Newbie with questions...

Hello. Sorry if this post is in the wrong place.



I am new to all of this. I'm in my mid-30's, average-looking, but have just never really had serious relationships or hook-ups due to depression/anxiety. So I've been thinking about giving this a try, but I have a few questions...


First, obviously, how do I not end up in fucking jail or murdered or missing a kidney? How many of these posts are real?



Is Eros trustworthy? There's someone I've seen on that site from a neighboring state that I would be willing to try this with, but I have no idea if she's some sort of trap (the Ackbar kind). Does the fact that she shows her face a red flag or is that just preference? Is the fact that she's not on this site a red flag? I searched for her in her state's forum, but she didn't come up.



I keep seeing the Preferred411 site, but apparently they stopped taking new members. Most women ask for references, but I'm not sure how to do that without involving my private life (which I will NOT do). I realize that these women are also trying not to get arrested or killed or worse...



Thanks for any advice.


EDIT: Well, after using the Search function, I found this thread, which is definitely helpful.

First, obviously, how do I not end up in fucking jail or murdered or missing a kidney? How many of these posts are real? Originally Posted by blueballedskeptic

Stick with well established and well reviewed ladies on this site and you will be about as safe as you can be in this sport. Many of if not most of the post by and surrounding the more established ladies are indeed real. When I say well established I mean somebody who has positive reviews continuously from a year or more in the past to the present.

I cant speak on any of the other sites.

There are quite a few ladies that are newby friendly and don't require tons of personal info.

I get where you are coming from though, my first encounter was with a well established lady and all I could think about on my way to the meeting place was "what if this is all one big elaborate setup?". Well it wasn't a setup and she understood the anxiety and put me at ease and we had a blast, or at least I had a blast and she acted like she did. I must have been tolerable because she let me come visit again.

The search function you found is one of the most useful tools at your disposal for here.

As for the ladies posting on here, they are real, have been age verified and typically have a number of Encounter Reports assigned to their profile. Of course, the newer additions are building their numbers, so you may see less reports for them.


One of the most important things to keep in mind when contacting someone that catches your eye is to just be respectful and courteous. Don't ask a series of questions that would make them feel uncomfortable, get the basic info you need from them (time and place) and let them guide you.

Thank you both for the responses and others who sent me PMs. I appreciate the advice!


I will do more searching and talking and see what happens. :-)

You are most welcome. Feel free to reach out if you have any more questions.