HIDE THE KY! OMG SOOOO GLAD IM BACK IN AUSTIN!!!

I went to houston for one night, one client and that was enough for me....

The guy was nice enough to pay for gas, a room at 4 star hotel for me and my gf...and a nice amount for two hrs...
I get there and the first red flag was the second room wasnt booked for my gf...but he promptly fixed it and I thought nothing more until we got to the room....Then It was the classic all i have is this now but Ill go to atm n get rest later.....Which he did after a lil bit of a hassle...

Things began to get weird when he and I were both naked and hes pacing/sitting across the room/ watching porn/ talking and moving non stop......


His body was completely unresponsive to any adult stimulation....cuz the porn was pretty hot n i had no trouble becoming "stimulated"....
After an hour of this I was like WTF....
I reminded him of our time left (which i hate to do but i was trying to get the session rolling)...

I noticed frequent bathroom trips but no evidence of any drugs other than weird ass behavior....
At an hr and a half he returns from the bathroom with a towel and starts CHEWING on it while using part of it to cover/rub his body.....again like wtf
He begins to apologize n starts fidgeting .....then he proceeds to tell me he has dry mouth so as i hand him the bottle of water, he grabs the bottle of KY and begins EATING IT!!! DID I MISS SOMETHING IS KY THE NEW H2O??? WTF... Just thought it was something tooo weird not to discuss....

He paid for two hours to sit in a chair chew on a towel and eat KY jelly....

And as i was leaving Htown, he asked if he could come back n see me....too bad i didnt have the room i wouldve bought a case of KY ordered extra towels and just sat back, stifled my laughter and got paid to observe this specimen of a man...Weirder than fiction!
<3Jaylyn

Very weird but hilarious!! I have been needing a really good laugh, lately. Thx for sharing. I'm glad to hear that you are safe back in Austin...

Yes hilarious n extremely bizarre!!! sooo hard not to laugh in the dudes face while he was slurping down that KY like he was a Somalian refugee...

And the slogan is "Keep Austin Weird". Come on Austin, you've got some catching up to do.

Just when you think you've heard it all.......WOW!

that is one funny and odd story Jaylyn!! I too, had thought I had heard them all..

glad you are back!!

see ya soon!

I am touched by the sadness and hopelessness of addiction.

I hope that if your Houston Client is reading this that he sees that sad picture and compares it to his self image.

There is help. I hope he finds it.

I am touched by the sadness and hopelessness of addiction.

I hope that if your Houston Client is reading this that he sees that sad picture and compares it to his self image.

There is help. I hope he finds it. Originally Posted by harkontume

My name is 'John Q. Trick',,, hi John!! and I am KY Lube addict.

Scary, but funny. Glad you made it back.

LMAO, that's funny as hell! Creepy too, though...

Yeah I actually won if you think about it...room paid for paid for time/gas/etc....dude was creepy n it was weird but OK AND ALIVE and thats most important

Sad. Probably an undiagnosed schizophrenic. I've seen quite a few in my life and it's the kind of life that almost guarantees them entry to heaven because they've already been to hell.

You acted right with him. Don't call out his behavior directly and he won't "go off". I am sorry this happened, to you and to him.

lmao...i have similar story....this older gentlemen staff edit...forbidden topic...Spacemtn we attended to begin our session and by the time we got to the room he was unresponsive to antything i did he was on cloud 9 and then he ran to the restroom and sat on the toilet for like 90 mins and then i said look i really have to go now its been long enough and he had already given me 700 and he begged me to stay throughout the morning but i declined i should have took the extra money and took a nap while he sat on the toilet...lol

yeah I figured why bring unnecessary attention/drama/embarrassment to him ....Glad to hear i handled it right makes me feel lots better

yeah...He didnt sit on toilet but now that you mention pills on my way to Htown he asked if i knew where to get viagra b/c he had taken something and was "gonna have trouble getting going at first"...IDK lol