Maintaining contact with your ATF during forced dry spells

Sir Lancehernot's Avatar
The topic on small talk prompted me to think about this, and I'd like to throw it out for discussion.

First off, my preferred methods of contact are e-mail or PM. I try to schedule at least a day in advance, preferably more, and the lead time allows both of us to work on setting the appointment when its convenient -- e.g., she's not returning my call when I'm at work, and I'm not calling her when she's in a session. I use text and phone the day of the appointment, when immediacy becomes more important, and when I use the phone, my calls are seldom more than a minute or two in length.

Given all that, I'm in the middle of a long, induced-by-uncertainty-in-the-employment-situation-and-a-reduction-in-income dry spell. I have a couple of lady friends who are aware of this. Though the natire of the business always raises doubts about sincerity, they've said it's okay to e-mail them even if I can't set an appointment. I've done so a few of times, maybe every month or month-and-a-half, just to say hi and let them know that I haven't forgotten them (like that really matters) and that I do intend to schedule as soon as the income issues get resolved.

So my questions:
Is it appropriate to contact your regular/favorite/ATF under such circumstances?
Guys: Do you initiate contact with your faves when you can't see them for nan extended period?
Ladies: Do you welcome such contact, merely tolerate it, or dislike it? Does it affect your willingness to see a client, either positively or negatively?
All: If such contact is not inappropriate, what "rules" should be observed?
I think this is a great question and I'm interested to see the discussion evolve.
The topic on small talk prompted me to think about this, and I'd like to throw it out for discussion.

First off, my preferred methods of contact are e-mail or PM. I try to schedule at least a day in advance, preferably more, and the lead time allows both of us to work on setting the appointment when its convenient -- e.g., she's not returning my call when I'm at work, and I'm not calling her when she's in a session. I use text and phone the day of the appointment, when immediacy becomes more important, and when I use the phone, my calls are seldom more than a minute or two in length.

Given all that, I'm in the middle of a long, induced-by-uncertainty-in-the-employment-situation-and-a-reduction-in-income dry spell. I have a couple of lady friends who are aware of this. Though the natire of the business always raises doubts about sincerity, they've said it's okay to e-mail them even if I can't set an appointment. I've done so a few of times, maybe every month or month-and-a-half, just to say hi and let them know that I haven't forgotten them (like that really matters) and that I do intend to schedule as soon as the income issues get resolved.

So my questions:
Is it appropriate to contact your regular/favorite/ATF under such circumstances?
Guys: Do you initiate contact with your faves when you can't see them for nan extended period?
Ladies: Do you welcome such contact, merely tolerate it, or dislike it? Does it affect your willingness to see a client, either positively or negatively?
All: If such contact is not inappropriate, what "rules" should be observed? Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

Seriously? You need us to do your thinking for you? Just do whatever the fuck you want to do. It's ok.
L.A.'s Avatar
  • L.A.
  • 07-25-2013, 08:43 AM
I think contact by email or PM is pretty non-intrusive and gives them the option of reading and answering whenever they want to. Texts and phone calls are a bit more intrusive and I would be more hesitant to do that. Of course it all depends on the relationship you have with your provider....you can always just ask her too if it's ok with her.
I don't have the financial problem you're having, SL so I wouldn't know. I can imagine tho, the girls would prefer the contact lead to a date. But, if you've helped your ATF OTC and y'all get along and love to talk...this kinda thing seems to be mostly up to her.

Good luck to you; hope the financial situation improves.
I take breaks all the time.. While I make petty damn good money and live in a $1M house in UP/HP- with an SO it is not always easy to purge away 300-500 bucks without some alarm bells going off (I can only say I am buying some weed every so often!!).. I stay in touch with the girls I see.. they don't seem to mind..
Good luck to you-work hard on a new position and I am sure things will change for the better.
pyramider's Avatar
If they really missed you they would be sending you taint photos.
Well, I don't have the financial issues, but myself I am taking short break, more like, since not sure I want to see anyone soon. But I have pretty much constant communication with my ATF. Quite a bit of time I don't initiate either. We just enjoy flirting or just saying hi either via Email.

I only do that with one girl though. Anyone else, its only when I am ready to see or trying to see them.

So it all depends, if the girl truly enjoys the banter, then by all means nothing wrong with that. But I wouldn't constantly initiate the communication though.
Jewish Lawyer's Avatar
I would say send a quarterly email to let her know you still like her, but are practicing prudence due to Obama's economy fucking everything up.
Captain Caveman's Avatar
There are about three providers I talk to somewhat regularly. Usually it is something anecdotal (and relevant, and quite possibly hilarious). They know my personality and I have gotten to know theirs. They are free to answer me... or not. If they do, great! If not, well, then I am not worried. I am just secure in my bad-assery... as well as them.
I personally don't mind the "small talk" as long as it is not just to pass time cause your bored ... I understand that money gets tight and schedules get busy ... So as long as it will eventually lead somewhere I don't mind a "how ya doing" or "I ain't forgot about you" message to keep an open line of communication ... Although I can't always respond immediately I do try to respond to all messages.
dallasfan's Avatar
I wouldn't unless she welcomes it or initiates contact. For most girls, this is their job. They are in it to make money. Sure they get a thousand email, text, pms that lead to nothing and takes up their time.

There are only 3 girls i see that i text casually and the are all strippers that i've seen regularly over the years.
Never mind...
The topic on small talk prompted me to think about this, and I'd like to throw it out for discussion.

First off, my preferred methods of contact are e-mail or PM. I try to schedule at least a day in advance, preferably more, and the lead time allows both of us to work on setting the appointment when its convenient -- e.g., she's not returning my call when I'm at work, and I'm not calling her when she's in a session. I use text and phone the day of the appointment, when immediacy becomes more important, and when I use the phone, my calls are seldom more than a minute or two in length.

Given all that, I'm in the middle of a long, induced-by-uncertainty-in-the-employment-situation-and-a-reduction-in-income dry spell. I have a couple of lady friends who are aware of this. Though the natire of the business always raises doubts about sincerity, they've said it's okay to e-mail them even if I can't set an appointment. I've done so a few of times, maybe every month or month-and-a-half, just to say hi and let them know that I haven't forgotten them (like that really matters) and that I do intend to schedule as soon as the income issues get resolved.

So my questions:
Is it appropriate to contact your regular/favorite/ATF under such circumstances? Yes. If you were contacting them every other day, they might think you were hinting around for a freebie. But if you were a regular, then, of course, she would already know what a respectful gentleman you are and would be happy to know that you still think about her.
Guys: Do you initiate contact with your faves when you can't see them for nan extended period?
Ladies: Do you welcome such contact, merely tolerate it, or dislike it? Does it affect your willingness to see a client, either positively or negatively? Everyone likes to know when they are missed. I'm always glad to know that the reason a regular stops seeing me is not because I've been replaced by another "ATF"
All: If such contact is not inappropriate, what "rules" should be observed? Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot
Don't be offended if a provider doesn't have the time to reply to every "Hi, what's up?" message that the receive.
mark77070's Avatar
SweetMelody's comment pretty much sums up my experience. The providers are in this for the business, not the GFE e-mails. I have PM'd various providers to thank them after a great session and not even received an acknowledgement. And after setting the appointment for a future date, the PM flirting is abruptly curtailed. I don't hold that against them. In fact, I would say that my ATF is below average on the PM responses. And right now I'm laying low for a reason not financial: my SO has suddenly gotten interested in me again! And I too worry that my favorite providers will forget me. So, I'm glad for this thread to bring the topic out in the open.

But, guys, remember: these ladies are professionals. We're self-medicating with professional sex workers, not engaging real girlfriends. That's both the strength of this hobby as well as its greatest weakness. Sure you could get a nonprofessional girlfriend online or at a bar, but it gets messy. One of you will fall in love and it gets real, real messy. Be thankful for the wonderful providers, but don't try to squeeze something more out of the relationship. It isn't there.