LOVE-When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
LUST-When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE-When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.
LOVE-When intercourse is called "making love.',
LUST-When intercourse is called "screwing."
MARRIAGE - When intercourse is a town in Pennsylvania.
LOVE-When you argue over how many children to have.
LUST-When you argue over who gets the wet spot.
MARRIAGE-When you argue over whose idea it was to have kids.
LOVE-When you share everything you own.
LUST-When you steal everything they own.
MARRIAGE - When the bank owns everything.
LOVE-When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
LUST-When the relationship is over if you don't climax.
MARRIAGE-When ... uh ... what's a climax?
LOVE-When you phone each other just to say, "Hi."
LUST-When you phone each other to pick a hotel room.
MARRIAGE-When you phone each other to bitch.
LOVE-When you write poems about your partner.
LUST-When all you write is your phone number.
MARRIAGE-When all you write is checks.
LOVE-When your only concern is for your partner's feelings.
LUST-When your only concern is to find a room with mirrors all
around.
MARRIAGE - When you're only concern is what's on TV.
LOVE-When you see each other as often as possible.
LUST-When you only see each other naked.
MARRIAGE-When you never see each other awake.
LOVE-When your heart flutters every time you see them.
LUST-When your groin twitches every time you see them.
MARRIAGE-When your wallet empties every time you see them.
LOVE-When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you
feel.
LUST-When the song on the radio determines how you do it.
MARRIAGE-When you listen to talk radio.
LOVE-When breaking up is something you try not to think about.
LUST-When staying together is something you try not to think
about.
MARRIAGE-When just getting through the day is your only thought
LOVE-When you're only interested in doing things with your
partner.
LUST-When you're only interested in doing things TO your partner.
MARRIAGE-When you're only interested in your golf score.