Date with a Civilian

I had a date with a civilian last night. My first date since wandering into the hobby. After two hours of listening to her talk about her recently-ex husband, her son who lives with her and doesn't have a job or go to school, her recent nightmare dates and her endless financial difficulties, I was left again wondering why I should want to get back into the dating scene, looking for a relationship.

Maybe it didn't help that I had a threesome the night before.

I guess I'm preaching to the choir here. Anyone out there actually want to "date"? If not, why not? If so, what are you doing here and what do want out of a girlfriend you can't get from a provider?

I'd be interested in hearing providers' views on this too.

If it flies, floats or fucks it's cheaper to rent it.

Actually, that sounds like the same discussions I have with providers during pillow talk. Only I know I'll get fucked before or after - not necessarily guaranteed on a civilian date.

And on a first date - a real date - it's awkward to ask, "are you bbbjtccim?"

I had a date with a civilian last night. My first date since wandering into the hobby. After two hours of listening to her talk about her recently-ex husband, her son who lives with her and doesn't have a job or go to school, her recent nightmare dates and her endless financial difficulties, I was left again wondering why I should want to get back into the dating scene, looking for a relationship.

Maybe it didn't help that I had a threesome the night before.

I guess I'm preaching to the choir here. Anyone out there actually want to "date"? If not, why not? If so, what are you doing here and what do want out of a girlfriend you can't get from a provider?

I'd be interested in hearing providers' views on this too. Originally Posted by clusterlizard

Just think of a date as a job interview for a future wife, a wife that you hope to obtain a lot from more than sex.

I have been married three times, and have three families to show for it. Plus all of the inlays, children, step children, grandchildren etc. I wouldn't trade it for the world. The first two wives died, the third is now in ill health - so the hobby has been a great help during times of need.

The question is for the guys, what are your needs? Do you need sex, and a short time of relaxation. Sex is great when you have that from one woman who is also your partner. However, there are times, and there are other times.

When each of the first two wives passed, I could have had my pick of many women for "free". However, "free" brings with it the wide social circle of women talking to other women, and other women.

When a guy is dating, you need to think about a lot of things other than the woman you are going on a date with, a lot of other things. You need to think of how you, as a guy, controls the situation and if you truly enjoy the company of the women you date. That means - no sex until you are more sure of the ground upon which you play.

"After two hours of listening to her talk about her recently-ex husband, her son who lives with her and doesn't have a job or go to school, her recent nightmare dates and her endless financial difficulties,..."

This should tell you you don't want to take her out again, even if the sex is free because you are tying an Albatross around your neck (from the poem The Rime of the Ancient Mariner - 1834 by Samuel Taylor Coleridge; or do they still make kids read this in High School English Class?)

Girls in the hobby, don't follow us home after we leave; or at least they are not suppose to. You are not going to marry them. They best ones make you feel at home, and comfortable; and you may come back. The worst ones bitch, complain, ask for more money than first requested, etc. So, you don't come back.

The dating scene, or the hobby: neither one are the problem. The problem is trying to understand the individual woman you are with.

Good luck on that!

JR

If it flies, floats or fucks it's cheaper to rent it. Originally Posted by Spanky0800

I have owned several homes, even though it is cheaper to rent.

I have owned my own plane and my own boat. As for my wives, it felt great to say this is mine!

Sometimes, it just is better to spend the money - and be happy.


JR

i came this close to suggesting she go pro...

Actually, that sounds like the same discussions I have with providers during pillow talk. Only I know I'll get fucked before or after - not necessarily guaranteed on a civilian date. Originally Posted by eframz

nice.

Just think of a date as a job interview for a future wife, a wife that you hope to obtain a lot from more than sex.

I have been married three times, and have three families to show for it. Plus all of the inlays, children, step children, grandchildren etc. I wouldn't trade it for the world. The first two wives died, the third is now in ill health - so the hobby has been a great help during times of need.

The question is for the guys, what are your needs? Do you need sex, and a short time of relaxation. Sex is great when you have that from one woman who is also your partner. However, there are times, and there are other times.

When each of the first two wives passed, I could have had my pick of many women for "free". However, "free" brings with it the wide social circle of women talking to other women, and other women.

When a guy is dating, you need to think about a lot of things other than the woman you are going on a date with, a lot of other things. You need to think of how you, as a guy, controls the situation and if you truly enjoy the company of the women you date. That means - no sex until you are more sure of the ground upon which you play.

"After two hours of listening to her talk about her recently-ex husband, her son who lives with her and doesn't have a job or go to school, her recent nightmare dates and her endless financial difficulties,..."

This should tell you you don't want to take her out again, even if the sex is free because you are tying an Albatross around your neck (from the poem The Rime of the Ancient Mariner - 1834 by Samuel Taylor Coleridge; or do they still make kids read this in High School English Class?)

Girls in the hobby, don't follow us home after we leave; or at least they are not suppose to. You are not going to marry them. They best ones make you feel at home, and comfortable; and you may come back. The worst ones bitch, complain, ask for more money than first requested, etc. So, you don't come back.

The dating scene, or the hobby: neither one are the problem. The problem is trying to understand the individual woman you are with.

Good luck on that!

JR Originally Posted by JRLawrence

Make a SB out of her and be happy.

she's my age. maybe her daughter...

Make a SB out of her and be happy. Originally Posted by i'va biggen

Civilian? What are these girls all Military? Where's the camo?

Anyone out there actually want to "date"? If not, why not? If so, what are you doing here and what do want out of a girlfriend you can't get from a provider? Originally Posted by clusterlizard

I'd like to know the answer to this too.
Why would a client want to "date" a provider?

I'll be honest I think I would much rather date then be in the hobby but as someone pointed out it is cheaper to rent then purchase and also you are guaranteed of what your getting.

After going to enough bars and spending the same amount of dough just to watch them walk out the door with someone else or dinner and whatever to listen to everything and then them not seem one bit interested in you, I mean why bother.

After getting settled in and past the pressure issue, I found I can make plans with a provider and make it the perfect date. Whether that be dinner that ends in a simple bj or a quickie when the time is short and if you get the right one and you want to talk they will listen (the wrong one well the pretend to listen, I seriously wouldn't tell either too much but still).

It works and thats all that matters

I'd like to know the answer to this too.
Why would a client want to "date" a provider? Originally Posted by Allie_Kat

I think the OP is referring to dating outside the hobby.

That's a whole 'nother question , but I'm happy to go there. I've sort-of had this argument in the men's lounge.

Just because you're a provider and I'm a client doesn't imbue either of us with "trans-human" qualities. There may be some things about our respective personalities that permit us to engage in such activities where a "normal" person may be less likely but, ultimately, we're both human and subject to the power of Mother Nature.

It's only natural that a provider and client who otherwise click would think about dating, as two people. Rational thinking may stop that; in other words, override our nature. In other cases, one or both may give in to it.

I'm not commenting on whether or not it's a good idea, just that I don't see why it should seem strange that one or both in a provider/client relationship would see the other as a desirable mate.

After all, it happens in all professions. That's why doctors and psychologists have a provider/patient ethical code governing it.

I'd like to know the answer to this too.
Why would a client want to "date" a provider? Originally Posted by Allie_Kat