When is a BED a not a BED

Alright. Just read a bunch of reviews and one thing struck me. A lot of the guys show up expecting a bed of some sort (headboard/footboard)etc. only to find a mattress lying on the floor.

Now, knowing that sex can be anywhere, on anything, at any time, and given only 1 hour to endulge, does a 6 inch mattress lying on the floor constitute all that is needed to complete the "said endulgence" or is it somewhat a lack of the romantic appeal that most guys hope NOT to find while hobbying?

There has been many references to the famed "couch" and such, but as I guy, I would expect to have access to a bed located OFF the floor. Im getting old, and climbing up from the floor takes time. LOL

Anyone else have a take on any of this?
Naomi4u's Avatar
Downright hilarious.

I read a review where it said the provider's bed was on blocks.

I read another one where it said the provider only had a mattress on the floor

I've read some reviews with the provider just having a sheet on the floor.

You'd think that providers charging $250 an up would at least have a normal bed but guess not.

I don't know how the heck someone could go for such. I would be uncomfortable.
LOL... Sounds pretty ghetto.
DallasRain's Avatar
I offer options for my sessions

I have a nice new bed & frame set in my tastefully decorated bedroom.......

and then in my other play area in the den,I have a futon mattress on a frame complete with all sorts of funky & furry throw pillows/a cotton sheet set/a fluffy blanket/and a nice pink rug...It is set up like Austin Powers shag pad...I have a disco ball/laser light/track lighting/surround sound/ & about a dozen candles!

I give the guy the choice of where he wants to play

{nothing is tacky,just set up for some wild play...lol}
thisguy23's Avatar
I dont like some of the padded beds in hotels, not good for K9 but great for sleeping on. I like to move the foot rest to the end of the bed and have her kneel on that with her elbows on the bed, me standing
I like the Pool myself.
burkalini's Avatar
If I go see a provider and all she has is a mattress on the floor I'm not fucking her or paying her. Period!!!
gimme_that's Avatar
I would just leave.......unless she did all on top activities for the time we booked or a major discount. That doggystyle knee to mattress contact could be uncomfortable. I gotta stretch my legs and stand man.
tia travels's Avatar
I had an outcall once where his bed (or the one he provided at least), was an air mattress for a swimming pool. Gee whiz!
pyramider's Avatar
Maybe he was going for the pool effect, did he use Coppertone as a lube?
grayturner's Avatar
I made this same observation on another board and was told that that I was a cheap f--- and if I didn't like it I should get a room.
Crawling around on the floor I find about as classy as taking care of business in a car. Some may like it, but it's not for me.
Jannisary's Avatar
I think how much I expect both in services of the provider and the physical location is dependent upon the fee I'm being required to pay.

If its with a street girl, a part-timer who's number is being passed around in pm on usasexguide, or a BP girl advertising 30 minutes for 75 or 100 then I don't think I'd expect gfe, msog, etc. I also don't think I'd expect her location to be the greatest and wouldn't be surprised if its just a mattress on the floor. Now I say that hypothetically since I don't see those types of providers and when I did it was always at a location of my choosing - a cheap hotel with a nice clean large comfortable BED.

My expectations of both a provider's services and her location tend to increase as the requested rates increase. If I'm going to a provider's incall and paying the normal rate that seems to be prevalent in my area for a hour date then I definitely expect the environment to fit with the rate I'm paying. I'm not paying 200+ to wind up fooling around on the floor, on an air mattress, etc. I'm expecting a bed. I nice clean normal bed. It doesn't have to be fancy or frilly or even huge. I would say a sturdy bed but hell I've been at incalls in 3.5 star hotels where I thought the bed was going to come apart during the session.
pyramider's Avatar
The star system for rating hotels is about as accurate as telling your girlfriend you will be sure to pull out prior to splooging.

As long as the mattress is clean I do not care if its on the floor or ceiling.
Pink Floyd's Avatar
I dont like some of the padded beds in hotels, not good for K9 but great for sleeping on. I like to move the foot rest to the end of the bed and have her kneel on that with her elbows on the bed, me standing Originally Posted by thisguy23
I have a 4" memory foam on top of my mattess and the girls love it, but it makes Doggy impossible.
thisguy23's Avatar
That what I was saying FNF +1