...if you want to have even better sex, check out these scientific facts illustrated further in this article:
1) Tell her she looks and tastes great
2) Use your ears and listen
3) Touch her everywhere
4) Eat foods that are considered aphrodisiacs ('cus they really are!)
5) Take your time undressing
6) Take a shower
7) Turn the lights down
8) Sit back and relax
9) Don't stress about the actual penetration part of sex
10) Get her pregnant ***I don't recommend this one in the demimonde!!***
- LynetteMarie
- 08-31-2010, 06:24 PM
- charlestudor2005
- 08-31-2010, 07:33 PM
- Chaz108
- 08-31-2010, 07:52 PM
- Laurentius
- 09-01-2010, 11:53 AM
Great advice!
Of course, what is being described is making love with a woman rather than being serviced.
Not all providers have a business model conducive to this, and I strongly suspect most of the hobby isn't oriented that way. It seems more oriented toward "Get him verified, get him laid, get him gone."
Of course, I don't speak from experience in that regard. I only see a small number of ladies and try to see them multiple times. As I deal with them as whole people and see the fee more as facilitating a lifestyle that allows us to be together than as payment for service; it's more conducive to what you are suggesting.
Of course, what is being described is making love with a woman rather than being serviced.
Not all providers have a business model conducive to this, and I strongly suspect most of the hobby isn't oriented that way. It seems more oriented toward "Get him verified, get him laid, get him gone."
Of course, I don't speak from experience in that regard. I only see a small number of ladies and try to see them multiple times. As I deal with them as whole people and see the fee more as facilitating a lifestyle that allows us to be together than as payment for service; it's more conducive to what you are suggesting.
- WTF
- 09-01-2010, 12:08 PM
[quote=Laurentius;551986]. As I deal with them as whole people and see the fee more as facilitating a lifestyle that allows us to be together than as payment for service; quote]
Really, they are whole people?
As to your second point....please let me know when you decide to quit the payment for service part and try and continue with the lifestyle/togetherness part and let me know how that turns out.
Really, they are whole people?
As to your second point....please let me know when you decide to quit the payment for service part and try and continue with the lifestyle/togetherness part and let me know how that turns out.
- Laurentius
- 09-01-2010, 02:14 PM
[quote=WTF;552022]
Let me address the payment aspect first.
Pretend that provider X is a skilled physician's assistant. Rather than doing that, she decides to be a provider.
Now, if she weren't being paid as a provider, she'd have to go back to being a PA so she could keep a roof over her head.
So the fact she is paid facilitates a lifestyle wherein she has the capacity to spend time with me. Otherwise, she'd be too busy working as a PA to be able to see me.
The payment is an indispensible aspect of the lifestyle, so why would I skip it?
In addition, in civie life, in exchange for sex a woman typically wants things outside of money. Things like a relationship, a commitment, undying devotion and stuff.
A provider foregoes the rights she would normally have as a civie to try to turn me into her boyfriend, etc. Instead, she accepts a fee.
While I will admit to some OTC time with some ladies; I have never accepted OTC sex time. And the reason is because sex sans compensation is a prelude to requirements for relationship, commitment, etc. in most cases.
I already know how sex sans compensation works. It's a clear sign that somebody is going to be hurt emotionally one way or another. So why would I go there?
Now to address the whole people comment.
Everybody is a whole person by definition.
But when you deal with the guy at the deli, the cashier at the supermarket or a carpenter you bring in for home improvements; you generally engage only a small part of who and what they are. Basically, you engage them primarily in the function that is economically valuable to you.
As a low volume hobbyist, I have the luxury of engaging providers outside of the function that is economically valuable to me. Of course, sex time is compensated. As noted earlier, that's necessary. But outside of that, I tend not to deal with providers solely in their economically useful role. (I only engage providers where such dealings are mutually beneficial.) Over time I've done everything from handling their court cases (I don't typically work in that role, but sometimes I do) to assisting with putting together materials for a class one planned to teach.
The point is that, when I have hopped into bed with a lady I've engaged in that way, there is really no doubt in her mind that I value her, personally and uniquely yet without even a hint of possessiveness.
So perhaps instead of saying I deal with them as whole people; a better way of saying it would be that the fact I value them personally and uniquely is evident.
Obviously, the flip side of this is I see very few providers. And yes, the sexual engagement is definitely qualitatively different than with providers that I have incidentally booked for a once-off one-hour bcd session.
. As I deal with them as whole people and see the fee more as facilitating a lifestyle that allows us to be together than as payment for service; quote]It seems I should expand on these points to make them better understood. I didn't explain mine well enough.
Really, they are whole people?
As to your second point....please let me know when you decide to quit the payment for service part and try and continue with the lifestyle/togetherness part and let me know how that turns out.
Let me address the payment aspect first.
Pretend that provider X is a skilled physician's assistant. Rather than doing that, she decides to be a provider.
Now, if she weren't being paid as a provider, she'd have to go back to being a PA so she could keep a roof over her head.
So the fact she is paid facilitates a lifestyle wherein she has the capacity to spend time with me. Otherwise, she'd be too busy working as a PA to be able to see me.
The payment is an indispensible aspect of the lifestyle, so why would I skip it?
In addition, in civie life, in exchange for sex a woman typically wants things outside of money. Things like a relationship, a commitment, undying devotion and stuff.
A provider foregoes the rights she would normally have as a civie to try to turn me into her boyfriend, etc. Instead, she accepts a fee.
While I will admit to some OTC time with some ladies; I have never accepted OTC sex time. And the reason is because sex sans compensation is a prelude to requirements for relationship, commitment, etc. in most cases.
I already know how sex sans compensation works. It's a clear sign that somebody is going to be hurt emotionally one way or another. So why would I go there?
Now to address the whole people comment.
Everybody is a whole person by definition.
But when you deal with the guy at the deli, the cashier at the supermarket or a carpenter you bring in for home improvements; you generally engage only a small part of who and what they are. Basically, you engage them primarily in the function that is economically valuable to you.
As a low volume hobbyist, I have the luxury of engaging providers outside of the function that is economically valuable to me. Of course, sex time is compensated. As noted earlier, that's necessary. But outside of that, I tend not to deal with providers solely in their economically useful role. (I only engage providers where such dealings are mutually beneficial.) Over time I've done everything from handling their court cases (I don't typically work in that role, but sometimes I do) to assisting with putting together materials for a class one planned to teach.
The point is that, when I have hopped into bed with a lady I've engaged in that way, there is really no doubt in her mind that I value her, personally and uniquely yet without even a hint of possessiveness.
So perhaps instead of saying I deal with them as whole people; a better way of saying it would be that the fact I value them personally and uniquely is evident.
Obviously, the flip side of this is I see very few providers. And yes, the sexual engagement is definitely qualitatively different than with providers that I have incidentally booked for a once-off one-hour bcd session.
- atlcomedy
- 09-01-2010, 03:01 PM
....
(meant with all due respect, but) Laurenitus, you put a lot of words around how selective you are and how much you value your companions and that is great, but at the end of the day I don't think that is any different than most guys that partake in extended dates.
Clearlythe dynamic is different for someone on a half hour or hour "Fuck & Run," but anyone that chooses to spend a half a day or more with another human being is looking for more than a warm body.
(meant with all due respect, but) Laurenitus, you put a lot of words around how selective you are and how much you value your companions and that is great, but at the end of the day I don't think that is any different than most guys that partake in extended dates.
Clearlythe dynamic is different for someone on a half hour or hour "Fuck & Run," but anyone that chooses to spend a half a day or more with another human being is looking for more than a warm body.
- atlcomedy
- 09-01-2010, 03:07 PM
1) Tell her she looks and tastes greatWe joke a lot on here about the false flattery on the part of some of the actresses ("oh you are so BIG!" or moans of orgasmic extasy), but I'll contend women, even beautiful ones, are much more insecure about their bodies than men. Simple reassurance goes a long way.
Originally Posted by LynetteMarie
- WTF
- 09-01-2010, 04:09 PM
[quote=Laurentius;552360]
Why do you think that the extra time after sex is a factor in how one is viewed as far as 'wholeness'?
That seems rather self-absorbed. Be like the bank robbery thinking that taking the teller out for french fries after robbing her will make everything all-right.
Either the act as a WHOLE is acceptable or not. I contend that the act is indeed a-ok without any other extra get to know time issues. If you need it to justify the act then maybe you need to look into that issue. I can engage a waitress in her services without having to take her for a walk in the park to get to know her. I bet the same can be said of a decent blow-job.
Are you saying that the more one makes, the better they feel about themselves? That is pretty universial no matter what the services, up to a point now wouldn't you agree? I'll not debate that.
But when you deal with the guy at the deli, the cashier at the supermarket or a carpenter you bring in for home improvements; you generally engage only a small part of who and what they are. Basically, you engage them primarily in the function that is economically valuable to YOU .
As a low volume hobbyist, I have the luxury of engaging providers outside of the function that is economically valuable to ME . Originally Posted by WTF
Why do you think that the extra time after sex is a factor in how one is viewed as far as 'wholeness'?
That seems rather self-absorbed. Be like the bank robbery thinking that taking the teller out for french fries after robbing her will make everything all-right.
Either the act as a WHOLE is acceptable or not. I contend that the act is indeed a-ok without any other extra get to know time issues. If you need it to justify the act then maybe you need to look into that issue. I can engage a waitress in her services without having to take her for a walk in the park to get to know her. I bet the same can be said of a decent blow-job.
Are you saying that the more one makes, the better they feel about themselves? That is pretty universial no matter what the services, up to a point now wouldn't you agree? I'll not debate that.
- Laurentius
- 09-01-2010, 06:23 PM
....Naturally, we agree because you are right.
(meant with all due respect, but) Laurenitus, you put a lot of words around how selective you are and how much you value your companions and that is great, but at the end of the day I don't think that is any different than most guys that partake in extended dates.
Clearlythe dynamic is different for someone on a half hour or hour "Fuck & Run," but anyone that chooses to spend a half a day or more with another human being is looking for more than a warm body. Originally Posted by atlcomedy
:-)
- Laurentius
- 09-01-2010, 06:26 PM
I should clarify, WTF, that I am drawing no moral distinctions whatsoever between the way people hobby or provide so long as everything is consensual.
The point I'm getting at is that 99% of sex is between the ears and there is most definitely a difference in the degree to which people enjoy it based upon a variety of environmental factors.
In addition, I am applying what could be a general rule that applies to any endeavor -- college, hobbying, business, etc.: you get out of something what you put into it.
That is not a moralistic doctrine. Rather, it is an idea.
Certain types of sessions and providers are more conducive to certain hobbyist activities than others. That's just a matter of reality.
[quote=WTF;552739]
The point I'm getting at is that 99% of sex is between the ears and there is most definitely a difference in the degree to which people enjoy it based upon a variety of environmental factors.
In addition, I am applying what could be a general rule that applies to any endeavor -- college, hobbying, business, etc.: you get out of something what you put into it.
That is not a moralistic doctrine. Rather, it is an idea.
Certain types of sessions and providers are more conducive to certain hobbyist activities than others. That's just a matter of reality.
[quote=WTF;552739]
Why do you think that the extra time after sex is a factor in how one is viewed as far as 'wholeness'?
That seems rather self-absorbed. Be like the bank robbery thinking that taking the teller out for french fries after robbing her will make everything all-right.
Either the act as a WHOLE is acceptable or not. I contend that the act is indeed a-ok without any other extra get to know time issues. If you need it to justify the act then maybe you need to look into that issue. I can engage a waitress in her services without having to take her for a walk in the park to get to know her. I bet the same can be said of a decent blow-job.
Are you saying that the more one makes, the better they feel about themselves? That is pretty universial no matter what the services, up to a point now wouldn't you agree? I'll not debate that. Originally Posted by Laurentius
- WTF
- 09-01-2010, 07:36 PM
you get out of something what you put into it. Originally Posted by LaurentiusWas that a pun?
Bold words in this realm!If you are saying that there is something for everyone , than I wholly agree
That is not a moralistic doctrine. Rather, it is an idea.
Certain types of sessions and providers are more conducive to certain hobbyist activities than others. That's just a matter of reality.
Originally Posted by Laurentius
But what you might want to ponder is that not 99% of sex is between the ears for everyone. It might be for you and it might be for me but don't you think that is a pretty broad statement to hold up for everyone? You pay a woman to hop into bed with you and you think it is evident that you value THEIR thoughts because you pay for even more time with them to make youself feel better about yourself by making them feel valued for something other than sex, even though you are having sex with them and getting to know them improves your 99% sex between the brain doctrine errrrrrr, idea ....this sounds like Strausberg method school of acting!
The point is that, when I have hopped into bed with a lady I've engaged in that way, there is really no doubt in her mind that I value her, personally and uniquely yet without even a hint of possessiveness.
So perhaps instead of saying I deal with them as whole people; a better way of saying it would be that the fact I value them personally and uniquely is evident.
. Originally Posted by Laurentius
- charlestudor2005
- 09-01-2010, 07:50 PM
....I kinda disagree, alt. I think L has developed his sessions to be rather long and unique. I wish I could apply that model to see if it works for me, especially with a small number of providers there. But, alas, for me it is impossible. For me it is what dreams are made of...
(meant with all due respect, but) Laurenitus, you put a lot of words around how selective you are and how much you value your companions and that is great, but at the end of the day I don't think that is any different than most guys that partake in extended dates.
Clearlythe dynamic is different for someone on a half hour or hour "Fuck & Run," but anyone that chooses to spend a half a day or more with another human being is looking for more than a warm body. Originally Posted by atlcomedy
- WTF
- 09-01-2010, 08:05 PM
- atlcomedy
- 09-01-2010, 08:09 PM