One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted
to him and during her questions about his life she asked him
how he managed for sex."What's that?" he asked.
She explained to him what sex was and he said, "Oh, I use a
hole in the trunk of a tree."
Horrified, she said, "Tarzan, you have it all wrong. I'll
show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes,
laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide. "Here," she
said, "You must put it in here."
Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her
an almighty kick, right in the crotch.
Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp,
"What the hell did you do that for?"
"Checking for bees!" said Tarzan.
A man gets shipwrecked on a small island. After a few days wandering,
he comes across a tribe of natives who have just lost their chieftan.
The tribe's high priest tells the man that as he is the first outsider
they have seen in twenty years, he must take three tests. If he passes
al three tests, the tribe will accept him as their new chief. "fair
enough," says the man. "Just let me know what the tests are and I'll
get right on them."
The piest takes him to a clearing with three straw huts in it, turns to
the man and explains the tests. "In the first hut, you'll find 20
gallons of our native beer. You must drink all of this to complete this
test. In the second hut is a gorilla with a sore tooth. You must pull
his tooth and survive to pass this test. In the third hut is the
ex-chieftan's daughter. You must make love to her until she can take nomore."
The man agrees to the tests and begns the first test. Three hours
later, he walks out of the hut and goes toward the second hut. The
priest asks if he would like to have a rest, but the man says he wants
to get all the tests done before he sleeps. He goes into th second
hut. After two hours he comes out covered from head to toe in blood and
sctratches. He turns to the priest and says "Now lead me to the girl
with the sore tooth."!!!!!!!! ___