Getting What You Want.

I was doing some reflecting, and thought about what makes me happiest as a provider. Providers all have their own unique specialities, styles and/or things we are known for... The good ones anyway.

Having said that, I've realized my strengths and weaknesses as a provider--What I am and am not etc.

I really like it when a client knows what he wants. I like it when he studies up on me and knows what to expect and utilizes my capabilities to make his fantasies come true.


Just like any job, I think most people like being able to utilize all their skills and talents. If those talents don't get exercised you may become bored or feel like a sports car that just gets driven around the block once every couple of weeks!

Having said all of that, do you hobbyists take these things into consideration when making a date? Or do you just see body, rates, availability and jump in?! I'm all for letting things happen organically, but a bit of planning is awesome!

Maybe knowing and examining what you like and matching yourself to that type of provider would be beneficial in getting what you want?!

I'm all for organic, but I swear the best dates/sessions have always been ones where my client knows what he likes and isn't afraid to communicate his desires, dislikes, personal interests and a bit about himself.

I like knowing a bit about you before we meet. I think having a little bit of a connection goes a long way. It just makes things better, imo.

I'm not telling anyone how they should do things. I'm just suggesting maybe if some of you guys took a little bit more time to introduce yourselves and what your wants/ needs are, that your sessions with providers might go from good to over the top!!

Just some thoughts.
Iron Butterfly's Avatar
SDR, I agree with you and this works great with a provider that one has seen many times and they know each other BCD. As to new dates this is a little more difficult. I always get to know who I will be having a date with. I don't just see a pair of legs and want what is between them. I have always been one that dates the ladies on this broad as I get to know them here my desire grows. Telling a provider what you like or what you want does not always work, some remember some give you the blank stair.

I tend to like to be spontaneous during a first date, if I say I want to lick you in our initial corispondance she knows I'm wanting to lick her and I may have requests as to what she wears and what I want her to do. But mostly it is just sex and I want to connect in a sexual way, not to say that I stray and things go a different way then planed. I have done the whole GFE to a pretty high level and it was amazing but I think this time it is the thrill of tasting some new huney, that may change.

Nothing better to hear a provider say, " so you want to lick me" when we meet. This tells me she has been paying attention and just doesn't see me as " Next".

I think creativity in a providers performance goes a long way in fulfilling the fantasy. The burden is mostly on the provider to perform as we are not expected to but most enjoy being good for the providers they see rather then just going threw the motions, you such me, I eat you, I do you in doggy, you take my load in the mouth. This can be done in such a hot and sensual way that leaves both thrilled, if just for a moment.

The best ones intuitly pick up on what you desire and perform accordingly, hopefully they do there resurch and don't just see us as a time scheduled in ther day.

IB
mrhappysf's Avatar
I am an overly analytical person and do a ton of research to try and find a good match. I don't have much free time to hobby so really need to be sure I find someone who I think will match my interests. The other thing that you and a few other ladies have recommended for us P411 members is to fill out our profile. We can be pretty clear and explicit about what we are into and the lady can learn that without us having to directly ask during a session. I'm always a little bummed if I'm I the process of scheduling a session and see the lady hasn't looked at my profile since I let them know I have one and they should look at it. We are always told to "read my ad; read my showcase" so it upsets me a little that some don't try and do the same research on us. Having said all this, it can also be fun (usually with somone you've seen before) to just get explicit during a session as it is sort of dirty talking, but not fake - just very explicit communication.
Great topic and has a lot to do with how I enjoy the hobby and the relationships I've enjoyed over the years. If the effort is not made beforehand to communicate such things...it becomes rote. And rote can get old and stale in a hurry.

I don't let just anyone play with my dick transplant....
The Allnighter's Avatar
...as long as I don't talk too much, Sweetie.
DallasRain's Avatar
quote--

I really like it when a client knows what he wants. I like it when he studies up on me and knows what to expect and utilizes my capabilities to make his fantasies come true.



exactly--ditto!!
illuminati's Avatar
I do my research, too. I check to see if there are any "no" recommendations and read what caused it but then I compare it to the many "yes" to determine if she's worth contacting. If the provider has a history of NCNS then it isn't much of a consideration on my part. Once I pinpoint my selection then I make my final decision based on how well the provider responds to my PMs, texts, or emails. If she's straight to the point giving me basic info and no conversation then I am out. But if she reciprocates conversation and stimulates my intellect then I'm in. I know what I want and I get it 98% of the time I get it.
I was just thinking out loud.
It is somewhat of a balancing act expressing our desires, but being careful in initial contact, because of the law. Sigh. That is where the intuition & spontaneity comes in, on our part during session as providers. Sometimes, I'm guilty of being "businessy" through correspondence, because I don't want to get in trouble. Especially if it's a new person and he asks something explicit or if I'm busy with family I might be a little terse in my reply, but I'm not that way in person. I don't know if it really helps to prevent potential legal trouble by writing your desires in "fantasy format" but I like that idea. As long as you don't mention money.

mrhappysf- I try really hard to read post history, p411, the type of girls reviewed etc. It works pretty well for me.

@The Allnighter- I'm soo guilty of being a chatter box with people like yourself! Ya just have to shove something in my mouth, smack me on the butt and I'll shut up. Kidding. Kinda .

Iron Butterfly, my train of thought is that if there is some communication besides, "I want to see you. When are you available?" before the first session, their will more likely be a second session and lead to greater hobby experiences.
tzv13's Avatar
  • tzv13
  • 07-10-2015, 03:09 PM
This is a great thread. All good valid points and suggestions about making a session an actual experience.
knotty man's Avatar
i usually begin my initial texts with....
Dear Penthouse,
i never thought this would happen to me, but i ordered a pizza......
ck1942's Avatar
imho, much of the hobby experience devolves from a diminished amount of intimacy at home more than a diminished sexual relationship.

The smart and savvy s.o.'s pay attention to the more important intimacy side of things... Sex is the frosting on top of the intimacy cake.

Note that in the above there is no gender mentioned!
Great Thread Ms SDR. I am learning from this exchange and appreciate your starting the discussion. We should have more thread like this...
dodger's Avatar
something brings a lady to my attention .. page on p411, eccie showcase, possibly a post though I don't read forums very often (what led me to read your posting is a little convoluted .. but I'm odd that way), perhaps the lady was in chat, or a "hobby bro" sends a "you really need consider" msg. so ... now she is on my radar.

i have a pretty descriptive profile on p411, so i hope she is on that site. if she is, i will send her a 'saying hello' msg .. a little about where i am in the booking process. i ask her to read my profile and tell me if she thinks we would enjoy each other. how she replies is very important to me.

one reason for this is .. i'm a fussy old man. some ladies say i'm just very selective .. no .. i'm a fussy old man. i want a good match because i'm not the guy i was 5 or 8 years ago. i'm 70 now .. and the SS Studmuffin has sailed, never to return to these shores. a lady has a session with me, there will be no head board banging, no pearl necklace .. when we are done, the sheets will likely still have their original crease.

OP mentioned being a sports car only taken out and driving around the block. for me .. a session with most ladies would be like me taking a ferrari out on i-35 .. scooting over the left lane .. the coasting at a cool 30MPH. that is .. what i am afraid of .. so i want the lady to know what i am .. and make sure she is comfortable providing an exceptional experience for me. i often think i hear them saying "baby steps .... baby steps" ... and not "fuck me harder daddy, with your big dick .... does daddy love his little slut?"

i'm looking for the unicorn .. but my unicorn tends to be more mature, possibly older, thicker .. some soft places .. toned ... but still curvy, laid back, good at reading me and communicating with me. i put a lot of emphasis on connection which means communication.

i pay a lot of attention to how the lady describes herself. i'm looking for a woman who comes across as comfortable and confident with who they are. few things are more attractive to me than a confident woman. when i read reviews .. i'm paying attention to activities, sure, physical description, sure .. but how did the client feel in the company of this lady.

short story ... not looking for .. don't want the PSE. want the mattress actress who can deliver a genuine (or appears to be genuine .. i did say acting was acceptable) consistent gfe for 1.5 to 2 hrs .. i rarely book less. i take my time .. i'm only driving 30 MPH. takes me longer to get there.

i just arrived in the austin area .. most of my hobbying is DFW centered .. but i don't see as it should be any different, here. and i have really enjoyed my appointments ... ladies have been great to me. and i respect and outright adore them. i appreciate the generous nature of a woman who is willing to lie naked, next to me .. smooch and other activities .. making me feel that she is happy to be doing whatever it is we choose to do with each other (again .. i point out .. i said acting is acceptable .. possibly required). i appreciate, adore, and (hobby) love them for it.

i'm the first to admit i couldn't do it. i kind of pity the lady who opens the door to me, a saggy, scarred senior citizen .. and has to act like she is looking forward to a hot time. that she is .. in some way ... attracted to me (a big thank you to dead presidents, b. franklin, and sometimes a. hamilton). that would be like me .. opening to door and seeing roseann barr and saying .. 'damn .. you're hot .. let's ride'.

.. in my sessions .. ladies make the rules. i don't fuss. because if the lady is not completely comfortable with me .. the session will suffer. these puts even more pressure on the 'get it right' selection process.

so .. there you are ... the dodger selection process .. if you got this far .. and didn't toss your cookies ... i congratulate you ... and wonder why you endured so much ... but .. did i mention i'm old ... and often grouchy ... unless you are a hot provider, naked .. on your knees .. etc ... etc....

PS ... let this post serve as a warning to the austin ladies and those touring ladies ... if you see 'dodger' or 'codger' in a msg ... just delete and move on with your life ... probably safer for both of us
tzv13's Avatar
  • tzv13
  • 07-10-2015, 09:13 PM
Dodger if I ever make it to 70, I hope to be like you.
dodger's Avatar
Dodger if I ever make it to 70, I hope to be like you. Originally Posted by tzv13
be careful what you ask for ... actually... i root that you exceed me in all regards ...