AIsstant With Benefits

I am a single dad (full time) and manage a team (full time). When my kiddos are with their mom (some weekends), I spend every minute at my office. I do this to allow a better work-life balance when they are home.

I do not have time to seriously date. I can have a fling whenever I want but a fling is not satisfying to me.

I dream about having a loyal assistant at work that has a fetish for occasionally humping the boss. I would still need a competent, detail-oriented partner that could grow my business and help manage my affairs. I just would rather share my business instead of my kids with her.

Is this such a weird fetish (as weird as marriage seems to be anyway lol)?
pyramider's Avatar
You do realize this is a SHMB, right?
General Feuerbacher's Avatar
texascoffee,if u follow through u will be fucked over royally. do not do it. hire a good and ugly assistant.the money it will cost the other way will knock u down
OldGrump's Avatar
Keep that fantasy in your mind - while you enjoy a fully paid NSA session with an established provider. Then hire a competent assistant to release your time - not your erection.
The fantasy is awesome...if only it could work!
golfertexas's Avatar
Won't work been there done that ......got the tee shirt !!!!!!!!! Do as the general says !!!!!!
Don't do it. You WILL LOSE ----------- A LOT!!!
I have an attorney buddy that keeps sleeping with his assistants and he has a revolving door. I on the other hand keep training assistants that move up and out after a year (which is great but is also somewhat of a door..).

I watched the movie secretary the other day and it moved me a little lol. Unrealistic but It is a great fantasy.
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SHMB Severe Hypersensitivity to Mosquito Bites
SHMB Siliceous High Magnesium Basalt (petrology)
SHMB State Health Management Boards (Nigeria)
omakase's Avatar
Unless you live in Iowa. Then you may get away for firing someone for being too attractive.

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/2444222
CitationXPilot's Avatar
If you get the taint then do it, no taint, no deal
xoxoalice's Avatar
Can relate to your situation and admire your dedication to your kids.
The cards are stacked in the pile of it not working . . . hope you find a fit solution to meet your lifestyle.
pyramider's Avatar
Acronym Definition
SHMB Severe Hypersensitivity to Mosquito Bites
SHMB Siliceous High Magnesium Basalt (petrology)
SHMB State Health Management Boards (Nigeria) Originally Posted by texascoffee

SHMB Silly Hooktard Message Board

If you thinck your idea has merit, go for it ... what is the worst that could happen?
That is a GREAT idea and you should do it!

Btw..please send me the employee's contact information since you'll eventually grow tired of the setup and be looking for ways to get rid of her. She'll need a good attorney to skin you alive. Please start setting aside some $$ now as she'll likely be looking to extort some $$ from you before she calls your soon-to-be-ex wife.

Btw..please send me your wife's contact info too. That'll be one divorce...you'll be the offending party so plan on losing more than your community share..child support so you'll need to be prepared to start selling your kidneys and a portion of your liver..plus those free sperm samples you gave to the ex-employee now suing you..you'll need to start selling your sperm and quite possibly your hair.

Lesson No. 1..don't shit where you eat.
Lesson No. 2..don't let the little head think for you.

This is a horrible idea..
Red Tex's Avatar
There are several strippers I have done this with...they are not smart enough to rat on me. But I am not married. It is nice being able to fuck a girl on the payroll when she knows she is there only to fuck you. My files are still out of order, because I asked a stripper to do it!