable, rates are almost always negotiable, especially during the first 4 days of the month.
wellendowed1911's Avatar
Rent is due today so maybe she was looking to rake you over the coals and have you pay all of it.

Even though escorts always seem to post in big bold letters in their ads that the rates are NEVER negotiable, rates are almost always negotiable, especially during the first 4 days of the month. Originally Posted by LazurusLong
Wasn't even thinking about that- maybe she thought she had a sucker or i wish it was an early April Fools Joke, but once she started calling me cheap and the expletives starting coming I knew it was a done deal.
I don't try to low ball anyone- if I look at the provider's ad and it's a certain rate for a certain service once I call you and make an appointment it's understood that I agree to the posted rate, but when you have no rate and you then ask me or another hobbyist how much you willing to spend? What kind of crap is that???
that is hilarious
Why wouldn't you state her name?
wellendowed1911's Avatar
Why wouldn't you state her name? Originally Posted by steviewinwood
If it's ok with the moderaters can i post her name?
The nerve of some woman. This should mabey be listed in the alert section as a upsell.
The nerve of some woman. This should mabey be listed in the alert section as a upsell. Originally Posted by Tara Evans
Babe, if they alerted all the upsells in this business that would be the busiest section on the board lol
Never bid against yourself. You'll always pay too much!
Chevalier's Avatar
The nerve of some woman. This should mabey be listed in the alert section as a upsell. Originally Posted by Tara Evans
It's hardly an upsell in the classic understanding: the lady quotes one price without any qualifications; based on her reviews/ads and/or market prices the client reasonably assumes that price covers everything; then once he pays, she hits him with some variant of "oh, that was just for my time; it will be $X [a substantial sum] more for me to take my clothes off." And of course if he pays the additional $X, she says "oh, that was just for me to take my clothes off; it you want to do [whatever] that will be $Y more."

That is an upsell.

This is just "make me an offer," which is usually considered a fair approach in other contexts, since the customer/client is under no obligations to play along and make an offer.

Personally, I probably wouldn't play her game -- even by quoting a price I'd paid her recently -- unless I was suggesting some sort of unusual arrangement she didn't normally offer, e.g., fetish or an extended appointment. Probably not even then; if she continued to ask how much I was willing to spend, I might respond that I prefer dealing with posted prices rather than the negotiating style more common to the Middle Eastern bazaar.

But it's not deceptive in any way for her to try. It may be a bad or ineffective business practice, in the sense of alienating prospective clients, but it's not unfair, let alone something worthy of an alert.

(A nasty response, if the prospective client really was polite in declining to pay that amount, is something else. Not rising to the level of an alert, but something others might reasonably want to know. Of course, sometimes "polite" is in the eyes of the beholder; I may think I'm being polite but the recipient might reasonably interpret my response as rude and warranting a response in kind.)

My opinion; YOMV.
pmdelites's Avatar
chevalier, looks like we were typing at the same time. and it sounds like we are of similar minds.

if [and i'm not saying you didnt] you "politely decline[d] the rate and she blasts me for being cheap and added some expletives."

then i would cross her off my list.

it's as chevalier comments, there are two parts to this - her rate and her reaction to your answer.

rates: she can charge what she wants and we can pay what we want.
her reaction: to me, for her to blast you, april fool joke or not, first of the month or not, is unconscionable [as ray of "car talk" would say]

it's not really an alert but it does seem like bad behavior to me.


un·con·scion·a·ble –adjective
1. not guided by conscience; unscrupulous.
2. not in accordance with what is just or reasonable: unconscionable behavior.
3. excessive; extortionate: an unconscionable profit.
  • npita
  • 04-01-2010, 09:06 AM
I've never had that happen, but in general, I hate negotiating price for anything. My usual way of dealing with that sort of game is to make a ridiculously low offer with the expectation that it will not be accepted and then go somewhere else. (For example, in this case, I might have said, $50.00 for 2 hours). I'd rather pay more to someone who is straight up and doesn't haggle than waste my time trying to get a good deal. I give people one shot to quote me a price/rate or whatever and then I either pay or go elsewhere.
wellendowed1911's Avatar
Chevalier and pmdelites you both make some excellent points. I do feel that she was trying to pull a fast one. As I stated earlier I am use to dealing with providers who have set rates so I know what I am paying for ahead of time. I just thought it was a classless act of her to ask me :"to make an offer" and then she gets rude and nasty when the offer I make doesn't fit her liking. It wasn't as if I offered her 50 bucks or something disrespectful- I just offered what I paid her last time because I wanted the same service(s). I am a little cautious of providers who rates are based on what you are willing to pay instead of a set rate because that would mean a janitor, an engineer, a doctor, Jerry Jones & Bill Gates would get the same service but at helluva different rates- well the janitor probably wouldn't get an offer, based on her premises. For the record the provider was Big Booty Britany(moderaters feel free to remove her name if it's against the rules to post names).
As I mentioned before a few months ago right before ASPD closed their doors I had a great session with her and she did an outcall to my place and everything went great and in actuality I actually thought perhaps it was someone booking for her, but I found it was really her based on the detailed text messages she mention of my home and of me so no doubt it was her texting me- oh well she's now off my list, but I will no longer respond to any ads that don't list a price for set services or if the provider ask me :"how much you are willing to spend."
I am still baffled about that question because come on doesn't everyone truly want to spend as little as possible for anything. What frugal person is going to go to a car dealership and say I want to spend as much as possible- do not offer me any rebates, etc or who would go grocery shopping and tell the cashier put those items back because they were on sale and I want to pay as much as possible for my food. I am glad that had a price to go by since I had a previous encounter with her so I knew kind of her ball park rates, had I not and was just guessing a rate it would have got ugly. For the record- I paid her 250 4 months ago for an hr session and then she tells me her session is now 500hr- last I checked we're slowly pulling out of the recession but we are still in one so this whole double my rates for the same services was a joke to me and I will admit I had a good session with her, but it surely wasn't worth 500 bucks and in my honest opinion she's not a high rolling escort to be demanding 500bucks an hr - if she gets that much out of her clients than more power to her.
pmdelites's Avatar
heard long ago ...

consumers want as much as they can have for as little as they can spend.
providers want as much revenue as they can receive for as little as they have to produce.

not sayin' it applies in this sub-culture, but....


in my book, if a woman doesnt have her rates listed, that doesnt remove her from consideration. i inquire and if it's within my realm of possibility, i take the conversation to the next question. same for location and appt times.

in my book, if a woman gets rude about something i mention or write, that DOES remove her from my consideration.
case in point [wrote about it in locker room or the longue] - i cancelled an appt w/ a woman 36hrs before the appt. i received in return about 3 or 4 rude text msgs saying how i'd fucked up her finances, how she depended on my being there, how her friend she was planning to help wouldnt be able to do whatever, whine, whine, whine. not only did i immediately delete those texts, i deleted her ph# and her complete entry in my black book. did save her photos and stories of our encounters :^)
Chevalier's Avatar
I had a good session with her, but it surely wasn't worth 500 bucks and in my honest opinion she's not a high rolling escort to be demanding 500bucks an hr Originally Posted by wellendowed1911
If you responded in those terms, rather than simply saying that was out of your price range, I would understand her interpretating that as not "politely" declining. Not that it would necessarily justify her response, but it would be more understandable.