Many people assume that late-life divorces are precipitated by some crisis, typically a man leaving his wife for another woman. But a 2004 AARP survey of people who divorced at older ages found that two-thirds were initiated by the woman, often to the surprise of the man.Any reality checks from this group?
Although men are more likely to instigate a divorce when they have another partner in sight, women are more likely to say they just couldn't stand to be with this partner any more, which jibes with the research showing that women are physiologically and emotionally more sensitive to the negative effects of an unsatisfying relationship.
The rise in divorce rates for older people, which is occurring in Great Britain, Canada and Japan, as well as the United States, results from the confluence of two new trends. The first is that we expect more from marriage than in the past. It's no longer enough for the other partner to be a good provider or a good housekeeper. We want marriage to include friendship, sexual satisfaction and an interesting give-and-take between equals. The second is that if a marriage ceases to meet their needs, older people have many more alternatives than they used to.