Decoding English

DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

40-ish........................... .......49.
Adventurous................... .....Slept with everyone.
Athletic...................... ..........No boobs.
... Average looking....................Moo oo.
Beautiful..................... ..........Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure................On medication.
Feminist...................... .........Fat.
Free Spirit........................ ....Junkie.
Friendship first......................For mer Slut.
New-Age........................... ...Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned..................... ..No B.J.'s
Open-minded........................ Desperate.
Outgoing...................... .........Loud and embarrassing.
Professional.................. .........Bitch.
Voluptuous.................... ........Very fat.
Large frame......................... ..Hugely fat.
Wants soul mate.....................Stalk er.

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

Yes........................... ..........No
No............................ ..........Yes
Maybe......................... ........No
We need.......................... .....I want
I am sorry......................... ....You'll be sorry
We need to talk......................You' re in trouble
Sure, go ahead........................Y ou better not
Do what you want...................You will pay for this later
I am not upset........................O f course, I am upset, you moron!
You're very attentive tonight............Is sex all you ever think about?

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING MEN'S ENGLISH:

I am hungry........................ ...I am hungry
I am sleepy........................ ....I am sleepy
I am tired......................... .....I am tired
Nice dress......................... .....Nice cleavage!
I love you........................... ...Let's have sex now
I am bored......................... ....Do you want to have sex?
May I have this dance?.................I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I call you sometime?..............I'd like to have sex with you.
Do you want to go to a movie?......I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I take you out to dinner?........I'd like to have sex with you.
I don't think those shoes go with that outfit..............I'm gay.

Meant to be funny but there's probably more than a grain of truth in some of these.

Thanks Captain- all so true and too funny.

Most of all I agree with>>>>>>>

Republicans are Red
Democrats are Blue
Neither one of them
Gives a Fuck about you.

DON'T RE-ELECT ANYONE!!!!

Lmao!!

Review English:

Not quite bbw ....... Trying to make myself feel better for fucking a fat chick.

lol