Ghosting

For the ladies.

Ghosting.

What are the reasons this occurs? You make the appointment and give address and then when notified of arrival and asked for room or apartment number nothing but cricket's chirping in the background.

From what I know, some providers either double book so the first one there gets the appointment, or it just so happened that a regular of hers wanted to see her last minute for a quickie and she squeezed him in while you were on the way and is still in a position with him (no pun intended) to where she cannot respond. If she bothers to respond later after you left, a couple of the reasons you will get from her are going to be her phone died or she overslept.

I can't speak for anyone else, but the reason this has very infrequently happened with me is actually because I was asleep. I gave the address the night before and, in the morning, you text but get no answer, despite no answer from me you come anyways (or you don't text at all and just show up) and end up sitting at my rendezvous spot, getting increasingly pissed off at me, all while I'm sleeping, blissfully unaware.

A way that I avoid this happening again is that I won't give out the address the night before anymore. That way, if I over sleep and inadvertently ghost you, at least you stayed in the comfort of your home and didn't waste time or gas driving out here.

A way that you can prevent this from happening is, if you have previously been given the addy, still be sure to text to confirm in the morning before you head over. If you don't receive a reply, don't come.

I know it is upsetting to drive to a place and be left sitting there; but try to remember that there is the possibility that she's not ghosting you on purpose.



I will add one more thing, if you do get ghosted, it is never appropriate to come to her door anyways. Especially if she has rendezvous spot that you're supposed to stop at first, like I do.

If you're sitting there with no reply, please don't assume that it's okay for you to just go ahead to her place anyways AND if you should (mistakenly) decide to just go on to her place despite no communication from her, please do not assume that it's okay for you to let yourself in.

"... but Heidi, that's crazy," you say. "Why would anyone ever do that?"

I don't know, but it happened to me. Scared the shit out of me and I wasn't very nice after that.

I did offer to still see him, but a bit later after I had time to clean up and he accepted. Then he ghosted me.

Providers need to discover the alarm feature on their phones

This is why someone (male or female) ghosts you:

Because they are inconsiderate of you and your time.

better choices maybe
if it's early AM I can see someone over sleeping ..
it's best to confirm 1-2 hr's before set time and if you don't hear from her with in a reasonable time, so you can drive to her area ,might get ghosted.

This question was for the girls. Men I do not care. I was ghosted twice by some well known names. I will not say who. Just got me curious why it happens. Sleep thing I can see. For the ladies that answered, thank you.

I do not think there is ANY reason to ghost once an appt has been made. On either side. It is incredibly unprofessional from a provider standpoint and utterly rude and disrespectful otherwise. With all the technology there is ZERO reason. Be a decent person and cancel.

I agree. You agree on the time, I bust hump to fight traffic and get there on time...and then nothing when I text for the number.

Thank you for the response.

Lots of sleepy girls and broken phones is what I have been told. I suspect that often you are just outbid with a offer she prefers over yours at the last minute. I did have one tell me she was smoking and forgot our confirmation from 15 minutes earlier. She was now at Walmart and was canceling our appointment.

This question was for the girls. Men I do not care. I was ghosted twice by some well known names. I will not say who. Just got me curious why it happens. Sleep thing I can see. For the ladies that answered, thank you. Originally Posted by Dick Goesinya

The question may be for the girls, but the guys like myself, who the ghosting also has happened to, chimed in to tell their first hand experiences.

By the way, a lady who gives you any reason for ghosting/not replying to a client in the parking lot is not going to be acceptable is it? Any provider that admits ghosting a client will definitely lose business, no matter what they may deem acceptable or rational to do so.

If huge red flags are made too close to meeting time, I have ghosted but not after I've given an address.

If we have never met, I already have anticipation nerves. I love to talk your boner up from when your leaving your place all the way till you leave my place but if you start asking about donations during that time you bet your ass I'm going to disappear. It's just shady and you already know all that stuff or else you would not have booked. Or the off chance I'm still searching for any info I can find and I find some not so pleasant info that slipped my grips earlier.

This is why someone (male or female) ghosts you:

Because they are inconsiderate of you and your time.


Originally Posted by slubby

I don’t think there are many excuses that are acceptable. Just inconsiderate and a don’t give a shit mentality.

From what I know, some providers either double book so the first one there gets the appointment, or it just so happened that a regular of hers wanted to see her last minute for a quickie and she squeezed him in while you were on the way and is still in a position with him (no pun intended) to where she cannot respond. If she bothers to respond later after you left, a couple of the reasons you will get from her are going to be her phone died or she overslept. Originally Posted by Wile E Coyote

Ugh I'm my mind, that is unacceptable behavior from a lady and is just plain gross.

Ladies that ghost gents on a regular basis aren't going to hop on this thread and offer reasons, so you may never know the full answer to your question.