Any tips on DO's and DONT's for first encounter?

unreal23's Avatar
Hello everyone,

I am meeting a provider for the first time ever tomorrow. She is fairly well reviewed based on my research. I am still really nervous about it. I know not to equate money to services in any verbal or written way. I have read through many posts in this section and much of it is from the provider perspective. Any tips? The residence is an apt complex and she will give me the address as I am driving there. I guess I plan to walk in, hug etc and place the envelope on a table or something?

I am freaked out now after reading everyone's experiences!
aRandyOne's Avatar
Here's a great idea: Ask way before arrival if you can take a quick shower when you first get there. Most providers will appreciate your attention to cleanliness. Take everything EXCEPT the envelope with you into the bathroom and leave the envelope in plain sight for her. Shower. When you come out of the shower all squeaky clean usually you'll find the envelope has been whisked away by the envelope fairy and there will be a relaxed yet nude provider on the bed, rarin' to go. Won't work with anyone but a well known, well reviewed provider but you don't see those BP only cash-and-dash skanks, do ya?
unreal23's Avatar
Would that matter if they were LE? They would just wait for me and wait to come out and I am back to square 1!
Would that matter if they were LE? They would just wait for me and wait to come out and I am back to square 1! Originally Posted by unreal23
If they are LE you won't have to worry about taking a shower. The moment you walk in they will shower you with your Miranda Rights and a Misdemeanor Summons to sign. don't worry they will provide the Pen.
unreal23's Avatar
I am freaked out now, I think I will just ask to meet for coffee offering the same donation and maybe ask her for outcall on a later day if I feel good about it. I imagine that involves a much smaller risk.
If she's well-reviewed, you'll be fine. Did she screen you? I'll bet she did. If she's comfortable meeting you, then you should be comfortable meeting her.

If you're that freaked out, maybe this isn't the thing for you.
If she is we'll reviewed you might want to post who this girl is. I'm sure someone on the board will give you much needed advice on the girl. One thing you want to do is relax. If it shows that your nervous, it might make her nervous also. The shower idea is a good ice breaker but watch out the cash and dash artist. Most important thing is to have fun.
aRandyOne's Avatar
Again, if she is well reviewed as opposed to a BP only girl, cash and dash from her incall is not a likely happenstance. Hell, most of the time I ask for an opening shower I find a naked lady sliding in the shower to join me in the hot steamy water. But then I confine myself to Eccie providers with proven track records.
bistraight69's Avatar
HAVE FUN!!!!!!
LargeHam's Avatar
If you have done your research and she is well reviewed by men with many reviews, especially reviews on multiple boards, and actively participates on boards, one, then go ahead and take the plunge.
We've all been in your shoes, and unless you have absolutely nothing to lose, we all get very nervous. I still do when seeing a new provider, especially if it is her incall. I have a lot of respect for the guys willing to be the first for a new provider. Somebody has to. But, that is just too risky for me.
You are way overthinking this! If she is well reviewed on the board by multiple guys with established review histories, you have nothing to worry about (at least from an LE perspective). Still a good idea not to ever explicitly talk about money for service, but more because you might put her on edge than because you have anything to worry about. Put your money down somewhere in the open when you arrive, chat for a little to get comfortable, and then make your move when you're ready. I usually ask to take a shower, but not because I'm trying to avoid LE; I find it relaxing, lets her know I'm squeaky clean so I get better mileage, and it's a good way to transition to the fun activities. Being nervous the first time is normal, but try to relax and enjoy yourself; the more uptight you are the more likely you are to make her nervous.
unreal23's Avatar
Thanks for all the responses everyone - Sounds like I am not the only one to feel this way. I was browsing through another site which allows hobbyists to post their experience when busted. Looked like most of them were responding to BP / CL or approached at hotel bars.
My first advice to any guy thinking about seeing hsi first provider is simple: DON'T!

Don't do it, at all. It is a trap. Once you fall victim to the skills of a great provider, you will never be able to escape the clutches of this hobby.

OK. If you are still reading this, you probably are going to ignore my best advice. That said, see well reviewed providers. They will walk you through the jitters and then literally suck the life right out of you.

You really have to participate in this hobby at a level you are comfortable with. Comfort levels have many divisions.

Are you comfortable on a moral/social/religious level having sex with basically a total stranger? Sure, by the end of your first visit, you may no longer be total strangers, but at the beginning?

Are you comfortable with the risk you are exposing yourself to being caught? Risk with your family relationships? Risk with you employment? Risk within your social circles?

Are you comfortable with the level of risk that comes with a street walker? With a BP/CL escort? With a BP/CL rub & tug gal? With a well reviewed provider from a board like this? (could be an independent, an agency or a studio.) With an AMP gal? With a dancer in a strip club? With a plain ol RMT/LMT massage therapist who may provide a little rub & tug after getting to know you better? Each one of these options can result in different risk assessments. Of course, you have decide the fear of risk versus the thrill of the risk that you can tolerate.

Are you comfortable with the cost of your choice. Each of the options I outlined above have varying different cost with a large variance even within a class of provider.

It should be a decision that you weigh very carefully. Sadly, most of us, including myself, do our thinking with the wrong part of our brain and it too frequently leads to costs that we were not expecting.
rogerdodger's Avatar
you know, this was me before my 1st ... extremely nervous, worried about being arrested, thinking that i would stick it in and explode !!! really. and i appreciate your apprehension. after all, it's not like you are a virgin about to bust a cherry legally. unfortunately, this is illegal - but i'm past that and you should get past it too.

as the others have mentioned - it seems you are playing in the safest manner. you have selected a well-reviewed lady with "known" skill and "professional". it's like the difference between taking your car to the backyard mechanic and the best guy in town. you are going to get what you pay for. only ... it's going to be enjoyable.

my experience is ... you should relax AND pay pretty strict attention to what goes on, from a personal perspective. your first will be a benchmark for not only what you will expect for your second, but to compare your experience to the others already posted. looking past the obvious 'Penthouse forum' comments ... did she do something for you that was great ? and ... (obviously) did she look like she was all that ?

I have found through my experience that certain posters have different expectations than i do ... and pictures are not always exact. but ... lots of fun will be had. my 1st was not my best - but it was damn excellent. and if she was still around, i'd still be seeing her.
waverunner234's Avatar
Here's another approach that takes away the nervousness.
I also only go for highly reviewed providers, mostly from TER, 8+
But I email a few weeks in advance for a meeting. And provide my refs. and ask her if she wants to share a few emails with me to get to know each other a little better.
And just to get rid of the awkward feeling of being intimate with a complete stranger.

It has always worked for me, by the time we met we were more "friend" than provider-client. And usually we have exchanged more than 30 emails by the time we met.
Another good idea is, in such emails ask her what flowers she loves, and what wine or champagne she likes the most, and bring them.
Really it ads to the quality of you visit, and most of the time also to the length.

One more thing, see if she has her own website, if she does she is really serious about her work.

In one case I went even further and asked her for her dress and breast size and bought some nice lingerie from Victoria's Secret. But that was a case where we emailed 7 weeks before we met and were real friends at the time.

waverunner234