References, Lying and Fees?

When contacting a lady you wish to see for the first time, please have your references ready and please let the ladies who you are using as your reference know you are doing so. A lot of ladies do not give references without any type of notice from the gent. I know I don't.

How do you feel about cancellation fees? Do you think its fair to pay a certain fee for when you cancel without proper notice?

Also....when you cancel on a lady and give a lame excuse, keep in mind that we ladies do talk and we do end up finding out when you decide to cancel on one to meet with another. What is the reasoning for lying about it? I don't understand it.

Refs:

I give a heads up that "Elena, would it be ok for Ms. XYZ to contact you for a reference. " Am I the exception?

Cancelling:
It could they don't want to hurt the first woman's feelings. Maybe another provider undercut the price. Having a cancel could be tough to recover. Mind you when I visited a certain Nebraska city and had extended an invitation to a young lady to see me, she was in transit to me when she "got a flat tire." I took it as true but there was a lingering feeling that it wasn't true. (no not you Elena, we had an awesome time when we met) So it does go both ways.

One of my few cancellations was the result of a car accident. A car in the center lane pushed into me. Couple a grand worth of damage AND I had blue balls. I did call the woman to tell her what happened.

If it a no show no call, then I can understand ladies sharing info.

SR,

You're one of the few guys who will do the heads up in giving references. I've ran into so many ladies who will not give a reference without the gent letting them know first. I changed my policy on giving references because I've had a few wives call in the past 6 months and it freaks me a little when a lady contacts me and I don't know who she is. Plus, sometimes I'm not at my computer to research the provider contacting me to make sure she's legit.

As for cancelling.....

I can understand not wanting to hurt the ladies feelings. Even if he or other gents who have cancelled on me or other ladies are trying not to hurt our feelings for whatever reason, just be honest. He must've been interested enough to make the initial call in the first place. But, for the guys who have done this (use lame excuses) just remember, some of those ladies have great memories and the next time you'll want to see her, she'll remember and say no.

I have hardly ever had to cancel on a client or push back our meeting time, but if I had to do, I've always given them a discount to make up for the inconvience.

I found a saying years ago that stands true, "I'd rather be hurt by the truth than protected by a lie."

I have never contacted a provider to make sure they are willing to give a reference for me. I will start doing that from now on, does seem like the proper thing to do, Thanks Elena.
Canceling an appointment is probably the biggest reason I do not see as many providers as I wish to. My work is the problem. Have canceled couple times because I was called to work at the last minute, I am always on call, always call provider when this happens. Hope they believe me and understand. So with that is difficult for me to prebook or schedule time in advance. When I know will be free for couple hours I try and find a provider that is available. That has gotten me in trouble few times.
I understand same day appointments, and more so "can we meet now" are difficult for providers. Also most of my free time is in the morning even more difficult to get a call back from a provider for a meet now appointment in the morning.

I have contacted a provider about supplying references the very few times I have done that in the past. Helps remind them about who I am and I can understand they do appreciate the heads up on that.

Cancellation fees? I don't think that's right in this business, unless there was a prior arrangement or understanding of such. At times there can be too many unpredictables on both sides. Cost of doing business, I'd say. But I'm willing to listen.

As far as cancelling, I have only had to do that one or two times, and with quite the advance notice. Just common courtesy. But I've also waited an hour only to get a call that "I'm not far" and then wait another 45 minutes or so. My mistake, I know.
But I wouldn't lie about something like that, because I'd hope to have an encounter in the future at some point.

My schedule is such that I can't plan too far ahead at all. Or I might suddenly have the time and opportunity open up and I will try to take advantage of it and contact someone.

This is getting a bit off topic, but sometimes I will call and try to inquire if someone is actually in town, as an ad indicates. Half the time they are not, so it's good to call. Or if no rates are available, I will inquire, which at times has gotten me a hang up. Sorry, but I need to know what to expect and what is possible. Just asking about length of session and donation for such, no particulars.

As Saxcat81 mentions above, sometimes a guy will have to try to contact someone about a short or sudden "window" that has just opened up. And I can sometimes have those windows opened in the morning, but I can't plan on it the night before.
I guess if it happens it will happen.

I have never heard of a provider paying a cancellation fee. When they start I may consider it too. What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

But a cancellation took away opportunity of others being able to enjoy Elena's company (virtual cockblocking? ). Now it may have indeed been an emergency, but it doesn't sound it.

I will tell a lady up front that if my schedule is such that I might have to reschedule (I hate to actually cancel). But if I am setting up a tryst in the first place I've already blanked the time for the date.

SR,

Darlin', I had made an edit to my second post and took that part out. It was wrong of me to air a complaint like that in public and I never air those types of complaints for others, men or women to see. I prefer to mumble in the privacy of my home and take those frustrations out on a Wii game. lol

Thank you though.


I appreciate the answers guys.

My thoughts on cancellation fees is that if the appt is cancelled within a decent time frame, no worries. But, when you get into 2 hr or longer sessions, I think its fair to give the lady some type of fee because she did block out that time frame for you and probably declined other gents.

Sax and Mutual:

A good way to have those small window time frames easier for the provider is to get "pre verified" with her. Pick out a lady whom you'd like to see, tell her exactly what you stated above and ask her to "pre verify" you. Also ask her if she does same day or short notice appts. That way you can have most of all the business taken care of.

I do that with my out of town clients, when I tour and/or my soon to be clients that have crazy work schedules. That way he can call, set the appt and we're all happy.


Omahan,

So when pigs fly huh?

I have emailed many providers to pre verify. More often then not their reply is, give me a date, time and length of visit. Will not pre verify unless have a set time to met. As mentioned before I can not do not 95% of the time. Guess will have to send my references to Elena so that's taken care of.

Omahan,

So when pigs fly huh? Originally Posted by MsElena

That's the plan.

I often try to pre-verify. Have yet to have a lady respond when I say my email was to pre-verify. If it's not a hard date request, most don't answer. And I mean, they don't even have the courtesy to answer.

Omahan, I'm with you bro!

I have never heard of a provider paying a cancellation fee. When they start I may consider it too. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. Originally Posted by Omahan

At most all times (although, I may not always carry them with me from my home to a "local" incall in the KC metro area), especially when I travel, I generally will have one or two pre-loaded gift cards (Olive Garden, Omaha Steaks, Target, etc.) available in the off chance that IF I have to cancel a pre-booked, verified and confirmed appointment, I have something to immediately offer the client for his inconvenience. I don't offer cash, but I have bought a client dinner or a steak once or twice over the years on the VERY infrequent occasion when circumstance(s) has made it impossible for me to see someone and I have had to cancel with little or no notice. In fact, I published this policy in a thread on ASPD, probably over two or two and a half years ago in a discussion about what happens if you have to turn away a client at the door (totally different topic, but the policy is the same). I have been accused of working my business much differently than many other ladies (believe me, that is a GOOD thing), and I work VERY professionally (upscale incall locations, all inclusive rates, refreshments, ensuring a client gets all the time they have paid for . . I even put out mints and disposable toothbrushes). More often than not, on the rare occasion this has happened, the client will politely decline the offer of the gift - but I don't expect that they will - I offer it, and fully expect them to accept it as a token of my appreciation for their compliment of desiring to see me professionally and my apology for having to either reschedule, postpone or cancel our meeting. I've even slipped a gift card into a client's coat pocket after they have refused it . . . If I offer it, it is because I WANT to give it to you - I WANT you to have it!

Of course, I RARELY cancel last minute, but occasionally it really IS unavoidable. There are too many variables (that may have a negative impact) a lady encounters in this endeavor and I am always prepared for any contingency. I may cancel a day or two in advance due to weather or a personal matter - and if I do I will always offer a discount to reschedule or offer more time when I see the client next . . . but any last minute cancellation is always met with my offering something in the form of a cancellation "fee" . . . when it is MY fault and my fault alone to have to withdraw from a scheduled meeting, I believe it is only fair to make a gesture to the client!

On the other hand . . . If the client's cancellation has cost me real money (for instance, if they have booked multiple hours and I have extended a hotel stay specifically to see them or checked in somewhere for THAT meeting only and they have subsequently had to cancel our rendezvous), I will politely ask them to cover the expense(s) I have incurred . . . And, more often than not, most all will make a gesture to cover those real costs. If they do not, they find I don't answer their calls or emails. For most gentlemen that have seen me once, that is all the incentive they need to "make it right" and guarantee that they will see me again. If it hasn't actually impacted my pocketbook, I generally let it go - although, there are some clients I do hold to a higher standard and frankly, I don't give them a second chance unless they make an overture to offer me something for my time (an example of this would be a cancellation - less than 24 hours - from a client that may be an online acquaintance, or a new client that has canceled after I have spent a good amount of time and energy screening him, etc.).

As a further example, there is a gentleman in Omaha I have seen SEVERAL times and he has become quite a regular caller, however, on a recent visit I had to depart suddenly and with very little advance warning - I was actually on my way out of town before he had crossed town to make it to my incall . . . I left him an envelope at the desk under an assumed name with a "password" to pick it up . . . he left with a $100 gift card to Darden restaurants along with a scented, personal note explaining my cancellation and I kept a $600/month client happy. By the way, that $100 made its way back to me as a tip the next time I was in town (prior to Christmas) . . . what goes around, comes around. Thank you - you know who you are, and I know you are probably reading this!

It is ALL about service. I know Elena understands this, and so do a small handful of others . . . but too many ladies just don't "get it".

Kisses,

- Jackie

So Jackie, when will you be out East (like, say, um, Connecticut?)

And that is customer service. You obviously know how to exceed expectations (to use a cliché). I have had a morning of cancellation(s) as well as a day before (and the aforementioned flat tire), and while I am disappointed that I will not be meeting my date I too understand the unavoidable. Stuff happens.You giving a gift card goes above and beyond a reasonable apology.

Happy New Year to ya and Elena!!!

Jackie, you, Elena and ladies like the two of you are pro's in the nicest sense of the word.
I know some will quibble with this statement but it seems to me that most of the courtesy issues stem from younger and newer providers. And yes, I know that some older providers are guilty and some younger are good about taking care of business in a proper way.

John,

Thank you for the compliment.

The young ladies are great to look at, maybe even great BCD, but they're still learning how to deal with the clients. Sometimes they don't know how to handle certain situations because they don't see this as a business and maybe view it as just a way to make some quick cash. Guys will usually go for the pretty faces/bodies first because the little head is doing the thinking.

This is a business for me, but I'm not all business BCD or a robot. I know that the gents wanting to see me have to make excuses for the time they're with me and I will always make things right with them. All I ask in return is that they respect my time and efforts.