Dissed before even setting appointment

Starboi08's Avatar
This is a first. Was pm ing a provider from Houston who will be traveling here to Dallas next week and out of the blue she just said that she don't think we'll be a good match. I have not said one bad thing to her spelled all my words correctly and used proper grammar. When i asked her why she didn't even respond. I'm not salty or anything like that because I'll just go see someone else. Was just curious if this has ever happened to any of my fellow hobbyists?
needingmilking's Avatar
Sure, all the time. It doesnt to you?
These ladies change their mind rapidly and suddenly...
Shake it off.. oh oh... shake it off...
Are you looking for feedback about how you can improve your chances for next time you contact a provider you are interested in? You said yourself you go see someone else. In that case, do just that. Curious why you posted this. If you wanted to get a conversation started about the reasons why a provider might decline to see someone or go radio silent then that's a topic.
CG2014's Avatar
What's her name?
She doesn't have to give you a reason why she doesn't want to see you but not responding to your question at all and ignoring you is rude. She could have at least replied saying that she doesn't feel comfortable giving a reason and ended it there. Please PM me the name of this provider so I can avoid her.
Did you provide references to her already? Maybe she read your posts and reviews. Some providers use what we say here to screen us
mrredcat43's Avatar
Was it Dorthy?
Please remember that your posting history connected to your ECCIE handle is searchable. I have declined gentleman in the past due to the way they represented themselves on the board.
GingerKatt's Avatar
Please remember that your posting history connected to your ECCIE handle is searchable. I have declined gentleman in the past due to the way they represented themselves on the board. Originally Posted by charlotteblue
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+1 Charlotte! And BTW I love your signature posts. Why would anyone attempt to understand a woman? No fun in that. And Jjsmooth82, that may be all you need to understand about the lady in question. Sure it's a business, but it's also OUR BODIES, AS WELL AS OUR SAFETY. We don't owe you a reason.

And of course all men compensate women for companionship, be it a housewife, eHarmony date, or any other type of encounter. If a caveman didn't bring home a Bison, he didn't get any.
Starboi08's Avatar
Are you looking for feedback about how you can improve your chances for next time you contact a provider you are interested in? You said yourself you go see someone else. In that case, do just that. Curious why you posted this. If you wanted to get a conversation started about the reasons why a provider might decline to see someone or go radio silent then that's a topic. Originally Posted by charlotteblue
Ummmm how about because i wanted to? I don't rarely post threads on here so think I'm entitled to one if thats ok with u? I was wondering if this happened to anyone else. This does not even pertain to u. And FYI it was a P411 request not eccie.
GingerKatt's Avatar
Ummmm how about because i wanted to? I don't rarely post threads on here so think I'm entitled to one if thats ok with u? I was wondering if this happened to anyone else. This does not even pertain to u. And FYI it was a P411 request not eccie. Originally Posted by Jjsmooth82
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It DOES pertain to her, notsosmooth. YOU started the thread and asked for opinions. You're going to get them. And I agree with Charlotte, are you butt hurt and whining, complaining about a provider, or genuinely wanting feedback on how to improve your chances of passing screening? Confusing.

And BTW, you're crying about not getting a reason. How about when you posted that she told you, "I DON'T THINK WE'D BE A GOOD MATCH".? That's a REASON. She knows her preferred clientele a little better than you do. Smoooooooth..... Its just not really all about your grammar and all the proper words. How silly. You call yourself a boy. I definitely believe that. And, see, most women prefer grown men.
We should not be offended when a Provider decides not to see us. We have a plethora of reasons we choose not to see a Provider. She is too big, she doesn't do this or that, she has bad TCB, etc. The list is way too long to post here. Those providers should not take offense to us not wanting to see them. I am personally not attracted to BBW women. It doesn't mean they are bad at what they do. It simply means I know in advance that we would not have any chemistry. They should not take offense and just move on and find another hobbiest. With us, most of those reasons are physical. Although part of this is about the exchange of $ for services, that is not the entire reason for a good number of Providers. They still want to enjoy their jobs. That doesn't mean I am saying you are bad in bed. I am not saying that at all. What I am saying is that for women it is not all physical. They have different ques for what helps them with chemistry. Something in her research lead her to believe that the two of you would not have good chemistry.

Be thankful she helped you save your money. Do not take offense to it and find another Provider.

Now that I have said all of that. I also know I have not had the issue of a Provider telling me that she did not want to see me. I do admit it will be a personal mental struggle when it happens ... and I am sure it will. Hopefully I will be able to take my own advice.

Long story short ... if this is the 1st time, don't be offended and move on. If it happens a lot, then I suggest working hard to figure out why.
A P411 request is great. However it doesn't automatically guarantee a lady might see you. To be honest, I wasn't trying to insult you, Mr. Smooth. However, if your handle was indicative of your behavior and actions in scoring a date with said provider, I don't think we'd be discussing this.
MarkusH's Avatar
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If a caveman didn't bring home a Bison, he didn't get any. Originally Posted by GingerKatt
Hercules's Avatar
If you've been at this long enough you'll see it doesn't take much to spook someone, hobbyist or provider. You may have said something to make her think you're LE. Or maybe a phrase you used made her think she knows you in real life. In correspondence it's best to be short, sweet and to the point. Leave the jibber-jabber until after ya boinked her and y'all are lying in bed all hot and sweaty.