A Little Compassion And Understanding Please

I just want to bring some enlightenment to the hobbyists from a provider's point of view. Of course I can't speak for anyone else, but I'm more than positive I'm not the only one that thinks like this, and I'm going to try and paint this picture for you guys crystal clear so y'all get the full understanding of what I'm attempting to convey. It's not many people that can admit to landing a job that they love to do. I mean lets face it, work is work whatever way you spin it and the term will always have that obligatory meaning in it. But for humors' sake, lets say you did land a job that doesn't make you sick to your stomach just thinking about it, hell, you even get a bit of enjoyment out of participating in this ritualistic, daily task that improves your financial status. However, as with anything that you get overloaded on, eventually after performing the same play over and over again, singing the same song day in and day out, sometimes a person will tend to get a little burned out. It doesn't mean they love that job any less or they are any less excited to fulfill their duty. It just means they might possibly be having an off day and could probably benefit from some compassion and understanding. So I guess what I'm trying to say is, when you guys enjoy our company in a session, as providers, please remember that we work hard at what we do. Speaking for myself, I love my job....my main goal and objective is to give you an extremely enjoyable, unforgettable and stress free time. And as working girls, we may sometimes have little bags under our eyes from being tired that make-up couldn't cover, or even be a little less enthusiastic than we usually are, hell, we might even have some extremely pressing things going on in our personal lives that could possibly be distracting us (because we are still people just like anybody else), but it doesn't mean we are any less interested in you or the task at hand. It just means we're normal just like you, your lady boss (if you have one) or the woman sitting in her car next to you in traffic. Please take that into consideration when you're critiquing every single thing that's going on and writing your reviews. Actually, it wouldn't hurt to take this bit of info out into the world everywhere you go. You never know what the next person is going through, what kind of day they're having or what happened to them 10 minutes ago. As human beings, we're not perfect, hard as we may try to be. But let's at least try to be better.
SknyDiva's Avatar
Beautiful words. Thank you ma'am! You speak for me.
Charisma, what a beautiful and insightful post that should make everyone want to change their way of thinking. It's surprising the feeling you get when you show a small act of kindness and how long that feeling lasts. And to see the change of expression on the other persons face is priceless.
Thank you Charisma, for posting your thoughts and sharing a part of yourself that others may not take the time to know.
DallasRain's Avatar
Great post--wise words! Thanks!!

I also LUV my job ...hell I have been doing this for over 30 years off & on!

Now my "reasons for doing this" have changed with the passing years....When I first started in my 20's,I did it to supplement the family income....I worked for an agency .......that lasted six years till there was a HUGE "turnover" in the family life {I became a ministers wife.....wow! lol}.......then when the kids became teenagers,we moved to Oregon to start a fresh life.I was bored and wanted to do something exciting instead of a regular day job.My SO and I were into the swinglifestyle,so naturally I was a horny gal! lol... my first thought was to start the hobby again...................I have now being doing that for that reason for over 10 years and I luv MOST every minute of it!!!

I say that if you find something you love and are good at it,go for it!!
When You Are Ready's Avatar
Wise, well thought out words. We all need to remember that the people on both sides of this hobby are human. Thank your for your thoughts.
gimme_that's Avatar
.........my main goal and objective is to give you an extremely enjoyable, unforgettable and stress free time.......... Originally Posted by Charisma Creams
That's a good main goal to have doing this. I overstand you here.

And as working girls, we may sometimes have little bags under our eyes from being tired that make-up couldn't cover, or even be a little less enthusiastic than we usually are, hell, we might even have some extremely pressing things going on in our personal lives that could possibly be distracting us (because we are still people just like anybody else), but it doesn't mean we are any less interested in you or the task at hand. It just means we're normal....... Originally Posted by Charisma Creams
As long as your stress is in no way displayed and passed on in servicing the client with less than stellar service your main goal can always be achieved. But if you aren't at your best in session mentally or physically you shouldn't do a dishonor to your business and a full price paying client by being less enthusiastic. The clients shouldn't have to incur or experience that. You should take a day off or as long as you need to avoid burnout. Because if you arent motivated and enthusiastic enough in session it will show, we don't know those outside reasons. And not to sound mean.......If a new client knew potentially by you confiding in him that you had family stress or other issues......Im sure as heck they wouldn't book a session as they would realize you couldn't totally unwind your mind from your adversity.

But because we aren't privy to that personal info of yours, and this is a service geared profession you may be critiqued in a review. The review won't involve your personal issues.........an your rates aren't different when you don't deliver.......I guess I'm just one of those guys that don't want to be the unlucky guy on a highly anticipated meet to see a lady and have it be her "bad day."

Besides......your bad day is still a day you got paid your just do. Same rate. A bad session for a client presents no value and his forwarding critique in a review would show it.
SknyDiva's Avatar
COMPASSION IS THE KEY WORD IN THIS THREAD.
Again more useless information.
Wow, you have quite a talent for conveying a thought! Sharing a conversation with you might be just as enjoyable as sharing a session! I'd love to hear more. Obviously it is very painful to give your very best for a client who doesn't appear to appreciate your efforts. I'd like to hope, though, that every now and then, a client is able to effectively convey appreciation for the effort put forth in a session even when expectations weren't quite met. Do you have an example to share of a client who was able to look beyond a less-than-stellar first experience, see the potential, and end up a better client and friend as a result? It's long been said that we as clients get from this experience what we put into it, and patience, compassion, and understanding is just one way to demonstrate it, although perhaps the most challenging way, but also reaping the best rewards. Of course we as clients also assume the risk of having patience and compassion taken advantage of, which I'm afraid happens more often than not ....
annie@christophers's Avatar
SHUT THE FUCK UP UP.. like YEARS ago you fucking cant afford even a 4 hour...(we all know you torture chicks till money is given back/ ya have gotten smarter these years and i aint had it out with ya in what 8 or so..someone can find im sure) in any case your book of knowledge is fucking terrible. CC you are adorable for saying all those things..and i never do..but I DO ADORE your honesty and if these MEN wont say it I WILL...THANK YOU. xxoo annie
SknyDiva's Avatar
I second that motion.
SknyDiva's Avatar
Wow, you have quite a talent for conveying a thought! Sharing a conversation with you might be just as enjoyable as sharing a session! I'd love to hear more. Obviously it is very painful to give your very best for a client who doesn't appear to appreciate your efforts. I'd like to hope, though, that every now and then, a client is able to effectively convey appreciation for the effort put forth in a session even when expectations weren't quite met. Do you have an example to share of a client who was able to look beyond a less-than-stellar first experience, see the potential, and end up a better client and friend as a result? It's long been said that we as clients get from this experience what we put into it, and patience, compassion, and understanding is just one way to demonstrate it, although perhaps the most challenging way, but also reaping the best rewards. Of course we as clients also assume the risk of having patience and compassion taken advantage of, which I'm afraid happens more often than not .... Originally Posted by Pooyie!



Your patience and compassion has been taken advantage of, I'm sorry that has
Happen to you.

I hope you have better exsperiences.
Obviously I am not as good as CC in expressing myself ... but then again few are. I suppose I do have an example from many years ago of taking a risk with a Provider that turned out to be not wise, but I wasn't thinking of it in this post. On the contrary, I'm one of those who still sees opportunities to build better relationships by just "hanging in there" and have more good experiences than bad ... more in my everyday relationships than anywhere else.
turbo-dog's Avatar
I understand all of the sentiments above, but not the purpose of this thread. Was a customer rude or inconsiderate during a session?
I think she was burnt out and maybe something was said. This isnt like a normal job though, you do have the option to take a break, after all you are your own boss. Just take some time to take care of yourself then come back.

Most guys on here do not care, all they care about is what you do for them, not your feelings or issues. Its all about sex and money. They do not want to waste their money on someone who is not on their game that day.

If your not feeling well, not into it that day or week, or feeling tired of it all, just step away. Regardless of what anyone thinks, the hobby is not easy on a woman. We are emotional beings, expected to set all feelings aside in order to please others. And so many times we absorb the negative energy of our clients.

Just be honest with the guy and tell him your not in the mood. Im sure most are used to hearing that from the women in their real life lol
Where is London Rayne for her reality check for keeping RL and Hobbylife separate?

She was the queen for reminding us about that....or am I thinking of someone else?