From my understanding, in cuckolding either:
1. The husband gets his kinks watching other bulls screw his wife. Okay, she’s not a Dom but could be given the role.
2. The husband loves his wife so much that he wants her to be sexually pleased so he gives his wife over to other bulls.
And what makes it work is the couple consents in having an open marriage. In scenario 2 this makes the wife either a FemDom or FLR (female-led relationships). Jada Pickett Smith is FemDom that cheated on her husband and then got Will to consent. (BTW all of this info is public) He might have consented with his mouth but his heart and actions were, “keep your dick out of my wife’s #%$@ing mouth.
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Well I can tell you I'm no expert on cuckolding. Lol. Lots of folks get dont get the difference between cuckold and hotwife. The second instance you give sounds more like hotwifing. The guy gets pleasure out of seeing his wife pleasure and knowing other men want her. This usually involves a scene just between the two later where she reaffirms her feelings for him, ie tells him he's the best. That's the typical psychology behind it, to my understanding.
Cuckolding usually involves a more degrading edge to the first scene. The dynamics can have variations. Lots of times the husband can be made to feel inadequate and only another can please her. This probably works best when both partners get sexual arousal from the dynamic. Maybe due to feelings of inadequacy on his part and thirst for power on hers. There can obviously be a wide range of intensity due to how far couples like to take this. If the couple has a private scene later it vary from more intense degradation to reconnecting and acceptance for the cycle to start again.
I have witnessed both but only as the third, never as part of the couple as neither the wife or I get any arousal out of degradation or this dynamic. I've seen husbands who watched, talked about what she liked, gave encouragement, and praise to her. I've also seen true cuckolding where the wife berated the husband or he felt the need to talk constantly about how he couldn't please her.
If what led up this is him feeling bad about her sexuality then I do feel sorry for them both. You have to be on the same page for anything like those dynamics to work.