Small claims vs. provider?

I have a chunk of money pre-paid to a provider in advance for services. Sure, that sounds dumb, but after seeing her weekly for a couple months we had rapport and worked out a monthly deal. This was going pretty well; lots of fun, she would occasionally miss on me, but I was only a couple dates behind for the most part. She needed some stuff, so I bought it for her, as pre-paid services. The, with me about two months pre-paid, she cut me off over a small misunderstanding.

We talked and arranged a reduced amount for her to pay back, a considerable concession by me already. She was trying to cheat me out of all of it saying I owed her for cumshots (the original deal voided this as an upsell) and taking her out to lunch, so i made the concession. As of this post, she may still do the right thing. But I'm not sure; I've seen her shoplift, and I've good reason to suspect she's involved with public assistance fraud. And she doesn't communicate often, impolitely when so.

Yes, all these things were red flags as she got into my debt. But I was seeing her regular and while I was getting nervous, I hoped for the best and looked to get the books more balanced so I could not worry. I didn't make it.

I can't believe I'm the only dude to be in these shoes, and I'm looking for advice. Any decent way to get the money back? Anyone ever try small claims court with an escort? We know enough about each other to do some damage, but I'm probably in a stronger position re outing/alternative revenge, which I don't want to do. But I feel strongly cheated and betrayed and as such haven't dropped all my anger yet.

Can anyone share some helpful experience/advice? I know the #1 answer will be drop it and move on, but work is light lately and I'd like to take a run at the cash.

Drop the anger, write off the loss, cut her loose, never look back. Learn from your mistake.
Small claims court would be a little awkward explaining to the judge exactly why she owes you money, don't you think?
And if you were to actually get some sort of judgment against her, she still doesn't have any money.

And name her handle here, so no else gets hungup on this person.

I went to small claims against a former boss who stopped paying us employees and bounced checks. The judgment was in my favor but he never paid me...eventually claimed bankruptcy (though I know he wasn't bankrupt).

I agree with Chicachaser...that even if you win, who's not to say she'll even pay you. It's not like you can garnish her wages. And, you don't know if the judge will slap a fine on YOU or throw you in jail for whatever it is they throw the men in jail for when busting up a rendezvous.

I have advanced payments to providers and given other money out right without ever expecting it to be paid back. Fortunantly, every lady that I have done this with always treated me right and I am still friends with all of them. However, never give money with the expectation of anything in return. Then, if she does pay it back you can be plesently surprised.

Mark

Before actually going to small claims court, maybe someone can jump in and explain the "clean hands" thing that you have to have when you go in front of a judge or jury.

I know what it is but I don't know how to explain it.

Anyhow ... good luck! If this was a lady who would upsell you when you would come of her face, well, it does make me wonder what other game she was playing.

In terms of her (maybe) committing some sort of fraud, don't go there. Always remember, if you do something to someone else (like report them), you're the one that has to look in the mirror.

Two wrongs don't make a right. And she might make things right. Now, from the little that I've read, it sounds like she's trying to nickel and dime your situation, which is a bit sad overall. Especially since you've paid her, and helped her with other purchases, up front.

Again, good luck. I know this must burn deep down.

Elisabeth

You need to think long and hard about going to court. Your first problem is, this is not a legal profession. (I know theres nevada) There is a thing called clean hands in court. Trust me. You have dirty hands. It will not fly.

I agree cut your losses and run!
there is too much drama involved and will only result in dire consequences

Before actually going to small claims court, maybe someone can jump in and explain the "clean hands" thing that you have to have when you go in front of a judge or jury. Originally Posted by ElisabethWhispers

I forgot about that Elisabeth, and you are exactly correct

clean hands doctrine
n. a rule of law that a person coming to court with a lawsuit or petition for a court order must be free from unfair conduct (have "clean hands" or not have done anything wrong) in regard to the subject matter of his/her claim. His/her activities not involved in the legal action can be abominable because they are considered irrelevant. As an affirmative defense (positive response) a defendant might claim the plaintiff (party suing him/her) has a "lack of clean hands" or "violates the clean hands doctrine" because the plaintiff has misled the defendant or has done something wrong regarding the matter under consideration. http://dictionary.law.com/Default.aspx?selected=211

I forgot about that Elisabeth, and you are exactly correct Originally Posted by Chica Chaser

If he lived in Nevada, his hands would be considered clean, certain counties anyway. With any other state you could have a problem. It would be interesting to see what ShysterJon has to say on this.

A suit would be based on breach of contract. There are four elements to a contract: Offer and acceptance, which we have in this case, contractual capacity, which we also have, valid consideration, which we do not have because while the money paid is valid consideration, sexual services in exchange for that money is not, unless as has been previously noted you are in certain counties in Nevada. The fourth element is that the contract must be for a legal purpose, again not present, again excepting parts of Nevada. So of the four basic elements required to form a valid contract, this case has only two. It would likely be dismissed out of hand.
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As for the 'Clean/Dirty Hands' doctrine, that's more common in cases where, for example, you have a worker who is being paid under the table, he's injured, say in a car accident, and he presents a claim for lost wages. Since he hasn't been paying taxes on his salary, he won't be able to convince a judge to allow evidence as to his wage loss. He would be in the position of saying to the judge, "Yes, I've been cheating on my taxes, but she ran a red light so you should make her pay anyway." To which the judge responds: "Don't come to my Court with dirty hands seeking relief."
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What you need to do is give her a short deadline, says a few days or a week, and let her know you'll post her handle on these boards if she fails to make good. Then do it.

Dude , you can't be serious?? The best scenario you could expect for this asinine endeavor would be to get laughed out of court More probably you.re looking at a severe tongue lashing from the judge Hell they may send and chain you to the corner with a dunce cap No judge would honor a breach of contract for an illegal act (money for sex)

Contract Law 101 will tell you that contracts for illegal services are unenforceable. Also would you really want to go into a court of law, where the Judge and both Attorneys are bound to enforce the law and admit that you are engaging in an illegal activity? At the very least the Judge is bound by oath to make your local Law Enforcement folks aware of your activities. Let it go and don't do it again.

A suit would be based on breach of contract. There are four elements to a contract: Offer and acceptance, which we have in this case, contractual capacity, which we also have, valid consideration, which we do not have because while the money paid is valid consideration, sexual services in exchange for that money is not, unless as has been previously noted you are in certain counties in Nevada. The fourth element is that the contract must be for a legal purpose, again not present, again excepting parts of Nevada. So of the four basic elements required to form a valid contract, this case has only two. It would likely be dismissed out of hand.
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As for the 'Clean/Dirty Hands' doctrine, that's more common in cases where, for example, you have a worker who is being paid under the table, he's injured, say in a car accident, and he presents a claim for lost wages. Since he hasn't been paying taxes on his salary, he won't be able to convince a judge to allow evidence as to his wage loss. He would be in the position of saying to the judge, "Yes, I've been cheating on my taxes, but she ran a red light so you should make her pay anyway." To which the judge responds: "Don't come to my Court with dirty hands seeking relief."
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What you need to do is give her a short deadline, says a few days or a week, and let her know you'll post her handle on these boards if she fails to make good. Then do it. Originally Posted by Poet Laureate

So, if he lived in Reno, Nevada he could proceed with his case. If he lived in Las Vegas or any other state in the USA, he can't proceed with his case. Escorting is legal in Reno, but not in Las Vegas.

Ahhh... the good old fashioned " I'll pay you back a week from next never" incident. That sucks. But... court? Really? Good luck there buddy.

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